49. Talk

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TW/CW: Trauma mention, Talk of Trauma, Cheating mention.


Quackity stared at Sapnap, an uneasy feeling flooding through him. He didn't trust that tone of voice, maybe it wasn't something serious but... "Y-Yeah? About..?" he mumbled, sweat dripping down his cheek slowly. "Well uh, I think we should talk about it in my room so that.. y'know, its more private." Sapnap responded, glancing away briefly.

Sapnaps room? I mean, he supposed it was more soundproofed than his, okay, it was probably something serious, its fine, its nothing to worry about.. Right? Okay, don't get worked up. Quackity took a deep breath in, smiling tightly and nodding. Sapnap closed the door behind him and began walking to his room, Quackity following behind him.

They entered his room, Sapnap once more closing the door behind them. Quackity sad on the bed, Sapnap to the left of him. Sapnap cleared his throat. "So, first- here..." He grabbed a beanie from the bag, handing it to Quackity. Quackity blinked, smiling lightly as he grabbed it, putting it on. "Thanks Sap.." he murmured.

"No problem." Sapnap looked at his feet, kicking them lightly as they hung off the side of the bed. Quackity stared at him awkwardly, deciding to speak up after a minute had passed. "Uh Sapnap? I also have something to talk about but maybe you should speak first.." he mumbled, averting his gaze when Sapnaps eyes drifted over to him again.

"You're right, sorry, I just don't want to overstep your boundaries.. y'know?" Sapnap murmured, looking down at his feet again. Quackity blinked, wait, what did he mean by that? "What do you mean by that..?" He asked, voicing his thoughts almost immediately. Sapnap sighed, meeting eye contact with him once more.

"So, while I was out buying stuff Karl sent me a text.. or two." Quackitys eyes widened, what did Karl send him? was it about what he told him about? Was it fake stuff? If so, why was Sapnap believing him? He did still love him, he knew it- wait- stop overthinking stop, stop just ask him what it was- "What... What did he text you a-about?" Good.

Sapnap pressed his lips together, clutching his thighs before continuing. "He told me that you talked to him about your trauma and stuff... And- and uh, he- told me not to talk to you about it but I just- I just wanted to make sure it was true, if you know what I.. mean by that?" Quackity gulped, nodding slowly.

"So... Is it? Did... Did all of that happen to you?" Sapnap asked, his voice quiet. Quackity opened his mouth, finding a loss for words. It was true, but it was so hard to actually say it was, for some reason. Why couldn't he say it? He nodded, hoping that would be enough to signal it was true.

Sapnap frowned, looking at Quackity sadly. "So... We also made it worse huh.. I- I'm sorry, I should've noticed. I always have been kind of an idiot when it came to people I care about.." Sapnap mumbled, sighing as guilt ran through him. "N-No- it- it's not your fault I... I should've told you... I'm just... too much of a pussy, I guess." Quackity muttered, his voice fading out as he finished his sentence.

"What? No. Alex you- you can't... say stuff like that. You can't tell what you're comfortable with, because of Schlatt right? It's not your fault." Sapnap placed his hand on Quackitys softly, lightly squeezing it and hoping he could offer some sort of comfort. Quackity bit his lip to keep it from trembling, looking down and avoiding eye contact. Why was it so hard to keep eye contact with his boyfriend?

"Alex, look at me... Please?" Sapnap asked, his voice soft. Quackity hesitantly looked back up at him, having to keep himself from immediately looking away again. "Alex, I really love you.. I'm not upset or anything I just.. I wish you would've told me sooner so I could've helped... and avoided what happened." Sapnap murmured, reaching a hand up and cupping Quackitys cheek.

Quackity could feel himself tearing up. No, not now... He... Can he cry? It wouldn't be bad.. would it? "I- I just- it's so hard to tell p-people cause you're scared they- they'll judge you a-and-" Quackity stuttered, a tear running down his cheek and dripping from his chin.  Sapnap frowned, pulling him into a hug softly. "Alex..."

"I-I just didn't want to be a bother to you guys- I just- I didn't want to ruin anything- I didn't want to get in the way o-or seem annoying because it- it just wont go away I can't- I can't escape it but I'm t-trying so hhhard but it just-" he buried his face in Sapnaps chest, fearful to look up at the face of the one he loved most right now.

"I-I'm sorry I don't- I don't want to rant rright n-now I- D-did- did Karl tell you ev-everything?" he sniffled, wrapping his arms around Sapnap. "Well.. I- I wouldn't know for sure but it seemed to be most of it, at least..." Sapnap uttered, pulling Quackity closer whilst rubbing his back. Quackity nodded, refusing to look up as he continued to cry.

He oddly felt safer than usual, he felt safe. He didn't want to move, or really talk anymore. He did originally, but somehow that need has disappeared. He thought something else was going to be talked about originally because of Sapnaps tone of voice, but he supposes this isn't as bad. It did seem like Sapnap wanted to ask about something else, but right now he just wants to feel loved, so he pushed all of his thoughts away, for once.

He pressed his face deeper into the warmth of Sapnaps chest.

...

Sapnap was always so warm, it was nice.

It always felt so calming...

Safe.

Sapnap felt safe.

He liked that...

Maybe it'd turn out better.


...


They stayed like this a bit longer, Sapnap made attempts a few more times to start up the conversation again, but it was made clear Quackity just wanted... Comfort? That or cuddles right now. Probably both.

Sapnap sighed, though smiled at Quackity as the other seemed to melt in his embrace. He was cute, Sapnap always thought he was. He never would've thought they'd end up in a relationship, though. Not like he was complaining, why would he?

He has a handsome boyfriend, one that wont cheat on him. Why would he want anything else?

His smile faltered, but quickly returned as his gaze once more focused on the smaller man trapped in his embrace. He blushed, giving a soft kiss on the others head as he rubbed his lower back.

He did still like Karl, but not as much as he loved Quackity. Karl was the one that initiated everything, which was horrible in more ways than one.

They could just keep Karl as a friend, if Quackity ever gets to that point.

Sapnap doesn't know if they'd ever fully forgive him, though.











Ugh my nose burns
(Unrelated but it does)
Colds suck :/// I just
Wanna write man

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