His Burden, His Blessing

Petty Queen

I drove my car back home while Zeyansh drove his. As I drove home, I thought about what happened at the party.

Siddharth!

A weird man!

A man that made me forget my sorrows and worries, even if it was just for a while.

I laughed a little as I thought back to our dance. He wasn't kidding when he said he didn't know how to dance. We both had two left feet and we were just messing around, not bothering about others.

He made me forget about my husband's wandering eyes.

And I was grateful to him for that.

***

"You seemed too close to Siddharth....

Do you know him from before?" Zeyansh asked me as we got ready for bed.

If I didn't know him or how he wasn't interested in me, I would have thought he was jealous. But I just know he wasn't and was probably just asking out of curiosity.

"No!"

Was the only thing I answered with as I laid on my side, with my back towards him, and slipped into a deep slumber.

***

It's been a week since the night of the party.

It's been a week since I and Siddarth have been texting and calling each other often.

It has also been a week since I started being cold toward Zeyansh.

I no longer try to do sweet things for him; like the notes, I've completely stopped writing him those. I don't give him goodbye kisses nor do I wish him a great day. I just place his lunch bag on the countertop and leave the house without telling him.

When I wanted him to acknowledge me, I would pack cute lunches, with much care and detail, and not just throw everything together and give him a mess. I would make sure the lunches retain their heat, don't get soggy, and is just easy for him to have. Now I just pack everything in a huge dump and give it to him.

Petty who?

But what surprised me was that he would eat everything, even if it was soggy and cold. He's even tried to start conversations but before he could get a word out, I would walk away and pretend I have work or pretend to be asleep.

For the past week, he looks like he wants to talk to me about something. Maybe he hasn't talked about it because I was pushing him away, but I didn't care!

I was tired, tired of waiting for him. I knew our relationship was doomed from the beginning, but I just hoped. Right now, I think our relationship is nearing a dead end, but I didn't want to make the first move to make the end official.

I know, it's cowardice!

Sigh

I got up from my seat, ready to go home.

***

Siddharth was coming to our home this afternoon. He said he's heard about how good my food is but never got to taste it. So he said he wanted a taste and was coming home.

I agreed because he saved me from a heck of a lot of pain that day from having to watch my husband hold another woman in his arms. And I had to pay him back for that.

Zeyansh doesn't know Sid is coming and I didn't want to tell him because that would mean I would be the first one to break the silence. I was a stubborn ass and I wasn't going to give in first.

I made chicken biryani, south Indian style with chicken 65 and raita. The whole house smelled fabulous. For dessert, I made payasam. Though it was going to be a heavy lunch for him, it was fine. Today was Sunday and he had a day off, so he can just go home and sleep however long he wanted.

"Hmm, smells so good!" Zeyansh said as he entered home from work. He had an emergency surgery in the early morning and he went to the hospital.

He went straight into the kitchen and started going through all the dishes.

"Biryani, chicken 65, payasam....

What's the occasion?" he asked me, his eyes shining bright like the Christmas lights and I bet he was also drooling.

I almost smiled when I looked at him like that, but hardened myself when I reminded myself of that awful dreaded night.

I turned away, ignoring him. I heard him sigh as he walked away. I saw his slumped back and my heart, she ached for her husband. But I had to protect her so that she doesn't hurt more in the future.

Ding Dong!

"Whose here?" Zeyansh asked.

Perfect timing!

I opened the door with a huge smile on my face. At the door, was Sid, in a white t-shirt and track pants.

He looked hot in both a tux and track pants!

"I can already smell heaven." He said as he walked in.

"Sid? What the fuck is he doing here?" Zeyansh asked himself as he looked confused and....angry?

"Hey man! What the hell are you doing in my house?" he asked Sid as he gritted his teeth.

"Sid here wanted to taste my food. So I invited him over for lunch." I told him as I grinned at Sid. I led Sid to the table.

"I bet you must be really hungry!" I told him as I served him.

"Oh, Zeyansh! Why don't you serve yourself? It's going to get cold." I told him not wanting to serve him. In response, he gave me a look of disbelief.

Whose the petty queen? I am!

Then I sat down, served for myself and we all began eating.

Sid and I talked about nothing and everything while Zeyansh stayed real quiet, his eyes on his plate.

A part of me was worried. He was always silent but before last week he at least knew that he had someone to talk to and I made sure of it every day by telling him that 'he had me to talk to about anything'.

But now....

He's well aware that I'm giving him the silent treatment.

People might say that I'm overreacting and that maybe Zeyansh was just observing his new colleague. But they didn't know, they didn't know that I know that he wasn't just observing her as his new colleague but something more.

And that hurt more than anything.

For the last two years, all I've wanted was for him to look at me the same way he looks at her. He still doesn't.

Was it because I'm not enough?

Because I don't know what else I can do to make him love and accept me as his wife!

I was pissed!

This fucker thought that he could come to my home, sit at my table and eat my wife's food?

And I hated how caring Ishaani was towards him. She served him but not me!

And that man literally finished the whole thing!

I hate him and I hate how close they look!

Ding!

I unlocked my phone to see that Tanisha had messaged me asking if the plan was still on.

Since she's new to India, she asked me if I could show her around the city and I agreed.

There's nothing wrong with helping a new colleague right?

It's only been a week since she started working at our hospital and she's already helped so much by updating the equipment and coming up with new ideas on critical surgeries.

It's only fair I help her feel comfortable and settle down here.

***

I was glad when Sid left home. But what I hated was how Ishaani and Sid interacted. They seemed too close for my liking that I find it hard to believe that they just met a week ago.

"You seem too close to Sid!" I told Ishaani as she entered the living room, cleaning up the glasses of tea that we had before he left.

"So?" she asked with an attitude.

"So?! Now you finally talk!" I said exasperatedly. She just rolled her eyes and left.

I left it at that because I am not ready to put up with her attitude.

I went to the room, intending to get ready to go meet up with Tanisha.

After I put on a white t-shirt and jeans, I was ready to hit the road.

"Where are you going?" Ishaani asked me as she came out of the kitchen.

Since she was being all bitchy, I decided to not answer her as I left the home after grabbing my car keys.