I'm nobody's b!tch

Part 13: Thinking back

I turn my head in the hug, and i blink a few times in confusion as i see Leo in the doorway, tapping his feet angrily, his arms crossed over his chest and i swear to god, that glare could make paint peel... I'm too shocked to even say anything, and so is apparently Annalee... "What the hell is this!?" he continues, gesturing towards us... Annalee open her mouth to reply, but Leo cut her off "I don't remember ever allowing this... Are you cheating!?" he growls, taking a threatening step towards us.

I shake my head "Me and Silas were never in a relationship to begin with... Besides, this is... This is a hug for comfort..." i manage to croak, it feels like i haven't spoken for days even though i spoke just yesterday... Annalee nods quickly in agreement, pulling away. "Silas is that vampire boy who was so worried right?" she cocks her head to the side. Leo turns towards her and nods, but his eyes show disdain. 

"I have no intention of getting between their puppy love..." she holds up her hand, as if making an oath. This pleases Leo and he actually smiles that fantastically dazzling smile... If i hadn't been so out of it, i'd probably be all over him right now... "So you understand the situation" he nods to himself, seeming pleased. His eyes then land on me again and he pulls me into a quick hug "You poor thing... Were you lonely without me and Silas?" he pouts, i look down at my hands, not sure what to reply. "Well sure i miss you guys, but Silas i can do without..." i mumble, rubbing at my arm.

I know with myself that this in't true though... He may be the source of most of my problems... But he's been the one to solve them as well... He's taken care of me too... Maybe he's beginning to grow on me afterall? Even if that was the truth, i wouldn't tell even if he threatened me... Same goes for Leo... But with that smile i'm sure i'd tell him even without meaning to. Leo just nods as if i'm a child that needs comfort... "Sure thing sweetie, whatever you say..." he smiles sweetly at me, but i can tell that he's teasing me... 

Leo ruffles my hair "I'm just teasing you... I wanted to check up on you..." he smiles "Glad to see you're doing at least halfway fine..." he nods to himself, turning to walk towards the exit "I'll tell the others, okay? Sorry for not visiting earlier, Silas basically forbade us so that we wouldn't stress you out to much... I'll make sure to tell him you're doing fine..." Leo's kind smile becomes a grin "What a good boyfriend you have... Aren't you grateful? Anyway, take care!" he proceeds to skip out of the infirmary before anyone can say anything else...

I don't feel like arguing with air so i just lean back into my bed. Annalee smiles at me "Tell you what... I'll let you out tomorrow... So that your... Boyfriend won't have to worry anymore..." she smiles, i can detect a hint of humour in her voice... I muster the will to glare at her "He's not my boyfriend..." i snap, but Annalee just pats my back "Yet..." she winks, sweet jesus she's sounding like Leo... I decide to ignore her and i lie down again.

I most likely wouldn't have noticed that the little black spot on my chest has grown a little bigger if i hadn't been staring at it for the past few hours... I can definately see subtle changes every time i look at it... But that's most likely due to the fact that i stare at it constantly. Or, i stare at it when i'm alone... I swallow, i can't believe this is happening to me... Fuck this shit...

Well, at least i can go back to my room today, and thank god the others doesn't know...  Finally some privacy... Correction- finally i can properly cry myself to sleep just like the good old days, and that sounded really wrong... Anyway, Annalee's currently really busy with packing all of the stuff i got from Road and the others into plastic bags... Thank god i have a miniature fridge in my room... All that chocolate would last me about two years and 90 kilos...

I sigh, at least i'm finally allowed to wear comfy pants instead of that goddamn hospital gown... I just don't feel comfortable without pants... Annalee helps me out of my bed, considering it's been a while since i last walked, my feet are a little wobbly beneath me but i'll probably manage... Annalee helps me all the way to my room, it's really nice of her... Well, it's her job to take care of people but still... i hadn't expected her to go this far... 

I thank her after she's brought my stuff over as well, she gives a final word of warning about keeping in bed until tomorrow and i nod just to reassure her. Because even if i had promised to stay in bed, i wouldn't... I want to walk outside... I need some fresh air like... Right now.... That's the feeling i get.

And so i manage to wobble my way outside, using the wall for support. The moment fresh air hits my face and ruffles my hair, i feel a bit better... Being alone sometimes is good too huh... It's a little lonely though, but it's not like i'm telling anybody about that... I miss my mom... Even though she's an old hag... Nags at me about everything... I smile softly Too bad she won't get to see me grow up properly, considering... I sit down under a nearby tree, not feeling like climbing the rock wall that surrounds campus... Thoughts of mom keeps forcing their way into my head, as if trying to comfort me. Her soft brown curls, slightly chubby cheeks... Her round body and kind green eyes that always kind of, see right through me... I think i miss her more than i should...

I then remember how she used to comfort me after... "work"... And how she's scold me, scold them and swear at me, and well... Everything about her i guess... Even her crappy food... This thought weighs heavily on me. I want to see her... I want her to keep me in her warm arms and protect me like always... Even if i wasn't born from her, she's the only mom i've ever known... To be honest i wouldn't want to meet my biological mother anyway, i just need the one i have now... She's more than enough, and more than i deserve really...

I lower my head to rest it on my knees, the movement kind of hurts, since i've been lying in the same position for a week and a half... Don't really care, it's nothing compared to the dull ache... I don't even want to think about it anymore, but even so... I just can't seem to get the thought out of my mind... So i decide to keep thinking about mom... And the rest of the town... The townspeople can all burn in hell for all i care, but it is the place where i grew up... Even though the memories of my teen years are something i'd rather forget... I subconciously rub at my wrist by just thinking about it... Disgusting pigs...

I close my eyes and take in a deep breat. Speaking of disgusting pigs, i haven't seen Silas in ages... I frown, he hasn't really visited me a lot has he? But then again, why would he? I've been nothing but an ass... Well, he hasn't exactly been the nicest guy either, but he's taken good care of me lately... Besides, he still owe me for the blood drinking, and the kiss from that time- The memory of the kiss courses trhough my mind, and heat creeps up my neck and settles on my cheeks. My heart skips a beat too for some reason... I open my eyes, what the fuck?

Is it the poison? Maybe something went wrong and i die earlier than expected? But then again, she said it would be painful, and i haven't really felt anything other than the dull ache... I sigh, then why? Did he do something to- nonono, i need to stop thinking about it... Silas has already proven that he doesn't really want to hurt me.... But then again, he's a vampire! I wouldn't be surprised if he was faking it...

Actually i don't think anything could surprise me anymore... Or so i thought, but when i feel something heavy settle on my head my eyes shoot open in surprise, i come face to face with Silas, and he doesn't look happy... Never mind that, why is he so close to my face!? I instinctivly move away, and i can feel my cheeks flush in embarrassment, i nearly screamed... That would have been reaaaally awkward... "Wh-what!?" i squeak, which adds to my embarrassment. Silas just frowns "What the fuck are you doing out of the infirmary?" he questions, voice almost threatening. I swallow "I-i was released today... And, thought i could use some fresh air..." i answer flatly, at least my voice isn't betraying me anymore...

"Then why didn't you stop by to tell me!?" he growls, rubbing at his eyes tiredly. "First off, Why the fuck should i? Second of all... I don't even know which room is yours!" i hiss, crossing my arms across my chest. Silas sighs again "Point taken... Damn, you're not cute at all..." he mumbles. I huff "I'm a man, i'm not supposed to be cute, asshole..."

A/N: Sorry, sorry the update took a while cuz i really didn't have any motivation- nor the time to write anything... This chapter is unedited, and i know i hinted at something about kendall's past a few times, but you guys can probably guess what happened... If not, then you'll know eventually i guess XP Hope you enjoyed this chapter :D

Stay classy!