Of Tales and Tails - A Quacknoblade Story

Ocean Eyes

The hour when Tommy, Wilbur, and Phil were out of the house so he could have quiet time, which happens every week, it was Techno's experiment time.

He came up with the following conclusions:

He can turn into a fish

He has pink scales

He has pointed ears when he turns into a fish

He can last being a human for 30 seconds before he turns into a fish

If he dries his hands really quickly before the 30 seconds, he will not turn into a fish

Anyways, Techoblade had a problem. A big problem.

It just so happened that his "water resistance from turning into a mermaid" was decreasing everyday. In case you didn't remember, the original amount of time he could withstand without turning into a pink and gold mermaid was 30 seconds. And it was as if God didn't see it as enough time because it had turned from 30 seconds to 15 seconds.

It was a good thing that nobody was home when he found out. Technoblade was just being a good kid, washin' the dishes, making sure to wipe his hands dry every 30 seconds. It was fine, the first two minutes he was washing the dishes. Technoblade dried his hands once his timer hit 28 seconds (just in case) and went back to washing the dishes.

And then, unexpectedly, he started glowing. Then crashed onto the floor.

Technoblade cursed in his head. Then started going off all of the possibilities that could have resulted in this phenomenon.

Had he forgotten to dry his hands? But the timer hadn't beeped! It was working fine about 15 seconds ago...

Unless somewhere up in the stars had decided that his life wasn't hard enough already, they had shortened the "Technoblade-turns-into-fish" timer from 30 seconds to 15 seconds. And for some reason, that seemed like the most likely case.

So, Technoblade did the most reasonable thing one could do at the moment and angled his head towards the ceiling. Then, he shouted at no one in particular.

"I know I'm an atheist but could you PLEASE give me a break?!"

Then he continued sitting on the floor, unmoving, because who in the world could move with a giant tail? Unless they are in water, of course.

As Technoblade waited for his tail to dry and to turn back to normal, he decided it was a good idea to check himself out. (That sounds so wrong LMAO) He successfully managed to butt-scootch himself forward and used the oven as a mirror, which conveniently did some reflecting.

His eyes widened. And for the first time in his life, Technoblade would say that he was scared. Fearful. Absolutely terrified. If it weren't for his amazing self control (Techno got some big ego right there) he might have screamed.

Techno's ears had become pointed, sticking to the side as if he were a sad dog. His lips looked plumper than usual and his hair had become wavy. Definitely not his regular style of hair but, Techno would admit, it looked somewhat good.

What shocked Technoblade the most was that his normally ruby red eyes were now a crystal blue color. Technoblade cursed once again in his head. Now, even if someone caught him in his mermaid state, and didn't even see the tail, they would know something was up. Like the very visible change in his eye color.

He turned his face to the side, examining his cheekbones and jawline, surprised that nothing much changed. Except for the fact he now had scales right where his cheekbones became visible, just like...

Sally.

She was the one who gave him this cursed necklace in the first place! And the necklace had cursed him as well, making him turn into a mermaid, no matter if he was wearing it or not. Technoblade found that out a while ago as well.

Like any good person plotting revenge on someone who changed his life forever, Technoblade started listing off the ways he could completely demolish this salmon-red monstrosity of a human being that Wil-I-Am Carbon Remains actually liked.

Maybe he could thank her for the necklace one day, murder her, cry at her funeral for "how much he appreciated her for the gift she gave him just before she passed", make everybody feel bad for him, and ultimately get away with the murder. (Gee, he is such a Gemini. I say this as a Gemini.)

Okay maybe he won't get away with it, because Technoblade never cries. Unless Floof dies, of course.

While Technoblade was thinking of all of the ways he could deep fry a salmon, his tail had dried and freed his legs. His eyes had turned into his usual ruby red color and his hair had magically braided itself. Technoblade sighed and set his timer to 15 seconds, then continued to wash the dishes. He would have to fry a fish later.

...

Technoblade likes to say that it was just his luck that Wilbur invited him to a pool party. And by "invited him" he meant "drag him against his will, literally strap him into the car and kidnap him to a social event."

He was at least allowed to bring his phone, a book, and peace away from water, granted by Phil who saw that Technoblade seemed less than happy about having to go to a party with living breathing people and masses of water.

But that did not relieve Techno in the slightest. What if the water splashed onto him? What if Sally was there? Oh, who was he kidding, of course Sally was there if Wilbur was there. And worst of all, what if there were people who wanted to socialize with him?

All of these thoughts were carried with him through the gates, in the car, and onto the bench where he decided to spend his time for the next hour or so.

When he opened his book, all Techno begged from the universe was for NO ONE to approach him, and for NO WATER to splash onto him.

"Heya Technoblade! How are ya?"

It was Quackity. Of course, of all people to approach him when he least needed it, it was Quackity.

"Hullo," Techno said, trying to avoid eye contact. One thing Techno had learned from previous conversations was that making eye contact states, 'Hey! I want to talk to you :) I am definitely in the mood of doing so and I'm definitely not making subtle moves saying that I don't want to socialize!'

Of course, Quackity never gave up on annoying other people. So he kept talking, while Technoblade gave the smallest remarks, usually just saying 'yes' or 'no'. Until one question in particular caught Techno's interest. And not necessarily in a good way.

"Hey Techno, would you like to go on a swim with me?"

What the heck?

Like, who would just randomly ask someone that? Did Techno zoom out halfway through the conversation?

Wait-

Did Quackity know?

"No," he replied, a little too quickly, before adding, "Thank you."

Quackity seemed to narrow his eyes, suspicious of him. Then started staring off into the distance. Fifteen seconds passed, then thirty.

"Quackity, you've gone all quiet. It's kinda unnervin''." Technoblade looked at him, concerned, waving a hand up and down in front of Quackity's face.

"Uh yes I was just thinking about something," Quackity said quickly, cheeks turning red from embarrassment, "Sorry."

Quackity then scurried off away from Technoblade, leaving Technoblade alone.

This was a strange pool party.

---

Author's Notes

Three chapter updates in one day? POG!

Yeah no, I wrote them all in the past and then thought it was too weird to post it bc the story line went a little too quickly lmao. But I decided "AAAEEEEA" and just posted it

Also 1k word chapter yooo?