I'm nobody's b!tch

Part 28: Holy crap we're awkward!

Jeremy seemed at a loss of words, he stared blankly at me for a moment, before his expression turned to that of a kicked puppy. I couldn't bring myself to feel bad for him though, he brought this upon himself... I turned to the officer, who glanced suspiciously at the two of us. "I see... You do realize you can end up in jail for stalking right?" the officer turned towards Jeremy, who jumped in place like a kid caught doing something bad. "I wasn't stalking him i-!" he paused when he saw the glare i was giving him, and stayed quiet. I was about to open my mouth, maybe tell the oficcer  what he had been doing to me these past years... But the look Jeremy was giving me- of desperation... He was practically begging me to stay quiet bout it, and so i found no words coming out... Luckily, none of us had to be taken to the station, and after the officer took me home, i could hear him lecture Jeremy as the two of them headed towards Jeremy's home.

The moment i entered the house i slammed into somebody. I slowly let my gaze wander upwards "Oh... Hi Silas..." i mumble awkwardly, smiling nervously. Yet Silas never returned it, in fact- he answered with a glare so harsh it could make glass crack. "Out having fun again i see?" the look he was giving me was one of disbelief and- disgust... He was disgusted with me yet again... "You think i was-!?"  I never get to finish the sentence "I know you were Kendal... I can smell him all over you!" he hissed, probably trying to avoid waking mom. "yeah? Well take your stupid nose and fuck off... And for your information- we didn't do anything... I was going for a walk, met him by chance and he tried to come on to me again... Nothing more than that..." i hiss back at him, watching him flinch at my harsh words.

"You're not lying to me now are you?" his voice is low and threatening, but his eyes can't hide the worry he's so obviously feeling. I nod "I'm not lying... You can even ask the police officer that escorted me home..." i shrug, trying to sidestep so that i could actually get past him, but Silas blocks me again "Police officer?"

i grin "Oh yeah, i screamed Jeremy's ears off in the middle of the street and the neighbourhood wasn't all too happy about it..." i yawn, my grin widening when i see a relieved one take place on Silas' features. "So he won't bother you anymore?" he almost sounded hopeful. "I can't guarantee it, but at least his parents will know about the stalking part" i sigh, leaning against the front door, now that i know that Silas won't be letting me get past him. "That's better than nothing..." Silas sighs, a small smile forming on his face as he leans forwards, resting his head on the door right above my shoulder. I pat his back "You sound like some jealous boyfriend..." i mumble, letting my hand rest there for a moment.

Silas goes quiet, probably pretending not to hear me... Sneaky little bastard... "Yeah, i do don't i?" he chuckles, snaking his arms around my neck in a sloppy hug. "Would you like me to be?" he then asks out of the blue, and i lift a brow in confusion "Be what?" Silas shifts a little, and i can sense his discomfort. There's another awkward pause, as if Silas is thinking vey carefully about how to get the words out, but finally he finishes "Your jealous boyfriend?" his grip tightens a little on me, and i'm pretty sure he's not aware of it himself. I can feel my cheeks flush and i blurt "Did you just ask me out?" i can't help the surprise in my voice, though i feel bad when Silas flinches. "I- i guess so?" he questions, sounding very unsure about himself.

I suck in a breath "I- i'm... Is this the right time for that?" i furrow my brow, and Silas pulls away just enough to be able to look me straight into the eyes "If you ask me, i think now is the best time... We can't keep going on and off like this..." he says seriously, and i nod my head in agreement. "Yeah, i guess that's true..."

"In that case i..." now i did have this internal monologue before- when i discovered my crush on him... And i did determine that i wouldn't be able to date him... But things have obviously changed since then, we've gotten closer... And i feel safe with him... Silas turns bright red "But ah... You don't have to answer right now! If you don't want to... You uh..." Silas stammers, looking away "You have a lot to think about right now... It can wait..." Silas pushes himself off of the wall, offering a small smile as he backed away, most likely to run from me. But before he could, i grabbed his sleeve "Silas..." i stare intensly at him, and he swallows. "I... I don't know if i'm ready for this..." i start, sucking in a deep breath, Silas nods "Yeah, so as i said-"

"Hold on i'm not done..." I interrupt, holding my free hand up to silence him "I don't know if i'm ready for this, but- I'm willing to try... You've been nothing but good to me lately, you deserve at least this if nothing else..." i blurt, before catching myself again "So uh... yes... I'd very much like you to be my eh... Jealous boyfriend..." i finish in a whisper, looking away awkwardly. Silas stares at me in silence for a moment "So yeah... I guess uh... I guess it's official then?" he questions, using his free hand to rub the back of his head. I nod, trying to froce down the blush that forced it's way onto my cheeks. Shit... we suck at this..."Yeah... I guess it is..." i smile awkwardly "So uh... What is it that couples do exactly?" i question, clearing my throat. Silas barks out one of those silent whisper laughs "I have absolutely no idea..." Great... So we're both clueless... Perfect... "I guess we can start by... I don't know... Cuddle or something?" i suggest, shrugging. A light pink dusts Silas' cheeks as he nods.

Silas places his arm over my shoulder awkwardly as we head back towards my room, and i still can't believe that this is actually happening... Not that it's a dream come true or anything, but when i remember how much i hated his fucking guts when i first met him- this is pretty damn unbelievable... I snuggle closer to him when we get on the bed, and i realize that i am indeed- trying way too fucking hard... Silas doesn't seem to mind though, as a matter of fact he seems pretty damn pleased with himself... This big goofy grin has replaced the nervous smile he wore earlier, and to be honest this kind of expression kind of suited him too... He looked happy, and somehow, this lightened my mood as well... Though, the nagging thought of mom was what kept me down where i should be staying... I should be down n the dumps like a few moments ago, i should be blaming myself for mom's pain... But i'm not... And in a way that makes me feel worse...

I sigh, nothing much changed on our end... Silas playing with my hair like earlier, acting as if we didn't just become official. What should we be doing anyway? I'm pretty sure sex is a part of being a couple, i'm also pretty convinced that we're supposed to kiss... Should i make a move on him? My stomach churns, not in the good "butterfly" kind of way, but in the "oh sweet jesus i'm about to throw up my lungs" kind of way... I feel stressed... So very stressed... Not to mention scared out of my fucking mind...

"Do you think mom will be okay?" i whimper, inwardly screaming at how pathetic that sounded. Silas sighs, stroking my hair in a calming matter "Don't beat yourself up over it... None of it's your fault, your mother knows that..." he reassures, turning my head towards him, i shift to make it more comfortable. "Listen Kendal, none of this is your fault... You're completely innocent in this and i will do my best to support you when i can..." he smiles, kissing the top of my head. I close my eyes, enjoying the warmth he's emitting. "Okay..." i mumble, wrapping my arms around his waist "Thank you..."

"Hey... Lighten up, you'll be fine! I won't let anything hurt you!" he once again tries to cheer me up. I don't know wether or not to cry or laugh. How did i end up with somebody this understanding? "Thank you..." i mumble again, sniffling. Damn... Am i seriously about to cry again? Silas lifts my head "You'll be fine..." he repeats, gently placing his lips against mine, it's short and it's sweet and it's enough to make my head spin. I lay my head back down on his chest, appreciating his soft mumblings of encouragement and his hands in my hair, and before i know it- i'm already asleep.

A/N: Hooly shit it's been WAY too long! I am so, so sorry... I don't even have an excuse, i'm just really good at procrastinating! This chapter is kind of sappy, but also very sweet in my opinion! Jesus it's about time though, am i right? Hope you enjoyed this chapter!

Stay classy guys~~