SERENDIPITY [KELLY SEVERIDE 1]

THIRTY-EIGHT

"Let's talk about how you're feeling." The psychiatrist asked looking at Logan who sat on her couch.

Logan looked at the woman and bit her lip, trying to figure out what she had meant.

"I feel fine." She said and the woman nodded and looked at her notepad.

"How do you feel about being suspended from your job? How has being suspended affected your personal life?" She asked and Logan shook her head and sighed.

"I got suspended. It isn't a big deal." She said and the woman nodded and she looked at Logan.

"Well, let's talk about Greg Yates, then." She said and Logan's heart stopped and the careless feeling she had before was replaced with anger as the name was said. Logan clenched her jaw and balled her fists.

"What do you remember about the night Greg Yates kidnapped you?" She asked and Logan looked out the window and spoke.

"Everything." She said and the woman nodded and licked her lips.

"And what about what he did to you? How does that affect you now?" She asked and Logan looked at her and spoke.

"What does this have to do with what's been going on?" She asked and the woman gave her a nod and shut her notebook closed.

"Everything that we have talked about so far has given me everything I've needed to know. Logan, you went through something extremely traumatic. In the span of three days, you were kidnapped, forced to watch a young girl being murdered and raped, and then you were raped." She said and Logan shook her head, looking out the window and spoke.

"What you're going through is hard, and you had a support system- Kelly Severide and your family. After speaking with Mr. Orlovsky about your missed set dates he had explained to me some things about you and the CPD, more like complaints others have had against you." She said and then opened a file and looked at it.

"'The detective working the case seemed to have an anger problem, she was eager to shoot the suspect.' Another one, 'Detective Rayner seems to be trigger happy. I can't count how many times she had lost her temper.'" She said and Logan cleared her throat and the woman spoke.

" Logan, I've made a diagnosis today about what I have found. I can explain it to you now, but is there anyone you can call to sit here with us to explain it?" She asked and Logan gave her a hesitant nod and pulled out her phone.

Kelly walked into the psychiatrist's room, in his Squad uniform, with his walkies over his torso and saw Logan sitting on the grey couch, looking out the window. The woman- Mrs. Carter, looked up and smiled at him.

"Hi, Lieutenant Severide, I'm Sophie Carter I wanted to be able to speak to you about what I have diagnosed Miss Logan Rayner here." She said and Kelly looked at the woman with a confused expression, but sat down.

"Logan has Intermittent Explosive Disorder, which basically means "flying into a rage for no reason.'" She said using air quotes and she briefly looked at Logan, who kept her gaze on the window and spoke.

" In an individual with intermittent explosive disorder, the behavioral outbursts are out of proportion to the situation, for example, all of the times when Logan would have a random outburst, it could be when you're at the table, when you're out, when you're watching a movie, these outburst don't have a set time and could be very dangerous if it isn't kept under control." She said and Kelly nodded and she spoke.

"I wanted to explain this to someone close to maybe help encourage her to get this under  control before it was too late." She said and Logan looked at the woman with a neutral expression on her face and Kelly looked at Logan and then to the woman.

"How can we get this under control?" He asked using 'we' and Logan heart began to hurt from seeing how much he truly cared about her. Mrs. Carter nodded and spoke.

"Well, there are several options that we can take, one; Logan, you can start seeing a therapist at least three times a week, Monday, Wednesdays, and Fridays. The second option is to medication, Fluoxetine, which is sometimes used as an anti depressant, but it is a great medication for I.E.D. Many people use Fluoxetine, but their are some side affects, depressive thoughts, headaches, insomnia, and nausea are the side affects most people go through. The medication is always an option and you'd be able to go back to work in 2 weeks if you're cleared." She said and Logan nodded and instantly she made her decision

"I want the medication." She said and Kelly looked at her and breathed in, he then looked back at the woman and spoke.

"Is Fluoxetine something she could get addicted to?" He asked, and the woman looked down at her notebook and spoke.

"Well, Fluoxetine is a very powerful prescription, and for now I'm only requesting that you use it for only six months. It may give off some sort of a "high" but the drug is not addictive with the dose I'm requiring for Logan." She said and Kelly nodded and looked at Logan.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" He said and Logan nodded looking at the woman and spoke.

"Positive." She said and the woman nodded and stood.

"Well, It was great meeting you, Logan, and you too lieutenant. I'm going to give this to my assistant and I will send the form to the pharmacist. I'll leave you two here to talk." She said and she left the room, closing the door. Logan looked out the window and spoke.

"Sorry for getting you in the middle of your shift." She said softly and Kelly sighed and shook his head.

"Logan-" He said and she cut him off, and she turned to him, tears already threatening to spill from her eyes.

"What I did- What I said, that wasn't okay. The way I treated you wasn't okay, Kelly." She said and a tear fell from her cheek and Kelly shook his head.

"Logan you were upset, and you were lashing out. I don't blame you for that, and I never will. We're going to get through this together." He said and he scooted over to Logan and put his arm around her and brought her close to his chest. She hugged him, her head resting where his heart was and she sniffled and Kelly kissed the top of her head and spoke.

"Now, you can come home, it's been really weird with Gabby and Matt now that she's lives with us." He said, a small smile on his lips and Logan looked up at him with a confused look and he let out a small laugh and spoke.

"I'll explain it to you later." He said and she nodded and breathed out.

"I love you, Kelly." She said and Kelly breathed out and spoke.

"I love you too." He said and Logan bit her lip, feeling somewhat guilty for the past couple of days and how she reacted.

Logan and Kelly walked into Logan's apartment, hand in hand. Logan placed her bag on the rack next to the door and a voice was heard.

"Back so soon?" Benny Severide said and Logan released Kelly's hand, Kelly's face falling and Benny smiled at his son and then looked at her.

"Logan! It's good to see you." He said and Logan gave him a tight lipped smile and nodded.

"It's good to see you too, Benny." She said and Kelly looked at his father and spoke.

"What are you doing here?" Kelly asked and Benny shrugged.

"Well, after you told me about what had happened with Patterson, I came here from Matt's place." He said and Logan smiled and nodded.

"Make yourself feel at home." Kelly said and then he looked down at Logan- as if he was trying to apologize for his father's presence.

Logan gave him a small smile and tried to make the most out of his boyfriend's father's presence to take her mind off of what she had been told earlier in the day. She walked over to where Benny was and she began to speak to him about Kelly and his work. Kelly watched the two of them speak from afar and he smiled to himself- knowing he was making the right decision by staying with Logan.