Love, Hart [Discontinued]

seventeen

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RUBY

My life is an organized mess.

Always has been.

I live within the mess I call my room, yet I'm aware of where everything resides. Whether it be a pencil or a pair of socks.

And I put up with the mess of a state i'm in almost everyday. It's something you grow accustomed to after a while.

The only organized thing in my life is my journal. The little book with its brown, leather covers that could fit into the side of your pocket with ease.

I always had it with me and I always knew where it was. Whether it be in my hand, my bag, my nightstand, or my back pocket. I was always aware of it.

Now though, I have no fucking clue where it is.

I think I'm on the verge of throwing up from all the terrible scenarios I've conjured up into my head.

The last place I had it was certainly at the beach. Now the only thought I have is that it is now drifting off with the tide while I'm here thinking It's hidden in my room somewhere.

"Are you all right?" A distant voice asked, though I payed to mind to anything but the whereabouts of my book.

It's probably being washed away by the harsh waves of the sea. Pages drenched and ink faded. What the fuck am I going to do?

Some may say I'm being dramatic, but these last few months were written into that journal and as many times as I say I want to forget the previous months, I'd still like to have them in my control.

And the polaroids of Alice were in them, too.

"Bambi?" The voice grew louder.

They were photos of us in our younger years. Pictures I promised to never forget. I suck at promises.

Perhaps one of my friends have it, I mean they were at the beach with me. No, not possible. They would've given it back to me the minute they found it.

What interest could the possible have in that ugly brown book anyways? My ugly brown book.

"Ruby!"

I jumped in the cushioned seat. Startled by the urgency in the voice that was calling. I whipped my eyes ahead of me to see a frantic Aven across from me.

I frowned and tuned back into everything. We were sitting in the middle of a diner that we found deeper into the city. It was situated right in the middle between a jewelry store and a record store.