In your arms

Chapter 11: a sudden surprise

Riley's POV:

I sit at the kitchen island with my phone in my hand waiting for Emily. I've decided to take a test just so my sister can stop pushing me to do so. She's not stopped all afternoon so she offered to run and by a test and I'm just waiting for her to return which is way to nerve racking.
I glance down at my phone to check the time only to notice it's only been 2 minutes since I last checked. I have to much on my plate. It's currently 6:46 and Em should be back any minute and then she offered to take me to a pizza place for dinner and a bar after but Alfie will be waiting at the air port at 10 so if we stay out past then and I'm late I doubt he'll be happy about it.

I feel my foot quite tap fast and it's like I can hear my heart beat getting louder and louder every passing second. Until I hear the door open in which I drop my phone on the island and run up to the door.
"Did u get one?" I ask trying to calm myself down a little before people get suspicious, we decided to both spend the night at mine and James so my parents wouldn't know i may be pregnant.

"Yes I did, here" she hands me the box and I immediately take it from her and walk off to the bathroom. The quicker this is done I can tick it of my list of worries. I hear slow footsteps following me until they stop and I hear Em sit down on the sofa. I speed up and then slam the bathroom door shut.

After I've completed every instruction on the test box I close the lid to the test and walk out to meet my sister who is sat on the sofa with a cup of coffee, I have no idea how she made that in such little amount of time but I push it aside and place the test upside down on the table while sitting next to her.

"Could u please move that coffee out my face, it doesn't help" I sigh pushing the had with the mug out of the way. She nods slightly and places it on the table.
"Calm down Ri your gonna be fine" she soothes.

I'm grateful for my sister, I really am, but I know that no matter how much she try's to calm me down tonight I won't work because for once in my life I can't trust her words. I know that it's not gonna be fine. Even if this test is negative I still have to leave Toronto today without saying any sort of goodbye, I feel like I'm gonna be shut away in a big fancy palace away from everyone I care about, no ones gonna know where I am and I can't tell them. And if this comes back positive. God help me Alfie will kill me, I'll have to bring up James baby away from him and he probably won't know she or he exists, what if he gets mad at me and makes my life worse. This is to much pressure and no matter what pathway this test decides to give me I'll be living in some form of hell.

After 5 minutes we both stand and I cover my eyes while my sister picks up the test. She promised she wouldn't give it away until I open my eyes and find out for myself but she let out a gasp and I immediately know what it says. I open my eyes and take the test from her hands and cover my mouth in shock while I'm frozen in place.

"IM GONNA BE AN AUNTIE!" She screams while wrapping her arms around me. I'm still frozen in place with the test in one hand until the tension leaves and everything in my body loosens causing tears to fall. I can't figure out if there happy tears or sad tears but I'm leaning towards sad and maybe a little happy.

I suppose that's done. It's official. Weather James knows or not he has a baby. This is gonna be the hardest thing I'll have to deal with in my life. I'm overwhelmed with emotions I'm happy that my first baby is with James and I'm excited to have my own child wondering around, I'm surprised at the fact I got pregnant so easily, I'm scared of what's gonna happen when it starts to be clear that I'm pregnant because I won't be able to hide it forever, and I'm sad at the fact that this baby will grow up without knowing his or her real father.

"Ri don't cry it's ok. James will be home in around a week and then you can tell him! I'm sure he will be over the moon" she says rubbing my back softly. I don't know when but we're now sat on the sofa and I'm lead on the sofa hugging my knees while staring at the table with the test on and Emily's sat by my feet. It's clearly visible that I'm upset but the tears aren't flowing as fast as before.

"I guess.." I force a weak smile and break over my words. I know that that's not gonna happen but I can't let Emily catch on.
So after a while of sitting in silence she sends me upstairs to change, which I change into a short dark blue flowery dress and a denim jacket, and put a little bit of makeup on, using the makeup James brought me for my last birthday which I don't use very often, I grabbed my purse and we both went to the pizza place down the street from the studio that has just opened. I tried to convince Emily to drive since I'm probably not gonna come home if we stay out to late but she said she would be drinking more than me so I ended up driving because although I may never see her again I don't need my sister dying.

note from the future: I'm now starting to realise that maybe only waiting 3 days isn't probably the most accurate but I kinda wanted to get to that point before she left. So ya🙃😂