I Wanna Be Yours

"Chapter 5"

Coffee is not working.

Meredith has no idea how she can survive her day if the caffeine rush doesn't hit soon.

She has three surgeries scheduled, a couple of consults waiting for her, and it feels like one of those days when the ER will fill to the brim and they'll need her help down there even if it's not in her rotation. She needs the caffeine.

Her travel mug is now empty and she's staring at the pile of paperwork on her desk with disgust. She slept fitfully the night before, thoughts of Derek Shepherd flashing through her head. When she finally closed her eyes for good, she woke up in a pool of sweat, her breathing ragged and the thoughts of kissing Derek Shepherd still planted in her head.

She should stop fantasizing about his lips and his body and his hair before bedtime.

Her pager pulls her out of her thoughts, and she groans when she sees that she has to rush back into surgery one of her post-ops.

This is going to be a long day.

The cold water on her face in the scrub room helps wake her up, though the usual near-emptiness her brain experiences right before surgery is hard to come by. She closes her eyes and takes a couple of deep breaths, calmness washing over her, slowly and steadily.

When she opens her eyes, her heart skips a beat.

Derek is coming out of the opposite OR door, a grin on his face, Bailey following suit. He looks like he has been a surgeon for longer than three days.

"Dr. Grey," Bailey nods, taking place at the sink next to hers, Derek sliding in front of the one on the farthest right.

"Dr. Bailey," she smiles back politely, ignoring Derek's eyes on her. "Good surgery?"

"Patient was touch and go, but we managed to bring him back."

"Good," she says, unable to move her gaze towards Derek. There's fluttering in her stomach, stupid blue eyes.

"What are you in for?" Bailey asks, studying Meredith with more attention, then looking at her right to Derek.

"Craniotomy," Meredith says, hoping she can keep some resemblance of normalcy as she talks with Bailey. That woman seems to know everything that is going on with anybody, no wonder she's nicknamed The Nazi. She might still be a resident, but there's not one surgeon who doesn't fear her, and Meredith is definitely in that list right now. She feels under scrutiny. "Had to go back in."

"I hope he'll make it through," Bailey nods, drying her hands, then leaving the scrub room, Derek following her like a puppy.

Meredith takes a deep, shuddering breath as she walks into the OR.

So much for avoiding Derek Shepherd.

*************************************************

Meredith Grey's hands are flawless.

He has been staring at her hands performing the craniotomy for hours, as he fills his scut paperwork in the empty OR gallery.

It's a routine emergency craniotomy, nothing fancy or worth-watching, except he's mesmerized by her every movement. Her hands are flawless, just like the rest of her.

He knows he should keep his distance, but he can't help himself, he likes being around her, even when she's crass and mean, or when she completely ignores him. She's funny, especially when she's drunk, and he wants to know her better, even though he's sure they might be breaking all kinds of unspoken rules if they even grab a coffee together.

Maybe he should get her coffee. He might be seen as the suck-up, but at least she'll get coffee.

His ringing phone startles him, and he answers quickly as soon as he reads his mother's name on the display.