Storm Chaser // JJ Maybank

31

JJ and I are headed to the jail to see John B. He has some grand plan to get John B out. Even though I told him not to, JJ is still acting like a tool. He has his headphones blaring as we walk in.

"We're here to see John B Routledge," JJ tells the officer at the desk.

"No music, and get rid of the toothpick," the officer tells him.

"I can't hear what you're saying, man, all right? These things are on full blast. That's what I said. We're here to see John B Routledge," JJ says rather loudly. The man gestures for him to take the headphones off and get rid of the toothpick. "Wait. Music?" The guy nods. "Oh!" JJ takes the headphones off. "I mean, I thought it was a free country and all, but, uh, I guess you don't like freedom very much, now do you, cupcake?"

The guy grabs JJ and pushes him into the wall. Deputy Plumb walks into the room and laughs.

"Uh, not worth it," Plumb tells the guy.

"Good to see you, Plumb." JJ takes the toothpick out of his mouth. "Just nice to have something in your mouth. You know?"

"Yeah. Take off your hat and both of you empty your pockets," Plumb tells us.

"Yes, ma'am," JJ tells her.

After we empty our pockets Plumb leads us down the hallway towards a room where John B is sitting at a table. I jump when an inmate pounds the glass on his cell door.

"Hey! Why don't you come in here?"

"Five minutes," Plumb tells us.

JJ and I sit down at the table in front of John B. JJ sighs and then they both laugh.

"I thought it was gonna be me," JJ says with a laugh.

"I did too," John B says.

JJ keeps laughing. "It was you."

"Welcome to my humble abode," John B tells us.

"Yeah, when you said you had a new apartment, I had no idea," JJ says.

"Yeah, it's, uh..." John B trails off.

"It's cozy," I tell him.

"Yeah, you could say that," John B remarks.

"A little aluminum theme," JJ jokes.

"Yeah. I like to go for the cold, dark..." John B trails off.

"Alone kinda theme," JJ says.

"...depressing..." John B continues.

"Yeah, yeah. Look, I would love to sit and chitchat, but I'm on the clock. And I'm here for one reason only, okay?" JJ tells John B. "Operation liberation, baby."

"Oh boy. Here we go," John B remarks.

"I know. I know. Hear me out, though. Hear me out," JJ tells him. "Step one, piss off the cops so badly they don't see what's coming." JJ waves as a cop walks by the room. "Check. Step two, at exactly 11 p.m. this evening, you're going to have an attack of acute appendicitis."

"Do you even know what appendicitis is?" John B asks.

"Yeah," JJ assures. John B awaits for him to elaborate. "Remember eighth grade? Algebra final?"

"Jesus Christ," John B remarks.

"Worked like a charm, okay?" JJ reminds him. "Now, to sell it, you gotta actually look sick, though, okay? You got some of that ghost face sunblock in here?"

"JJ, I'm in jail," John B reminds him. "I have... a... a block of soap. That's it."

"Is it white?" JJ asks.