I Wanna Be Yours

"Chapter 28"

"Daddy?"

Derek turns to his son, watches as David stops coloring his picture on the kitchen table to stare at him, frowning.

"What is it, Nugget?" Derek asks.

"How come I haven't seen Meri in two days?"

Derek sighs loudly. "Meredith has been really busy, buddy. Maybe she'll come around tomorrow or the next day."

He has no clue how to explain to David what just happened. He knows he can't say exactly why they've taken an unofficial break, but even saying they had a fight is reductive. They're in this limbo of avoidance and mulling over whatever they have said.

After her revelation, Derek went home and spent the rest of his night on the couch, nursing a single glass of scotch and staring into his blank TV, trying to make sense of this new Meredith, flashes of her David coming back into his head. He's giving her space, but he's not sure where they're going to go from here. They have to readjust to one another, and it's hard to keep David in the dark.

"You are very sad, Daddy. Meri makes you smile."

Derek gives him the softest, saddest smile. "She does, you're right. She's very special, right?"

"She is. I miss her lots."

"I'm sorry. I'll ask her to come over as soon as she can, okay?" Derek sighs. He knows Meredith will show up for David, she promised him as much, but he also hopes she'll keep her promise.

"'Kay!" David nods, resuming his drawing. After a few scribbles though, he lifts up his head again and asks: "Did you have a fight with Meri? 'Cause when Luke tried to hit me I stopped sharing my crayons with him, but then he sayed sorry and we were good."

"Something like that, David. It's more complicated when you're a grown-up. Small people, small problems; big people, big problems."

"Right," he says, giggling. "Nana always says that."

"And she's right." Derek sighs. "But I'll tell Meredith you miss her and I'm sure she'll come running."

David laughs again. "Meri doesn't run very fast."

At that, Derek finally cracks a true smile. "Oh, she does. When there's a patient she has to save, she runs faster than all of us."

"But she's bad at running in the backyard," David giggles, then sobers up. "She's a good friend, Daddy."

"She is. I love her."

David gives him a puzzled look, knitting his eyebrows. "You love her like a friend or like a prince?"

"Like a prince?" Derek frowns.

"Yeah, like... A prince wants to marry his princess and live happily ever after. Do you love Meri like that?"

Derek sighs, a small smile on his lips. "I do."

"Are you and Meri going to get married and live in a castle, then?" David's eyes widen.

"No," Derek smiles, trying to hide his sadness, though he's a bit amused by David's definition of marriage. Derek figures his mother told him a story at some point, involving princes and castles and that's where he got the metaphor from. Still, he can probably blame his nieces as well for such theory. "And even if we do get married, we're not living in a castle anytime soon. And never without you. You're stuck with me forever, buddy."

"Oh, good," David sighs in relief. "I'd miss you, Daddy."

"I'd miss you, too. Very, very much, David. I love you."