I can say that I am truly attracted to heights. Doing bungee jumping, zipline or any activities that has something to do with heights is what I'm really into. They say it's scary. But how? They haven't even tried it once.
But what I really love the most in falling is seeing how beautiful things are. Despite how dangerous and chaotic, the feeling is still extremely amazing. It's like flying freely though... downwards.
And then I forgot everything when I met you. I forgot how daredevil I was. The fear always come over, taking the chance of appreciating the love we had. I was scared too much on the reality that it wasn't the true love I'm looking for. That you're not the one I'm looking for. I was too young and naive but I still risked, I tried. If it's not you then at least I know why we can't.
Things happened so fast. I gave in, you took advantage. It's been real weird. It wasn't how I expect our first meet-up to turn out. It never crossed my mind that I'm gonna submit my whole self to someone I hardly known. I should've been more careful. But yeah, it happened, not only once but several times. I was stupid enough to hope that if this is the only way to seek your love, then I'll let you use me. And everything's getting a lot more worse, I am seeing the reality. That you don't really love me. And it only made me feel a lot angrier.
Despite of the ugliness, I was able to embrace all of the things that happened to me.
After falling so hard, I stood up again not minding how hurt I was, and the only thing that was on my mind is that I need to fix myself, climb up the ladder again and soar high thinking like nothing happened, like it really never happened.
But we can't just fly all the time. We still need to know how to take off, without getting so much pain, and that would take a lot more practice and lessons to learn.
Love makes us a strong human being. Brave enough to face your fears, and it is also one of the most powerful thing in the world. The real beauty of a person shows when they truly love themselves, enough to be a selfless one.
