Lovers || Five x Female Reader

1.4

"We can make you, yourself again." "And what about my family?" Five points. "What about them." Handler sasses. "I want them to survive." Five sighs. Handler turns to Luther and Klaus and Diego. "All of them?" "Yes all of them." Y/n scoffs. The handler puts on her sunglasses "I'll see what I can do. Do we have a deal?" She puts her hand out. "One thing." Five walks toward cha cha and Hazel and throws their gun and bullets. Y/n moves the bullet heading toward Luther another direction. Five stares at her. "What? He's a pain yeah but he's my brother... I guess...." She sighs. "Okay." Five and y/n shake her hand teleporting away.

"I must admit, Hargreeves' in all the time that I've been here I never met anyone quite like you guys." The handler nodded. "Hazel and Cha Cha for example are talented certainly but they can't see the big picture. You guys are spunk, your enterprising spirit, well it reminds me of a great deal of myself if I may be so vainglorious. If things work out here you can potentially make a fine successor" Y/n rolls her eyes. She didn't enjoy being back at the commission. What hell. Five notices and holds her hand. "We'll be fine." He whispers.

"I'd like to discuss the logistics of my family's safety at your earliest convenience." Y/n sighs. "As well as this body replacement." Five chirps. "Jeez. Such chutzpah. It's refreshing. I'll admit. Slow down kids. All in good time. In fact now that you finally agreed to work with us, we've got all the time in the world." The handler fixed her hair. "The commission works in support of a delicate balance between the time line of events and mankind's free will." Y/n rolls her eyes. Again. 'Ugh all this smartsy commission talk makes my brain hurt. I need a water. Or a break from that hag.' "Uhm excuse me I'll be right back." Y/n turns and walks away. "Uh-" five tries to stop her but she walks away.

"Finally." Y/n sighs. "Uh are you a little young to be here." A girl with short hair walks up to her. "No. I-I mean. Yeah. I'm so good they let me be here at age 13." Y/n crosses her arms. "Well I haven't heard of you. You're good huh? Bet you aren't as good as The Handlers favorite assassins! Their names are Five and Y/n! Oh I strive to be y/n. She's the best!" The girl smiles. "Maybe the handler will finally be proud." She sighs. "Hey uh what's your name?" Y/n sighs. "Delilah." The girl says. Y/n snaps her head at Five and the handler. "Nice talking but I gotta run."

"Five, Y/n. Meet Dot. Dot is responsible for all apocalypse matters. In fact, it was dot here who first flagged your appearance in 2019." The handler smiled. "No hard feelings." Dot laughed. "too late." Y/n muttered. 'no y/n. No violence. You're doing a good thing. Even if you have to save your family in a school uniform and a thigh gun.' Y/n sarcastically smiled. "Well you certainly put us through the ringer. Outsmarting two of our so called best temporal assassins. If that doesn't spell leadership material I just don't know." The handler puts her hand on fives shoulder. The room fell silent and all eyes were on the handler. 

"I suspect, you like a challenge. Y/n, Five. Which is why I've given you a particular complex first case." The Handler gives five a folder. "It's too bad Joseph Späh decided against sabotaging the fuel tank. It would've been so much easier." The file had a blimp on it in black and white. "Anyway if you have any questions I'll be right behind you." The handler walks away. "I'll be right back." Y/n smiles. Five nods and starts working.

"Okay" y/n sighs leaving the room. She comes back to hear Dot. "Hey a few of us are having lunch, and I was wondering if you...." "Ahem." Y/n walks up next to five. "Oh you're you're doing something." Dot looks away. Five gives a tube to y/n and they walk to the tube room hand in hand. "This one." Y/n tells five to put the tube in. "I'm afraid that's not procedure." The Handler grabs it. "Hargreeves, meet Gloria. Gloria is perhaps the single most vital cog in our machine. Gloria this is number five and his girlfriend, ahem, y/n." Y/n scoffs and rolls her eyes at the handler.

"Wife, actually." Five nods. "Look at the two of you. Deadly little things. So happy we decided to close the contract on your lives." Gloria smiles. "I'm afraid your reputation precedes you. And it looks like your building on it here. Oh  Karl Weber? Now tell me why unfortunate Karl?" The handler opens the tube. "Karl Weber is the butcher at the shop where Captain Ernst A. Lehmann acquires his weekly roast." Five starts. "So if Karl dies, his butcher shop is passed on to his son Otto who doesn't wash his hands. Which is disgusting. " Y/n sighs.

"So he's the one who gives the captain the roast." The handler says shocked. "And that gives him food poisoning." Five smiles at his wife. "Which makes him late for work." Y/n smiles. "Which delays the takeoff." Five continues. "And to make up for lost time the Hindenburg flies through a weather front of high electrical charge of humidity." Five turns to the handler. "And the static electricity inside the aircraft makes it a virtual tinderbox. Tiny engine sparks and just like that..." y/n turns to five. "Boom." Five mimicked an explosion.  "Very well you two. Cmon." The handler walks.

"I'm sure you've all heard that Five and Eight have proven to be as adept with a pen as they were with their sword or-or gun." The handler looks at y/n's gun. "Let their efforts serve as inspiration to you all. Herb! How long have you been on the Lusitania?" The handler tells a man. "Oh uh. Let's see. I uh." "Sorry? Sorry I can't hear you. Still can't hear you." The handler says as the man mumbles but a buzzer is sounded and everyone gets up and goes to lunch.

Y/n hums as five grabs a folder from Dots desk. "Do you ever notice how we never eat? We can go a whole week with no food." Y/n stops humming. Five smiles at her. "This. This is why I married you." And pecks her lips. "Cmon."

Five and y/n in a restroom stall looking at the folder. The door opens. "Shit." Five whispers. Y/n stands on the toilet. "Five if I fall in I swear I-" "so how's your first day going?" The handler goes to the stall next to them. "Couldn't be better." Five shushes y/n. "Glad to hear it." The handler says. Y/n gags. She's standing on a toilet listening to the Handler doing her business. Worse than the apocalypse. The handler starts coughing like a cat had a hairball.

"I burned my rugae. Ever burn your rugae? The ridges on the hard palate that helps pass food to the esophagus. Anyway I'm on a liquid diet for 2 days hence the marathon of urination. One faulty cog and nothing works as it should. You know we value integrity at the office above all else. Trust is essential and that trust is built over time." The Handler kept talking but y/ns shoe almost fell in the toilet so she gaged again. "Gross." She groaned. Then The toilet flushed and The Handlers Stall opened. "I'm feeling peckish. Have you had your lunch?" "Not yet." Five said stiffly. "Great. How would you like to have lunch with me in my office? You know once your done doing whatever you are." The handler slips something under the stall causing y/n to burst out laughing. "Stay safe kids." It was a c0nd0m.