Fix Me

The Hospital

As of right now I am waiting for Ashton to get his shoes on. I just recieved a call from the hospital, not too long ago, about Jocelyn. They told me it was urgent and that I should get there as soon as I possibly could.

I am currently freaking out, as you may have guessed. She hasn't been herself since we got back from Ohio. Granted she has been sick for quite some time now, This was something I had never seen my little sister experience.

"Are you ready, love?" Ashton asks as he grabs his keys off of the counter. I just nod and we make our way to his car. "Did they tell you anything other than the obvious?"

"No! They just told me to come to the hospital as soon as I could," He just places his hand in my lap as a way of calming me. "I'm hoping it isn't anything serious. Maybe she just had an episode and went around the hospital looking for me and my... parents."

"Me too, babe!" He says as we pull into the vacant parking lot.

We get out of the car and make our way to the front doors. I stop for a second to prepare myself, something I always do before entering a hospital. Mainly because what I found and the news I heard the night of my parents accident was far more than any person could possibly take. Well, far more than I could take.

"You okay, babe?" He is so caring it drives me up a wall but I love it.

"Yeah, just a bit of mental preparation s'all." With that he took my hand and we entered the cold and unwelcoming place my baby sister has called home for about a month and a half. "Hello, I'm Tinleigh Santado, I am here to see my sister Jocelyn Santado." I say to the lady at the front desk. She gives me a look I've seen only once before and I'm not very fond of it. She then gets up from her chair and takes me to my sisters room. "Jocy, how are you beautiful?" I ask as I walk in, only to find my poor baby sitting on the edge of her bed with puke running down her chin.

"Why is she puking?" Ashton asks me.

"I have no idea. Doctor Calbri, why is she puking, did she have some bad food from the cafeteria or something?" I'm not all that concerned because it is just barf, it happens quite often with little Jocy.

"Tinleigh, I need to speak with you, in private." I ask Ashton to sit in the room to keep Jocelyn company as doctor Calbri and I make our way to the hall. "Tinleigh, dear, your sister has cancer,"

"Cancer? WHAT? THAT ISN'T POSSIBLE..." I cut him off.

"Please, dear, don't yell we have patients that are asleep. Here have a seat next to me and allow me to explain." I apologize and sit next to him on the verge of crying. "We didn't find out until we had to draw blood for our monthly update on our patients. It turns out she had been diagnosed with cancer a little less than a year ago but the hospital she was in before you moved here had kept it from you. We contacted them and they told us she was on the verge of death any how so what would be the point of putting you and her through the hell of chemo and the pain that comes with this horrible disease," I am speechless. I don't understand how they would keep such a huge thing from me. Also, I don't understand what would make them think it was okay to? She is my sister, I make the final decision when it comes to her. "You can definitely file a lawsuit if you would like but in my opinion there would be no point, dear. Jocelyn has had the best time of her life these past few months, I know I haven't known her her entire life but I can see it in her eyes. She understands everything that will happen. I say you go in there hug your sister and explain to her the next step. But be gentle and calm with her."

I take his advice and go back to Jocelyn's room. I walk in, only to find Jocy sitting on Ashton's lap as he reads her a story. One of her favorite stories I will add. 'Twas the Night Before Christmas. She could read this book anywhere at any time of the day amd year.

"Hello, lovely!" I say as I finally come in from the doorway.

"TINLEIGH. Is this your boyfriend?" She points to Ashton and before I can answer he pulls her close and says,

"Of course." He then lets her go and she runs to me and gives me the warmest hug I have ever gotten from her. I sit her on the bed and she tells me some random things as we make our way to the floor on a big pallet of blankets, she asks me something that makes my heart twist and break in to a million little pieces.

"Sissy, do ew fink mom and dad know I am comin?"

"Wha-, what do you mean, baby girl?"

"When I die. Do ew fink they will know?" I can't even grasp this right now. I am genuinely pissed, who told my sister she going to die?

"Who told you that you were going to die?" Ashton just looks at me, teary eyed.

"God. Want this fish Ashin?" I decide not to ask anything else but to simply say,

"Honey, I think they will know. I think they can't wait to see you. I'm sure it is all they talk about... I'll take one of those fish!" With that Jocelyn, Ashton, and I lay there eating gold fish and talk about whatever silly thing Jocy brings up next.

It is now two in the morning and Jocelyn has finally fallen asleep. I look to Ashton who is already staring at me. I wonder how long he has been like that? "What?" I ask with a weak giggle.

"Nothing, you are just beautiful."

"Well, thank you, babe. You are pretty sexy yourself." He then makes his way over to me and lies behind me. "YOu could go home if you'd like?" I don't want him to leave, but if he was getting bored I wanted to make sure he knew it was an option.

"Nope, I want to stay right here. With you and little Jocy."

"Are you sure?"

"Surely sure!" I wait a good three minutes before responding.

"Thank you!"

"What are you thanking me for?"

"I am thanking you for being here with me. For just being by my side, I know you didn't sign up for my crazy train ride of a life but I appreciate that you have stuck around."

"My love, I wouldn't want to be anywhere else. I love your crazy adorable little sister and I love you!"

"I love you, too!" With that he pulled me in closer and gave me the most passionate kiss I have ever experienced, wrapping his arms around my waist, as tight as they would go. I eventually fell asleep right there in his arms with my face nestled in his neck and his hands drawing figure eights in my back.