Fix Me

Wishing For the Beginning Again

STAY BY LEWIS WATSON IS GREAT FOR THIS CHAPTER

**Tinleigh's POV** 

I have ignored Ashton for two weeks. Two damn weeks. I flew back to my home town three nights after the whole overdose situation. I couldn't take it.

I have started drinking again. I was a year sober before my parents died but that didn't last. Until I met Ashton. He helped me cope. He never knew he steered me away from the alcohol. The thing is I had my secret and he had his.

But I don't even know what to think of life anymore? 

Am I not enough for anyone? Oscar didn't think so. My parents were taken from me. My sister. Now Ash, I mean he isn't gone but he could have been. 

Then what would I have done? I wouldn't have my rock any longer. The one person I want most in this fucked up world of mine could have left me. 

All I have done is stare at this empty wall in my hotel room for the past five hours. I have contemplated calling Ashton so many times.

But I ended up turning my phone off becasue I don't need to make matters worse. Epecially since I have been nonstop drunk for the past week and a half and all I would do is cry and go off on him again.

And I can't bare the thought of hurting him anymore than I already have. He needed me and I left him. I just left.

I didn't know how much he meant to me until I left.

But the thing is, I don't want a boyfriend that is going to drown his sorrows in drugs. Just as I would imagine he wouldn't want a girlfriend that gets drunk off her ass and sits in the dark with a bottle of whiskey and absolut.

I just want Ashton. The Ashton that I thought I knew. The one that would do anything and everything to make me, or anyone, smile.

But I don't know if I'll ever be able to trust him again? I don't know if it is possible for me to.

Everything is just so confused and I can't think straight because all I can do is cry.

I can't stop thinking about the fact that I almost lost him. I turn my phone back on and call Kiley.

"Kiley?"

"Yes" It's late, what's wrong?" 

"I can't find Ash anywhere."

"He is at the rehabilitation facility, remember?"

"Oh yeah... uhhh I am in Ohio."

"What are you doing there? When did you leave, actually?"

"I needed my parents but, umm, when I got here I remembered they were dead. So I've been at this hotel for like ever." I wonder if she knows I am drunk?

"Are you alone, Tinleigh?"

"Yes, always. Nobody wants to stay."

"I do. Cat does and So does Ash."

"If he did he would have come to me with his problems and not the drugs."

"I think if you give him time he will come aorund, he will get better. You know he needs you, right?"

"I do..." 

"Good, as long as you know. Where are you staying?"

"At a hotel in Cincinnati. Holiday Inn or soemething. I'm going to sleep. goodnight."

"Call me if you feel strange or need someone to talk to and lock your door. We love you, Tin."

I hang up and crawl in to the cold bed with my boos. All I can think about is how badly I wish Ashton were here.

I want him here to hold me.

**Ashton's POV**

"Coming." I walk over to the door and open it slightly. Only to see Kiley, "Where's Mikey?"

 "He's parking the car. I just thought I would come and talk to you for a bit."

"What about?"

"You know, Tin used to be an alcoholic." She said it more as a question rather than her stating a fact.

"She was?" 

"Yes, Cat was telling me about how she started after their friend Oscar passed. But then she was a year sober until her parents car accident and then she met you and it kinda stopped again and she didn't go to the alcohol after Her sister, I think it was, died."

"Did something happen?" I swear if something happened.

"She's just sitting in a hotel in Ohio, ten-thousand miles away drunk off her ass. She has called me multiple times but the last phone call I got was a little bit ago. Right before I came here." 

"She called you? Well, What did she say?"

"At first she seemed pretty confused. She said she couldn't find you anywhere and I told her you were here and then I asked where she was and she said at a Holiday Inn in Cincinnati. That was pretty much the jist of that."

"Wait, why is she in Ohio?"

"She said she needed her parents but she remembered they were dead. Ash, she is really out of it."

I never knew how broken Tin was until now, I really hurt her.  I should have never gotten us in to this mess. 

"We have to go."

"Go where? Ashton, you can't leave."

"I have to. I can't let her sit alone any longer. I am going whether you come or not."

"I'll come, I'll come. But, I don't know how Mikey will feel about this?"

"We'll tell him they released me early and that we are going on a little get-away."

We do and he goes along with everything as I knew he would.

**Tinleigh's POV** 

I wake up with an odd feeling. The room is dark and I am confused. I grab my phone to check the time. 

Seven in the morning. I must have slept all through the night. There's the first in two weeks.

I walk over to the bathroom, my head throbbing, and I begin to run a shower. 

As I let the water heat up I go over to the little coffee pot and start it up. I look around for my boos but only find empty bottles.

I say fuck it and walk back to the bathroom. I get undressed and step in to the shower. I imagine Ashton here with me. I think back to the times we'd goof off in the shower.

I know I have only been away from him for two weeks. But it feels like an eternity. 

I finish washing my hair and then I turn the water off grab a towel and make my way to the bed. I sit on the edge. After a while I realize time is going by quickly and I had zoned out.

I get dressed and lay on the floor. 

I can hear people in the halls. They sound happy. I want to be happy again. I want Ashton and I to be okay. I want this all to have been a dream.

Just as I am about to doze off I hear a knock at the door.