Warning: sexual nature
Chapter two
At first, I thought love was just a chemical reaction - a desperate desire for purpose overloading your senses to believe love actually existed. However, when I looked into Matthews' eyes I saw myself falling into this warm chocolate-like pool. Huh, Tristan's eyes are the complete opposite. I shook my head, now was not the time to be thinking about Tristan!
When his arms went either side of my head, slowly lowering his mouth to meet mine, I thought for a moment there were sparks. The lights were out, I could only see parts of his muscular frame that were highlighted from the hallway light seeping in from the crack under the bedroom door as his hand began to wander, quickly going from my breasts to my lady parts. A place I was very insecure about as I jolted. "You OK?" Matthew asked, with concern and annoyance laced in his voice. I nodded. "Yeah, sorry. It's just hard to show it all, ya'know?" I said, laughing it off as he nodded, continuing. His finger traced the opening, slightly teasing as I gasped – only ever fully touching myself, despite the fear I had of feeling my own vagina. My mind was restless with desire and doubt, something in the back of my mind ached at me to wait a while, yet I ignored it as we continued; but when Matthews' mouth teased mine open and his tongue touched mine - I melted.
Matthew quickly became impatient as he slipped a finger inside, surprising me at the sensation. Not knowing how to act, I kissed him again. Hoping for my mind to ease and to distract it. He kissed back as I felt another enter slowly rocking them in and out for a few moments, his breath mingled with mine a while, both unsure on how to act next.
"You ready?" He asked, panting slightly as he arched over me, the duvet discarded on the floor. I nodded, internally questioning if I was wet enough for him to enter. Trusting Matthew, I followed his lead as he put my legs on either side of his waist, pulling me closer as my head fell from the pillows. I could feel it, a soft perk of skin radiating heat stopped just at the edge of my entrance. His chest glistened with beads of sweat as he used his fingers to separate my lady lips, rubbing his member seductively against the slit. Matthew pushed more inside, a strange urgency beckoned at me to pause as I felt him enter, stretching me. I thought it would be just pleasure, with a little pain. I didn't expect to feel much more than that. I was wrong.
Feeling him enter gave me pleasure after a while, my lady parts struggling to keep up with making a natural lubricant as I felt myself start to dry. I thought quickly, of every inappropriate thought I've ever had to help speed up the process. I was wet and ready for the ride within moments. As more pushed in, I could feel myself tense and wanting to stop. "Matthew?" He paused looking at me. "You're so tight, it'll hurt for a little." I nodded, looking to the pillows beside me as he continued, I bit my lip to stop the yelps. It'll be over soon, then it'll feel nice.
Once Matthew was all the way in, I felt myself throb at his size, glad he was under average. He began thrusting slowly, the pain subsiding a little with the distraction. "See, I told you." I looked at Matthew, shyly peeking in-between us – there was something enticing about looking at a foreign object entering you and having their way. My control of what was happening felt as if it had been erased as I watched and felt the movement become faster – a dull ache crossed the right side of my stomach, earning a small pained and pleasurable moan from me. I had experimented before with pain, finding I quite enjoyed it.
In a way, I could clearly remember his hazel eyes – they weren't looking at me, but rather through me as I felt the heat inside echo off my walls. A panic came with the realization of what just happened, however I looked to Matthew who seemed nonchalant on the fact that his semen was currently rummaging inside unannounced. He slumped beside me, breathing deeply with his arm draped across my stomach. I looked at his clammed-up skin; a slight glimmer coated his hair from his head to his privates. I felt the urge to push the foreign liquid out, moving slightly across the bed – uncomfortable. I wasn't sure what to do as Matthew stood from the bed a few moments later, pulling his grey tight UnderArmour boxers on.
I crawled around under the sheets attempting to find my belongings and grabbed my discarded 'sexy' panties – to which Matthew took no notice. Pulling them on, I quickly grabbed my shorts– doing the same, still under the sheets. A few seconds had passed as Matthew stood still in the middle of his room, tapping on his mobile while I placed my shirt on looking at him. "Matthew?" I asked, worried.
"Mmm, yeah?" He replied, turning around with a smile – my heart melted. "Nothing." - I was content as he came back, wrapping his arms around me with so much warmth I questioned how any woman could have hurt and let this man go.
"Katherine?" I nodded against his chest. "I think I'm starting to fall for you." Shock was all I could feel in that moment – a hulk, practically a stranger – falling for me? A not so slim woman with confidence issues? I always thought I would end up with no one, let alone this hulk of a man. I felt like I was on cloud nine as I turned to look at Matthew, it was dark but I could see the outline of his features. His nose was perfectly shaped like a soft triangle and his lips were red from the glass of wine he had before he met me. The hazel eyes I've started to adore were safely hidden behind his olive-toned eyelids.
Oh, he's asleep.
I sat up, feeling his liquid slowly seep into my pants, a small panic came over me as I squeezed my legs shut, slightly disgusted. Shuffling out of the bed, I found my way to the door, opening it as quietly as I could – my hand covering my lady parts over my shorts just in case any leaked through.
I sat on the cold white seat of the toilet, warmth dripping out – a smell coming from it. I nearly gagged at the strength of it, it was like chlorine mixed with nail polish remover; I held my nose using the toilet paper to quickly get rid of his semen. Pulling my pants back up, the wet patch now cold I shivered deciding to have a smoke. His pack of cigarettes was still on the side as I took one and the blue lighter, walking out the kitchen and onto the small iron cast balcony.
It was freezing as I stepped out, fairy lights wrapped around the black bar of the iron railing – giving me enough light to see. Flicking the lighter, a flame flew out quickly lighting my cigarette. I breathed it out greatfully. My mind flicked back to Matthews' small confession – did he mean it? Probably not.
A part of me however, wanted so badly to believe it. I looked to my left, seeing Matthews' window slightly ajar. Outside the flats you could see a pub on the corner and a long curvy road, the night becoming misty, the only noise was the music from said pub – a few people drunkenly singing an old Irish song I knew outside.
I laughed, imagining my life with Matthew. I couldn't help it, I felt so lucky – what if we had a kid? What should we call him? It should be after his dad... Frank Ethan Moore. That has a nice ring to it. I was getting way over my head, I knew that as I shook myself, smoking the last of my cigarette and stamping it out. I sighed, regardless of how much I wanted to stay near Matthew, there's no saying he honestly felt the same.
Maybe I'm just a quick fuck? Knowing my luck, probably.
YOU ARE READING
HE IS HELL
General FictionBASED ON TRUE EVENTS. CONTAINS: DOMESTIC ABUSE, RAPE, A MIX OF EMOTIONS, SUICIDE AND RECOVERY. I had spent 4 years living my adolescent life with my abuser. What started out as my dream man, ended with me being diagnosed with PTSD, temporary amnes...