Taking power

Part 5 - journeys

*

It was like nothing he had ever seen. His years of wandering, of learning and of searching had not prepared him for such  affronting power.

Are we not all things?

The voice, his voice, taunted him with the memory of a younger, innocent Alina. Her dark hair and eyes like stars. Her pure light. 

That Alina was gone, and the new one was filled with a different sort of glow. He watched her emerge as she stood, eyes black as the shadows that curled around her, and threw the cut towards him.

Over and over again.

And when he though she had reached her limit, felt it through their tether, her hands began to glow with a grisly red. It was all Alexander could do to block this new wave of power. He was forced to draw on almost all of his shadows to protect himself against her relentless attacks. And so when he saw the rest of Alina's band of deserters escape he could do nothing but let them go. Those who had turned her mind from him, starting from Bagrah, taken what was his, let go. Yet somehow it felt like it was worth it as he turned to watch her eyelids flutter in sleep. Why did his anger dissipate at the thought of her, why couldn't he hate her? They were in his carriage, again.

His murderer. His equal. Perhaps now more than ever.

**

Alina woke to a gentle swaying of a carriage and the familiar smell of leather, feeling the weight of a kefta draped over her. She turned, still caught between dreams and reality, to nestle her face into something soft and... warm. Her dreams were still fresh on her mind, the picture of Mal's dying face floating just out of reach. So she stayed for a little bit longer to bask in the warmth and to forget the world she no longer wanted to see.

That was until a cool voice broke the silence. 'I know you're not asleep'

She pulled her head up then very quickly indeed. Still rubbing the bleariness from her eyes, Alina saw that she wasn't alone in the too familiar carriage. Sitting opposite was Ivan, his face scarred with two ridged black lines that ran the length of his face. Another to add to her list of the resurrected. And adjacent, whom she had just nestled into, the darkling sat, back straight and eyes firmly on her.

'Don't mind Ivan, Alina' He said, with the overbearing pride only he could exude. Showing off, she realised. After everything that had happened, what she had done to him, he still couldn't resist flaunting his power over her.

She cringed back against the walls of the carriage, and turned instead to the eerily quiet heartrender. Alina's eyes narrowed and she was soberly reminded of her clever prince and the monster he had become at the darklings cruel hand. Where was he now? Probably in a better place than her she thought bitterly.

'Why would i mind? You remind me of your inability to keep me on Sturmhonds ship' She said , smirking. 'Thanks for the hope i guess'

'The boy king and his lackeys aren't here to save you Alina. I wa...'

He was interpreted as Alina felt the anger rise once more. Burning red. 'He would have been a better king than you'll ever be'

'Would have...? Given up so soon have we Alina?'

Alina stopped. 'I... No. Of course not'

He chuckled, deep and real, his eyes glassing over and nodded to his stubbornly constant heartrender. Ivan left, leaving just the two of them in the darklings carriage.

Safe to say Alina was thoroughly stumped by the darklings joy. Was that was it was?

There was a long silence as Alina was lost in her thoughts. Why had she lived, why had he lived? And what was happening to her now, this anger, the way she felt at home in the shadows? And most importantly why was he so damn smug about it all?

'Ask, Alina.' He said reaching out to cup her face, bringing it to face him and not the void she seemed intent on peering into.

She didn't want to though. It would bring too much back. Images of Mal and Alexander's blood soaked bodies already threatened to spill over. So she turned away to break his stare, and hide the tears that had made her eyes sting.

'I... cant' She replied after some time.

'You have to'

'Fine' She said, tears spilling down her flushed cheeks. 'take one more thing from me. You've taken everything else anyway'

'Alina.' He started, his voice turned soft. 'It always had to be this way. Like calls to like. What's yours has always been mine'

'No. Mal is my like. She cried. 'Was. I cut you out when i...'

He only looked at her with sorrow.

'When will you stop lying to yourself. I thought we were past this.' He said, closing the gap between them. 'Our power doesn't stop with death and neither do we. You crossed it, on the fold; Merzost. We're in this for life. Together now more than ever.' He waited until her hiccuping sobs had slowed. 'And you knew that didn't you'

Alina didn't want to look but now the images wouldn't stop. 

She's there, watching herself kneeling over the pool of blood Mal lie in. She watches as his power pour into her and then into Alexander as she takes his life too. She watches herself, hands soaked in the blood of both men, sobbing, trembling and more broken than she ever thought possible. Her heart wrenches at the thought and she begins to turn away but just as the image begins to disappear two strong hands clasp around her shoulders, pushing her back to watch. Alexander here too, seeing her so broken she can barely breathe.But this is where she dies isn't it? The only part she has left to play. 

Except when the blood stained girl she watches finally collapses her hands find not Mal's but his.

 Alina watches, eyes widening as she does so, as the girl starts glowing again, blood and shadows alike drawing into her hands and seeping through the cracks in her palms.

Like calls to like.

When her body starts to convulse with the insurge of power and she finally lets it all out, light and shadow both, it's no surprise that her hands are clasped tightly around Alexander's, not Mal's.

Alina pulled back, hiding her trembling hands in the kefta that had been placed her during her sleep. Black. She shrugged out of it quickly, folding her arms around herself herself and felt the shake of them underneath her arms. Waves of guilt flooded in, powerful surges that made her stomach cramp up and her chest tighten. What had she done?

With frightened doe eyes Alina moved to face Alexander. It hurt to look into his eyes but she did it all the same. He was watching her with a fervent look and underneath, something that looked almost like fear. Alina ignored it, seeing only the monster he presented to everyone but her.

'What was that?' She spat. 'What did you do to me? Was it not enough that you have me here?.'

'Alina...'.

'No. You don't get to talk your way out of this one. You did this. That wasn't me. I would never choose you Alexander, become you' She said. 'You are irredeemable'

He flinched. It was a low blow and she knew it.

'Alina' He tried again.

'What.' Was the reply, her voice taught with anger.

'Your burning.'

Alina looked down to see her skin glowing with an alabaster fire, her hands dripping in crimson and black cracks running through it all. Burning he had said. Except this felt like suffocating and smoke was pulling her under. She looked for his face in the glow but he was already gone, leaving her alone.

It wasn't long before Ivan stepped back in and Alina felt her heartbeats slow and her mind grow numb. She curled up on the soft leather, leaning her head on the plush carriage walls but sleep didn't come. Only a empty dullness settled over her as she watched the fields roll by, on their way to a destination she hoped they'd never get to.