57. Taking A Break

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[] Chapter TWs: Very briefly mentioned abuse (not Sapnap overthinkers🙄/lh) []

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"Uh... Sapnap..?" Quackity mumbled, just barely getting the man's attention with how quiet his voice was. Sapnap looked at him, tearing his eyes off of the tv, smiling. "Yeah Q?" Quackity looked at him, and frowned, more guilt welling up inside of him due to how happy Sapnap looked. He didn't want to disappoint him or make him sad...

But he just... really can't deal with a relationship right now. He might ruin things... He needs to work on himself.. And that's okay.. right? But what if it's not? His frown grew, and he watched as the smile on Sapnap's face dropped slightly, bit by bit. "Quackity?"

Quackity pressed his lips together, taking a slow breath in. "Can.. Can we talk?" he asked, nervously, his hands fidgeting with themselves. Sapnap frowned worriedly, his hand moving and pausing the tv, turning his full attention onto Quackity. "Of course, is something wrong..?" Quackity looked into Sapnap's eyes, fearful of what his reaction would be.

"I.. not... I mean, kind of..." Quackity managed to get out, averting his eyes and looking at his own lap, too afraid to look into the eyes of the person he loved most currently. The person he was planning to take a break with romantically because of his own problems. He sighed shakily, a lump forming in his throat and preventing him from talking.

"Well, what's wrong..?" Sapnap asked, reaching out and grabbing his hand softly, trying to be reassuring. Quackity looked up at him, swallowing and opening his mouth to speak.

"I- I think.. we.. need to-" he cut himself off and looked down once more, unable to get it out. He frowned, biting the inside of his lip and tearing up slightly. This is just like what happened a while back...

"Hey Sapnap?" Sapnap looked over at him, raising an eyebrow. "Yeah Quackity?" Quackity took a deep breath, forming together words. Though, when he tried to speak, nothing came out. "Quackity are you alright?" Sapnap asked, concern lacing his voice. Quackity nodded, once more trying to get the words out. 'Karl is cheating on you' just a simple sentence, right? But.. "Nothing... Nevermind, it's nothing Sapnap." He forced a smile, watching as Sapnap slowly turned back to the tv, a look of worry still displayed on his face.

"Hey- hey, what's wrong??" Sapnap asked, clearly very worried as he wiped a tear from Quackity's face, cupping his cheek. Quackity sniffled, cupping a hand over Sapnaps and looking away, unable to look him in the face.

"I- I really think we need t-to- to take- a..-" Quackity hiccupped, refusing to let Sapnap hug him or get closer as he desperately tried to get the words out. "Take a what..?-" Sapnap asked, one hand cupping Quackity's cheek and the other holding his hand. "We-"

"We need to take a break!" Quackity finally blurted out, his eyes squeezed shut as the words left his mouth. He kept his eyes shut, fearfully thinking of the worst as Sapnaps hand drifted from his cheek, the other loosening around his hand. "..W-What..?" Sapnap whispered, his voice slightly disbelieving.

"I- Just c-cant be in a relationship right- right now, I can't- I-" Quackity stuttered out, letting go of Sapnap's hands and curling into himself defensively, scared Sapnap would hit him for pushing him away. Wait- why would he hit him? But he still might yell at him.

"Quackity..." Sapnap murmured, his voice barely reaching Quackity as the man curled into himself, hiding his face in his arms. "I-I'm sorry I- I just- It's not you I swear! I- I.. It- it's me, I have- I'm messed up I can't- I'm sorry!"

Sapnap reached out a hand and placed it on Quackity's head softly, wincing internally when Quackity flinched and tensed up, presumably expecting a smack or something. "Quackity, I'm..." Sapnap looked away slightly, not able to stop himself from tearing up. "I'm not mad at you.." he mumbled softly.

Quackity looked up from his arms, frowning at Sapnap, tears running down his cheeks. "I.. I s-swear it.. It's not- not you.. I- I really, really l-love you I just-" "Shh.. I know... It's okay I..." Sapnap interrupted and sighed, looking into his eyes sadly. "I understand..." Quackity frowned, opening his mouth to say something, but stopping when Sapnap cupped his chin softly, hesitantly.

"But can.. can I have one kiss before we.. you know... take a break..?" He asked, carefully, not planning on forcing Quackity to do anything. Quackity looked at him, nodding slowly, his cheeks dusted a light red colour. "Okay.. but.. a-after that..-" "I know..." Sapnap sighed, smiling softly and leaning forward, his lips connecting with Quackity's gradually.

He closed his eyes, the kiss soft and dragged out, Sapnap relishing in the moment, as neither he or Quackity knew when the break would be over. Quackity reached up, cupping his cheeks and kissing him back, albeit hesitantly, before gradually pushing him away, an apologetic look in his eyes.

"Sapnap.. I'm-" Quackity started, once more getting shushed by Sapnap. "Don't apologize, Q.. It's.. not your fault..." he murmured, his hand leaving Quackitys face, as the distance between them on the couch grew just slightly. Sapnap picked up the remote, smiling at Quackity, though it was clear there was a bit of pain in the smile.

"Now,, uh... want to finish that movie?" he asked, watching as Quackity's eyes scanned his face sadly, before the man rubbed his eyes, wiping the tears from his face and turning to face the tv, nodding in response. Sapnap turned and unpaused the movie, sitting back a bit awkwardly as he and Quackity finished the movie.

Quackity frowned.

He felt so guilty, maybe he shouldn't have done that..

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[] A/N []
[ Quackity feeling guilty because he needs to take a break from a relationship for his own mental health be like: ]
[ Anyway hope you all enjoyed this chapter! Will try to get another out shortly ^^ ]

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