Knot with you

fourteen knot

I didn't expect to see them.. God! My eyes went wide than its normal and my jaw dropped.. halos hindi ko maikilos ang aking paa sa sobrang gulat,

"A-anak ko" my mom run towards me and hug me so tight, halos mapa-iyak ako sa higpit ng akap nito. "Oh I'm sorry iha.. oh my God finally we found you" mom was crying so hard ,dad pat her and rub my shoulder

Hindi ako makapaniwala na pagkalipas ng ilang taon ay muli kaming magkikita ng magulang ko parang kanina lang inaalala ko sila, 7 years was too long, 7 years i've been alone and longing for them. Hindi ko makuha ang tamang salita para sakanila, i just let my tears pour, I was still shock that they are in front of me and.. really? Hugging me?

"Phoebe, saan ka ba nag-tungo? We look for you" my brow creased . "Halos lahat ng bansa sinuyod namin ang airlines, pero ni isa wala kaming nakuhang lead kung nasaan ka" my mom said

"I change my name" cold kong sabi, hindi ko alam panu ko sila kakausapin ng maayos

"Thank God your ninong tell us to go here now," she added, my dad didn't say anything

Nilingon ko si ninong "iha, they have to know" simple nitong sabi

"Anong dapat namin malaman kumpadre?" Sa wakasdad spoke, tinanguan lang ako ni ninong , telling me to say what should I have to say

"Anak, please tell us" mom held my hands tightly ,i bit my lip

"I have cancer, and I'm dying, I didn't want to bother anyone coz I know I can face this"

"Holy shit"dad cursed and mom cry as hard as I already died

"No, no no.. this is a joke.. you're kidding us Phoebe" i smile weakly and rub my finger to mom's face

"I hope it was a joke mom, but its not, " they both hug me and cry on my shoulder..

All of my life I was longing for they warm hugs, all my life I'm hoping they love me back, bakit ngayon lang nila to ginawa? Bakit kung kaylan nasa bingit na ko ng kamatayan? Bakit kung kaylang sugat sugat na ang puso ko

They talk about my condition and what treatment should I undergo, mom and dad begs for ninong to do evrything he can, napag-alaman ko din na kasal na si Pheme almost 5 years right now,

Kahit ano pa lang nagawa nila sayo nuon, handa ka pa din mag paraya at mag patawad, all I am asking was a little love from my family,

Halos isang lingo na din simula ng mag pakita sila mommy sakin, they ask me to stay at their house here in Ottawa, dito pala sila tumira since they left Philippines, mayroon mang gap between me and my parents dahil sa past nakuha ko pa din silang makasama at makaharap everyday, they never failed me to make happy everyday,

Sabi nga, once you forgive ,you can be fully happy,. And eto ako ngayon masaya dahil sa wakas , na-aknowledge din ako ng magulang ko,.Na halos buong buhay kong pinag hirapan mapansin lang nila, etong sakit ko lang pala ang solusyon.

Dumungaw ako sa malaking glass window ng kwarto ko, malapit nang mag sunset, pero hindi ko ito makikita ng maganda unlike sa resort ko tanaw na tanaw ang ganda ng pag lubog nito,

I exhale a deep breathe, my vision became blurry, i heard knocks on my door ,calling out my name but I can't utter a word nor move, I became numb and the last words i heard was

"Phoebe I'm here"