Obsession-Book Three (Steve Rogers)

5. GUILT

Sometimes I forget I'm still awake
I fuck up and say these things out loud
My old friends
I swear
I never meant for this
I never meant

- An Honest Mistake by the Bravery

Sophia woke up in Bucky's arms. He looked over her, making sure that she was actual with him. "Hi Angel."

"Please tell me it's a dream," she pleaded. She searched his eyes.

"I'm sorry Angel. The team is ok, but Rumlow activated a bomb. The details are still sketchy, and the team is on site trying to assist with the..." Bucky stops.

"Just say it, James. Just say it."

"They are clearing the dead and the wounded. They will be gone a few more days."

Sophia wrapped her arms around Bucky's neck and cried. She was devastated those lives were lost, the destruction caused by Rumlow and the team. She finished crying, lifted herself off of Bucky and went to the bar. She grabbed the bottle of scotch and poured herself a drink. "Want one?" She offered to Bucky.

"You know I can't get drunk off that Angel. It just tastes good to me."

"Well, you could at least drink one to keep me company. Or maybe..." She looks down behind the bar. "Yes!" she says. She holds up a small barrel. "Asgardian Mead!"

"Mead?"

"It's the only thing Steve can get drunk with." She poured a glass for Bucky. He comes over and takes the glass. She raises her glass, "to the victims," she toasts and swallow half of her drink.

"To the victims," Bucky replied, taking a large sip. "Jesus, that is strong."

"Yep," Sophia says with a pop. She finished the other half of her drink and pours herself another. "I just want to forget now." She pours another glass and takes a sip this time, the warmth of the liquor relaxing her body. Sophia keeps drinking for about an hour when she notices that its actually dark outside. "I'm going to bed." She feels fuzzy but still aware for the most part. She just wanted to sleep and forget about the day.

"Did you want me to go in now or later Angel?" Bucky asks as he downs the glass.

"I'd rather be alone tonight, James, if you don't mind." Sophia's tone is harsher than she intended.

Bucky sighs. She had been trying this all week. "You know that I can't do that Angel. I promised."

Sophia scowls. "I don't need a babysitter. I just want to sleep and be held." She frowns at the last part of her statement. "I mean..."

"I can hold you if you need me to, Angel. I'm still your best friend. And we will be honest when Steve comes home. He will understand."

Sophia studied Bucky's face. She could only see concern in his face. She doesn't understand the pull but she needed to be near him. She reached over, cups his cheek with her hand and kisses him tenderly. "Thank you, James," she says softly. "I just need a minute to get ready for bed."

Bucky is stunned. He assumes that it's the liquor making her do this. He's not all there as well because of the mead. "Ok, I'll be up in a few." Bucky reaches for her hand to stop her. "Everything is going to be ok. They will be home in a few days." He gives her hand a squeeze. She nods and heads upstairs.

"What the fuck am I going to do?" Bucky wonders out loud. He knows that Steve would want anything done for Sophia to make her comfortable. But this maybe a step to far. Bucky picks up his phone and calls Steve. After a couple of rings, it goes to voicemail