In your arms

Chapter 18: im doing this for you

Riley's POV:

While I get dragged out of the room to eat breakfast. My morning sickness caused me to be on the bathroom floor throwing up so Alfie's pretty much forcing me to eat. I sit down at W huge table placed in what seems like could be a whole fucking ball room, this place I feel like gets bigger and bigger and it's getting a bit overwhelming, the plates and cutlery are real gold and silver. I definitely do not fit in with these people. I'm sat her in a hoodie and jeans while their wearing suits and dresses. Although his family are nice to me it's just not the same. I feel like I've lost my place in my life, and I can't do anything to get it back.

"So Riley, how are you? You haven't talked much" his mother asks softly. I don't reply straight away as I contemplate what to say. I soon feel a pain against my shin so I just lie completely. "I'm good, don't even worry bout it" I lie. Sighing at my own words my memories from Toronto come rushing back. I remember the countless times James has told me 'don't even worry about it' which half of the time causes me to worry more. A let a small smile cross my face as I remember the time he dragged me out of my house and drove me to watch the sunset. I asked continuously where are we going but he just replied in his cool manner "don't even worry bout it". We then spent the night sat on the beach while staring up at the stars. The moment was so raw and genuine that it made me realise just how much I love him and he loves me. Just being sat there with a blanket while i lean on his shoulder. No loud noises, no distraction, no alcohol, no food no nothing. Just us and the sun.

The smile remains on my face before I feel something brush against my thigh. I snap back out of my day dream and shift uncomfortably in my seat. Instead of it stopping I feel, what I figured out was Alfie's hand, move higher up. I wince as he passes on of my cuts but doesn't stop his hand from moving. I shift again trying to get him to stop but I put doesn't work. Though I can't tell him, he's completely oblivious to the fact that I feel so uncomfortable, he's just talking over to his parents with his hand pretty much at the top of my thigh.

I can feel tears starting to build up in the corner of my eyes as his hand goes higher and moves from my thigh completely. I can't do anything as his family's right there but I can't just sit here silent either.

I don't know what to do. My tears threaten to spill but I try push them back. The feeling doesn't stop and one blinks causes tears to spill. I gain looks from everyone at the table. He finally moves his hand when he realise so it looks like he wasn't doing anything.

"Riley, love what's up?" I wipe the few tears that had fallen and try convince them I'm ok, but they don't buy it, I feel stuck. I can't say the truth otherwise I won't live it down. But they can see I'm clearly lieing.

"I just miss my home" I say not really thinking, I mean it is the truth, I do miss Toronto a lot and everyone there. I think I got them to believe me until they shot me confused looks. I look around the table to see they all have that puzzled expression except Alfie. Who looks like he wants to hit me.

"Miss your what? Hun, where are you from? Alfie said you live here in Switzerland" after I realise that they must not of known that I'm from Canada a worried feeling rushes over me. What the fuck do I say. Though Alfie seems angry enough so if I say the truth I doubt it would change the reaction I get later. I avoid making eye contact and use my fork to poke my food.

"I'm from Ontario Canada" I sigh. I've just dug myself a massive hole that I don't think I'll be able to get out of. I hear a few gasps but I ignore it.

"So what made you want to come to Switzerland then?" One of his family members ask. I shrug slightly but still reply so I don't sound rude. "It's not like I had a choice, no offence of anything" I sigh. They soon bounce off the topic of me and start questioning Alfie about why he lied. I only half listen in while I daydream about my life in Toronto again. Though I'm soon snapped out of it as Alfie gets up to leave whispering something before that sends my anxiety crazy.