A Broken Beginning ✔️ finished

24

Emma

  Things have changed over the last week, Yes Christian is still around but he seems distant I know he is still trying but I think he will give up soon. Although I am the one to blame I can’t help the feeling of disappointment I feel, I want to be worth the fight but I know I’m not. Christian has not been here to pick me up after work on time sometimes he doesn’t show up at all, Melissa has started to hang out with a new girl and she always seems to be around in all honesty it seems like she has a thing for Christian, who wouldn’t. She is beautiful but Christian doesn’t look at her the same way which I can only hope is because he hasn’t fully given up on me. There all here laughing in the other room, and I am in my room holding a new cold sliver blade contemplating my next cut. I think I should eat before it’s been two days now and I feel weaker than normal, and once I cut I will probably black out until tomorrows shift at the diner.  I pull on a jacket and slip on some socks hopefully Melissa and her friends will be on their way out she isn’t one to stay in on a Friday night hopefully they won’t even notice me. I could never be so lucky though Melissa is walking out of her room at the same time I open my door.

“Hey girl, didn’t know you were here.”

“Umm.. Yeah.”

“Well come hang out with us for a little while.”

“I was just going to grab some food thank you though.”

I walk behind her into the kitchen where Danny Christian and the new girl are. Fuck me. I should have known this was a mistake, the way people stare at me now makes me cringe I wish I could just disappear. This is why I hide away, this is why I cut until I pass out because I am not meant to be here I am not meant to bring people down to burden them and that is all I do. I feel Christian staring at me burning a hole right through me I wish so much to be normal to tell this guy my feelings but, its better this way I would just be a problem to his life an extra weight that no one deserves. I make myself a glass of tea and grab some crackers and start towards my bedroom.

“Hey wait Emma, “

Melissa speaks as I round the corner

“Umm.. Yeah?”

“You got some mail, Christian it’s by the door go grab it for her.”

That was awkward but he stands to grab the letters and walks them to me I stayed in the hallway not wanting to face anyone again. As Christian hands me the letters his hand touches mine and I feel it. I feel the surge of electricity course through my body, oh how I miss him.

“Here you go Emma, Are you doing okay?”

“Thank you. Yeah I guess so, how are you?”

I ask as I glance at the letters in my hand, it’s the police department I freeze my heart starts to race hands start to shake. Without realizing I open the letter and read franticly my jaw drops along with the letter and I turn on my heals and run to my room.