one shots

I'll Remember Nights Alone (Frerard)

WARNING: SAD, MAYBE TRIGGERING

Nothing. Emptiness. That’s all the boys felt after the break-up. It was just a month after the official My Chemical Romance break-up but all four of them missed the band. Of course they had their solo careers but nothing compared to the experience they had with the band.

Right after their last show Frank and Gerard went MIA. The fans suspected that they were together and happy but the ugly truth was they were nowhere near each other even though that’s what both of them needed. Frank would sell his soul to see his true love’s face for the last time. Gerard on the other hand was acting all happy around the few people that knew where he was but in fact he was suicidal. He didn’t want this life anymore. Not without his Frankie, not without the band. Every day he sat in his apartment for a few hours spending the time crying and writing sappy love songs all subconsciously directed to Frank. He was hoping that the boy would notice and realize that Gerard loved him. But the words on his notebook never made to the studio. It hurt too much to sing those songs that he wrote on a paper soaked in tears. But the complete breakdown began when the nightmares came. At first it was nice. In his dreams he was with Frank and they were truly happy but that didn’t last long because every day he would wake up and start crying when he realized that the Frankie that must be in his arms is nowhere near him. He didn’t want to sleep in fear that he would have to face Frankie again. After a few days with no sleep Gerard completely crashed in a slumber disturbed by Frank’s voice saying hurtful and mean things. The man heard a scream and jumped awake only to realize that he was the one screaming. It was two in the morning and there he was, looking like a skeleton screaming his lungs out because he was away from the person he loved.

The next day a friend of his got worried and persuaded him to go out for a coffee. Gee left the apartment and went to the nearest coffee shop. He stopped dead in his track when a face inside caught his attention. Frank. What was he doing here? What was Gerard supposed to do? Say hello? Run? Ignore him? The last one wasn’t an option. In this moment Franks gaze met his and he smiled. Gerard’s heart warmed when he saw his boy smiling at him. He started walking towards him smiling himself. He hadn’t smiled in such a long time..

“Hello” Frank’s perfect voice interrupted Gerard’s thoughts

“Um..hi” he looked down. He couldn’t believe that he thought the man of his drems was so close to him and he didn’t even know. But he couldn’t do anything even though he just wanted to jump on him and kiss him until they were both gasping for air.

“So…”there was an awkward silence. There wasn’t much to talk about after the break-up and nobody mentioned that because it just makes the atmosphere tenser that it is already “How’s life going?”

It’s awful without you Frankie. Come back to me. We could fix it. Everything. Us. Gee thought.

“It..it’s okay…How about you?” he changed the topic.

“Oh life is going..good…just great..” Gerard was too engulfed in his thoughts to even notice the sarcasm in Frank’s voice.

Frank excused himself to the toilet but when he returned Gerard was gone along with the last chance of fixing things.

Frank got home slowly not bothering to take off his shoes when he entered the apartment. The only thing that was in his mind was Gerard. His Gerard. He was so close, probably just a few blocks away, and yet so far. But he didn’t want to bother him. It was obvious that his life was changing for the better while Frank’s was just becoming a bigger mess that it already was. Or at least that’s what Frank thought. A few tears escaped his eyes and it took him only a few seconds to completely break down. He was sobbing and desperately hitting the walls. He didn’t want to live anymore. Not without Gerard. Why didn’t he confess earlier? Maybe the band wouldn’t have broken up and he would be happy.

Gerard took the chance to go home. He didn’t want to ruin Frank’s life with his presence. It was obviously brighter that his. He sat on his bed taking his hair inbetween his fingers and pulling as hard as possible. “Dammit you idiot!” He screamed and smashed the nearest vase in the process. He then proceeded to jump on his bed and bury his head in the duvet. And apparently that’s how he fell asleep because he woke up to a bright light coming from his window. Ehen did he manage to pull the curtains? What was important at the moment was that this was the first dreamless night in a long, long time.

After his daily dose of crying he decided to make a proper meal-something he hadn’t done in almost two months. Suddenly there was a knock on the door. Little did Gerard know that opening the door would ruin his life. “Gee..I thought you would like to see that”. Mikey and Ray were standing in front of him with tear-stained cheeks holding on to each-others hands for dear life. Gerard glanced down at the news paper that the boys gave him.

FRANK IERO COMMITS SUICIDE

After the My Chemical Romance break-up it was particulary hard for the guitarist Frank Iero. He was the most devastated one in the group. “I can’t do this anymore. I’m sorry” he says in his suicide letter that is especially addressed to the vocalist of the band Gerard Way…”

Gerard couldn’t breathe. “G-give me the letter” he sobbed. Mikey passed him the folded piece of paper.

Dear Gee

You are my sunshine. You make me happy. I love you..Please don’t mourn over my death. Be happy…for me. I can’t do this anymore. I’m sorry. Goodbye.

                                                                                                                                                  Yours  Frankie

Gerard collapsed on the floor sobbing and screaming. The pain was tearing up his chest like a knife. Frank loved him. But it was too late. His love was gone. He won’t ever come back. Mikey kneeled next to him and Gerard collapsed in his brother’s chest. He wanted to scream He wanted to die along with Frankie. Life wasn’t worth it without him. “NO! NO! NOT MY FRANKIE! NOT MY FRANKIE! TAKE ME NOT HIM! NOT HIM!” he shouted at nobody in particular. “Shh it’s going to be okay..” Mikey hugged his brother who was now falling apart in front of him. “No it’s not going to be fucking okay! He is not coming back! Not now, not ever!” Gerard shouted. Mikey tried to let go of Gerard but he just hugged tighter. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I don’t want to lose you too, please don’t leave me..” Gerard clung onto his brother. “I don’t want to lose you..” he mumbled. Ray kneeled next to them and hugged them both.

The Way brothers spent the night cuddled up to each other, just like they did when Gerard came to Mikey’s bed because he thought there were monsters under his bed when they were little.

And on the other day the early morning newspaper arrived with shocking news.

“GERARD WAY COMMITS SUICIDE”