At Sundown | Jack Harlow

What's It Been? Twenty Years?

   My jaw drops. No matter how many times he could message me, I'd still be shocked. He saw my post, the whole post.

   I check my post, swiping through the first two pictures, and stopping on the third, where his jacket makes its appearance. I stare for a while, then swipe to the last picture, me leaning against the record shelves slightly, his jacket loosely around me with my hands in the pockets. I can feel my smile through the picture and Anna's voice echoes through my head.

   "Would've been cuter if Jack's arms were around you instead of his jacket." She smirked at me and it made my mouth curl into that big, happy, dreamful smile.

   I don't open his DM. I forget about it the second my doorbell rings and it's my mom. Her warm gaze holds me and everything else disappears. I haven't seen her since she moved to New York five years ago.

   "Mom," My voice is shaky and she pulls me in for a hug. Her arms wrap around my neck and I lift mine around her waist. I hold back my tears and we stand in the doorway for what seems like hours.

   I hear Anna's room door open and her footsteps grow louder. They halt behind me and my eyes open. I reluctantly pull back from the hug, grab her suitcase, and turn to Anna. She's never met my mom, but they've spoken over the phone whenever I'd call her. I take the suitcase to my room.

   When I enter the living room, Anna and my mom are moving out of a hug, and my heart rate feels out of control. My best friend, no, my sister, and my mom are meeting for the first time.

   We sit on the couch and tell stories. Anna brags to my mom about how good of a photographer I am.

   "I told her to finish her college courses, but she wanted to work at that record store." She nudges me on the arm and rolls her eyes.

   "If that's what my little flower wanted, I support her. I do wish she had spoken to me before dropping out though." My mom's voice is soft.

   "I should've, I know, but I knew you were busy performing and didn't want you worrying." I smile softly at her, wishing she didn't have to do shows so often.

   "How is it?" Anna breaks the silence and my mom cocks her head slightly. "Broadway I mean." My mom's mouth makes an "o" before placing a hand over Anna's.

   "It's," She looks at me, her eyes warm. "Fun. The love we get from the audience is unbelievable, but I miss my flower." She pulls at a strand of my hair and I shiver.

   She looks down. She wants to ask me something.

   "What is it, mom?" I lean forward, watching her face. She looks up at Anna. She nods and goes to her room.

   "Sweetie. Has your, uh, dad contacted you?" Her eyes lock onto her hands in her lap. I lean back onto the couch. Why would he contact me if he didn't care about me enough to stay around?

   She looks up at me and I shake my head, staring at the ceiling. I hear her sigh and close my eyes. Why did we have to talk about this?

   "Why would he?" I sit straight up, waiting for her to answer, but she doesn't. Instead, she pulls out a white envelope from her handbag and I wait for her to say something, but she's still silent. Her eyes are fixed on the floor as she hands me the envelope.

   My heart stops as I flip it over; From Jay P. I haven't seen or heard his name since I was ten.

   I pull a letter out and drop the envelope on the floor.

   Dear Janet.

What's it been? Twenty years? I saw you got a gig in New York, I'm happy for you.

How's Vi? I've been keeping up with her Instagram. I know that seems weird but I don't know, I started wishing I was around, for both of you.

Anyway, I was wondering, do you think she'd respond to me if I messaged her? I saw that she's into Jack Harlow. I have a connection to get her into shows for free. I figured it's the least I could do for her.

Just... get back to me if you can. Here's my number.

   I turn the letter face down onto my lap. "When did you get this?" All I hear is my mom's breathing and the sound of my heart racing in my ears.

   She turns to me slightly. "Last week. He sent it to the theatre." Her fingers fiddle with each other. She feels...I don't know.

   "Why now?" My voice is sharper than I intended. Mom shrugs.

   "Hey, why don't we cook something? Like we used to?" She beams up at me, her smile infectious as always. I nod and get off the couch, crushing the letter into a ball and tossing it into the trashcan.

9:52 p.m.

   The food was great, and Anna seemed to agree with that. She gobbled up her food in five minutes. Mom is sleeping in my bed, and I said I'd take the couch.

   I peer my head up, looking at the trashcan I threw the letter in. I don't know why, but I get up and take the letter out, straight it. and add his number to my phone.

   My finger hovers over the call button. I hesitate at first, but I press it. Shit, no, I can't do this. I move the phone from my ear, but right before I end it, there's a voice on the other end.

   "Hello?" He says and I move it back to my ear.

   "Jay?"