Fix Me

The Stars

It has been three months since my first date with Ashton and one month since my visit to my hometown.

*Flashback to the Cemetery*

"Well, here we are. I brought Jocelyn with me. She is in the car with the nurse. A very sweet nurse, in case you were wondering. She picked you some flowers back in Hornsby, by my apartment building. This is what's left of them," I chuckle because Jocey was so excited to come she kept beating the flowers on the back of the airplane seat, "people are great there, I met someone. You probably wouldn't believe me if you were here, but since you are in heaven looking down, you probably already know it is Ashton from my second favorite boy band. I thought it was too good to be true at first but I think I am really falling for him! I haven't told him of course. I feel it is much too early, we have only been dating for about two months. I've just recently took on the guitar. The only thing I know is 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star'. I'm not even good at that and all I do is go from the seventh fret to the fifth to the fourth to the second and back to the seventh fret. Sounds simple but it isn't. I am a beginner though, so I guess I shouldn't beat myself up over it. I have also taken on singing lessons, Alex and Taylor thought it would be great for me before I go on tour next summer,"

I hate that they can't be here and I can't hear their voices. I miss them so much. My dad's birthday is coming up. A week to be exact, April 13, he would be 47. It's going to be hard. "anyway, I have to go catch my flight. Jocelyn and I made you a birthday card, daddy. Here she is now to read it." I call her to come sit next to me.

"Hi, mommy and daddy. I have a card and you birthday card," she says it twice. Makes me giggle though I know she cant help it.

"Do you want to read it to him, lovely?"

"Oh, yes I would love that to read him this card."

"Well, go ahead. Let me know if you get stuck." And she reads.

"Daddy, is your birthday and we miss you. Member when you put that cake in my face that one time?" That wasn't in the card but I let her reminisce. "anyway, it says, happy birthday to the best daddy we ever had. You are an old man now and you are only getting older. This is Tins part." I take the card and read.

"Dad we miss you more than life itself. If you were here we would be out in the tent in the backyard opening your gifts and eating cake. It was a silly tradition that I began to hate but now miss more than anything. I seem to say I miss everything more than anything but it's true, I just miss you and the things we would do. Keep your eye on us big man, we love you!" I placed the card in a plastic bag type thing and put it under the vase full of Jocelyn's flowers. And with that, we left.

*April 13*

"Ashton, I'm going to go sit out back. I'm taking this blanket off your couch you can come if you'd like." I yell to him though I'm almost certain he didn't hear me. Until five minutes later when he comes out with two beers and some grapes. Interesting combination but it happened.

"What are you doing out here, love?" He looks down to me.

"Just watching the stars."

"The stars," he laughed but it was a "you're cute" kind of laugh,"mind if I join ya?"

"I kinda wanted you to!" I laugh. And he only lies down beside me. We talk nonsense for a while about the world and the people in it. He tries to impress me with his not so good knowledge of the constellations. He is adorable though so I go along.

"My dad and I used to watch the stars. Though, our reason was to look out for," I pause for a second because what I'm about to say is simply silly, "UFO's." I wait patiently for his response, which is.

"Awww, interesting but cute." Not what I expected but I'll more than happily take it.

"Today's his birthday, he'd be 47." I say after a bit of silence.

"Happy Birthday," he paused. I'm guessing he was waiting for a name.

"John!"

"John, happy birthday, John!" And I mouth the same. "Tinleigh, I think," you think what?

"What?"

"I think I have fallen for you!" I say nothing. Not because I don't want to but because I can't, "I love you, Tinleigh!" He said it and I said it back.

"I love you, too Ashton." And with that, he took me in his arms and gave me the most passionate and endearing kiss I have ever had.