Dark and Hercules' Bizarre Adventure

Chapter III: Thriller

"FUCK!!!" yelled Dark. "Where are the cameramen! The crew! Everyone!"

"Oh, hey, John," smiled Hercules.

"Why... didn't you use your Stand...?" panted Dark. "Now... WE'RE FUCKIN' STUCK HERE!!!" he woged into an Aswang in rage.

"Chill, dude," said Hercules.

"Hello, gentlemen," said Miguel, squinting his eyes and approaching the pair, who are strapped in chairs.

"You're the user of the legendary Star Platinum," said Dark. "You killed my father... I never thanked you."

"Save the gratitude for later. I'm trying to recruit you two to battle against the President of the United States of America," said Miguel.

"The... President?" asked Dark.

"Yes... Mr. President," said Miguel.

"Why the hell do you want us to commit treason?" asked Dark.

"Love?" smiled Hercules.

"Oh! Is this about your weird five worlds, one nation thing?" asked Dark. "Tom Cruise didn't like your ideas, so I can't trust you. Neither does the United States of America since you're trying to destroy the concept of nationalism and the American economy."

"Grimms stopped hunting Cryptids. Cryptid crimes lessened. Racial injustice lessened. Poverty, world hunger, corruption, territorial disputes, religious disputes... every known problem was solved."

"You made more problems, JoJo-..."

"These problems are what I'm trying to fix now, Dark. We can do it. I believe that we can be better."

Note: Cryptids are creatures introduced from my other book. They are humans that can transform into monstrous animal-like humanoids. Grimms, meanwhile, are those with abilities that allow them to police the Cryptids, created by God.

"Okay... what's in it for us so we'd join your little task force?" asked Dark.

"Uh... New lives in Maharlica?"

"HAHAHAHA!!!" laughed the pair.

"We have no lives!" laughed Hercules.

"You have to be smarter than that, JoJo."

"I did solve the drug problem by legalizing drugs but upping the legal age for drugs," said Miguel.

"Where do we sign?" asked Dark, looking all serious.

"Get a load of this guy!" laughed Hercules, pointing to Dark and looking at Miguel.

"He's on my side, Carl Hees," said Miguel. "So... yeah... I got the load."

"BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" laughed Dark. "HE FUCKIN' SAID IT!!! HE FUCKING... AHAHAHAHA!!!"

The pair laugh hysterically.

"I don't know why we're laughing..." laughed Hercules,

"You get an infinite supply of nuggets," said Dark, pointing to Hercules.

"I'm in," replied Hercules.

"Alright, Teenage Frankenstein!" yelled Dark, wearing a black ragdoll mask, black bowler hat, black trench coat, red polo, black tie, black pants, and black shoes as he warped his katana out. "Where the hell is the microphone that I let you borrow?"