(Completed Jenlisa)
Lisa and Jennie, have been in love with each other for so long as the courage comes out of the Thai, to propose to her girlfriend in front of everyone. Frustration creeps on Jennie as she finds herself falling out of love with he...
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Jennie
Another week passes.
My head ran wild with images of our nights, our talks, and our love that hasn't ceased.
Premises, I assumed it would be easier this way but it wasn't. Almost like, the more time I spend away from her, the more I yearn for what has been lost.
Chaeyoung and I decided to take Ella to her grandma's, seeing as she has missed her and missed seeing Lisa, who hasn't rung my phone in ages.
Her silence was killing me.
Yet, you killed her springs.
After settling down inside the Manobans' house, Ella went to play with her Grandmother, Chaeyoung questions me, "Be honest, Jennie. Is this just an excuse to see Lisa?".
My head snapped in her direction in shock. I bit my bottom lip and didn't answer her. Cause, what can I say? Neither was I able to deny or agree.
Chaeyoung frowns from beside me, "Jennie, how long will this last for?".
She presses, "If you don't love Lisa, and is determined to be on separate ways, why not ask for a divorce already?". My heart sank at the thought, and my eyes widened, in a way, I internally panic.
"What?". I choke out, "What about Ella?".
"It's better to end it, rather than her standing there, watching her parents live so unhappily with one another. One choosing her pride and the other, not being able to look you in the eye". Her honesty didn't surprise me, but hearing those words made me panic, "Look deep within, that's when you will find the answers to your questions, cause saying you don't love her is just pure ignorance, at this point. To yourself and to your daughter too, Jennie".
Before I was able to make a response, the door opens with Lisa's voice echoing as a feminine voice laughed, "I told you their food was good, you didn't believe me".
Chaeyoung looked my way, but I just shrug my head.
Even with this aching and painful feeling inside my chest. I didn't have the right to be mad or be jealous. What really killed me slowly, is how the woman made Lisa smile. The smile that once used to be for me. The smile she could've still smiled at me.
Brown doe eyes meet mine, rather in shock that I was here. But, why does she need to bother with someone who she no longer wants to look in the eye?
I got up, and Chaeyoung did the same.
I didn't even bother greeting the woman beside her. In ignorance, I didn't want to face the one who could be my replacement. I couldn't stand here and be weak.
Just in time, her grandmother came into the scene, I softly confirmed to her, "I will come to pick up Ella later, yeah?".
Lisa's grandmother kisses my cheeks and nods at me, almost sadly.
Was I that miserable?
-
Later that day, I sat in the car, my heart beating with her name, as it slows at the thought of her having somebody new. I couldn't help it. I couldn't help how much I was thinking of the possibility of Lisa finding someone else, despite how selfish it sounded.
Slowly, I mark my steps to their house to get Ella.
The little one didn't stop chattering and smiling. We bid goodbye to the grandmother, with no sight of Lisa. I gulped hard and secured my daughter inside the car before jumping into the driver's seat.
"How was your day baby? Did you have fun at grandma's?".
"Yes mommy!". She was eating a candy bar, that her grandmother gave her while we were on the way out, "Mommy Lisa's friend is so nice".
My heart dropped, "Is that so?".
"Yes!".
"Good baby". I sadly smiled, "As long as you had fun".
-
Tucking her in bed has been my daily favorite part. That's when peaceful Ella comes in—she would adorably cuddle me until her eyes fall shut, but this time she seemed a bit more hyper than usual.
"Someone ate a lot of sugar". I playfully pointed at her nose as she scrunched it and pouted, "I love candy".
"And candy loves you". I caressed her cheek lovingly.
"Do you believe in candy monsters, mommy?".
I pressed my lips together and raised my hands in the air, in a motion like I was ready to attack her, she pulled the blanket close to her chest. Fear evident in her eyes, "Maybe!". I started tickling her as she giggled so loudly.
It made my heart soften, a lot.
"Mommy! I-I can't breathe!".
"The candy monster will get you!".
"No! Mommy!".
Once her laughter cooled down, I inched my head down and kissed her forehead, her body relaxed at my touch. I whispered, "Even if there is a candy monster, I will protect you, baby Ella".
She held her little arms in the air, "Hugs and kisses?".
My heart melted.
I gave her lots of kisses and hugs. Being affectionate with her is the least I can do. I love Ella with everything that I have and with all my heart. Could this marriage be my favorite crime? I doubt so.
"I miss seeing you happy, mommy".
Her words surprised me, I was struck.
I forced a smile, "I'm happy because I have you, munchkin".
"No, mommy, I miss seeing you happy with mommy Lisa here, in our house".
