(Shopping)
Mom: What about this?
Me, absolutely dead inside with the most monotone voice: Mama. I am 13 year-old with a pixie cut. I do not need a Frozen themed hairbrush.
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Forks: *drops*
Me looking dead ahead, not moving: Why must you betray me like this?
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Me: I have decide that I will only be accepting hate in surfer dude speak
BFF: Bruh ur totally not tubular.......like quit harshing my mellow dude
Me: excellent
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(Playing Cops and Robbers)
Friend "arresting" me: You have right to remain silent
Me, smirking: I choose to waive that right
Me: *shrieks*
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(My family going to Taco Bell)
My mom: *all black but causal*
Sister: *all black but looks like she came out of a fashion ad*
Me: *all black but looks like a mix between a stagehand and a vampire*
Dad: *wear dad clothes* It's 80 degrees and we're going to a drive thru???
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Friend: *is finally reaching the end of the video that so far has taken 16 tries*
Me ruining everything: Aye Macarena! Wait no dang it- *gets tackled by them*
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Me: *turns into the 6th grade hallway to get to my math class*
*strange noise* *hears rumbling*
Sixth graders: *pouring out of classrooms like ants*
Me a freaking 8th grader: *gets trampled*
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(Walking to the buses)
Car: *starts and turns to where my BFF and I are walking*
Me, arms open wide: Try me. Do it. Freaking run me over now.
BFF: Isn't that (name of our 6th grade IRLA teacher)?
Me, arms quickly going down and ducks head: Oh god dang it please tell me it's not. I'm most definitely still your best student whose was always positive and kind please don't heard what I said
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Me bored and wanting praise: What's my quality?
BFF without hesitation: Your ability to bullshit any assignment and still get the highest grade
Me: Wha-
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4 year-old family friend: How are babies made?
Me, panicking: Doesn't matter, they don't exist anymore, haven't since 1324
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(Texting)
Chill Friend: question
Friend that vibes: shoot
Loud Friend: get down before someone gets hurt
Me: stop drop and roll, dude
BFF: where's the fire
Tired Friend: wherever the hell the fire wants to be
Me: too hot
BFF: hot dam
Friend that vibes: call the police
Loud Friend: and the fireman
(Absolutely nothing for a minute)
Me: What just happened?
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Me looking out the window: It's raining ducks and chicken
BFF: That's not even the expression-
Me smirking: Because it sure is fowl weather
BFF:
BFF: *wacks me with a broom*
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BFF introducing me to her new friends: *acting like an Indian Steve Irwin* And here we have Tanvi. Believe me when I tell you that this man, this man is the smartest idiot you will ever meet. I'm gonna poke her with a stick and watch her fall over because they're are also the weakest person you will ever meet.
YOU ARE READING
Incorrect Quotes that actually happened
CasualeJust random things that I, or someone else around have said making no sense but it's hilarious