JJ | Rafe - Oneshots

Fat | Angst

"Honey, you have to go out. It's been two weeks since you last went out. Let's go shopping!!", my mother grabbed my arms and I don' t know how but I was in some random stores in a second.

At the moment I realized the crowd that was surrounding me, goosebumps started to appear on my neck. I put my hood on and hid my face and my thighs under my super long hoodie.

"Can-can I go back to the car, Mom?!?", she ignored me and gave me some clothes before pushing me to the fitting room. "Try it and show me!! All of it no exceptions."

I looked at what my mother gave me and panicked at the sight of cute, sexy bikini and short dresses. I looked back at my mother, my eyes telling her I wasn't going to try any of that... but I apparently didn't have a word to say about it and lost the fight.

I put on one of the bikini not even looking at myself in the long mirror in front of me. I slightly looked up and stopped at my thighs.

'Look at you!! You're a whale, big and useless!! '

Shivers went to the end of my back, hearing his voice again and again. I tried to ignore it and lightly open the curtain for my mother to see. She applauded, smiling. "You're beautiful, baby!!"

I did not believe her one bite. I knew what I look like. And I hated myself so much for what I was seeing.

'For real aren't you even ashame of what you look like. I would if I was you!!'

A headache attacked me, and I finally went home, my mother happily bought me those items.

Not like, I'm going to wear them but.

"Oh, and honey, your father and I hired a new boy to mow the lawn. We told him to ask for you if he had a problem. Ok for you, cutie??", I shyly nodded. "And don't get scared, he's a nice boy, don't worry!!"

I walked back to my bedroom, changing to a new oversize hoodie and new panties. I laid down and sighed. I hated shopping, everything was so beautiful but I knew nothing would fit. It was so humiliating but my mother always dragged me with her.

I felt so ugly I couldn't even look at myself in a mirror. Why would you force me there?? To change in a unknown place, trying uncomfortable clothes for summer like I had friends to go out with during summer.

I started to sob, a feeling of disgust exploding in the bottom of my fat belly. I hid under my blanket and heard the door opened and my dog jumping next to me. My only friend.

About an hour or two later, I was woken up by a knock on the door and my dog growling. I stood up, my eyes adjusting to the daylight, trying to walk to the door lightly open.

"Who's there??", my eyes still close, I slammed the door open. The person in front of me sighing.

"Your parents told me to ask for you if I needed help. Where can I get a beer??", I froze to his voice. It repeated again and again and again in my head.

'Your parents told me to ask for you if I needed help. Where can I get a beer??'

'You're stupid and fat. What are we going to do about you for real??":

'Are you really going to wear that I school everyday??'

'You're ugly!!'

'You're fat!!'

My eyes widened as I faced him. A long silence answered his question while we were starring at each other.

He cleared his throat." Are you... going to answer?? Or...", I flinched and looked at my foot.