Freedom Of Thought.

Selfless

Tears running down your face,
The pouring rain acts as a camouflage,
But the sadness still can be seen through
it,
Walking in the rain like there’s none,
The sad face tells it all,
Cars move out if your way for the
assumption you’re mad,
It’s pain that fills your heart and radiates
from within,
At this point even death won’t be enough
to take it away,
It is just but another thing,
Thoughts of cutting creep back in,
You fought long and hard with them last
time,
And that was just three days ago,
There’s no assurity you’ll win this battle
again,
The succession is quicker than a split
second,
Depression quickly sets in,
The heart gets more damaged than ever
before,
It’s shattered to more pieces than you
can pick up,
Some so tiny you can’t see,
You lose control of yourself so fast,
You don’t notice it till it’s done and life
has taken its toll,
Thoughts of the bad walk your way,
But the one of living quickly strides away,
And in that moment you let yourself go,
Come what may, you don’t care,
You’re so restless and don’t have the will,
let alone the strength,
Soaked and in pain you drop to the
ground,
The emotional pain is so overwhelming it
turns physical,
Tears run out,
Eyes puffed and with pain,
Bitterness fills the being but there’s
noone to share with,
Everyone wants to play doctor,
You do not need that, you need a friend,
So petty is their understanding,
You want someone to talk to, yes,
But you also want someone to tell you
their problems,
Just so you could console yourself you’re
not the only one,
Two always make it better, more seldom
make it best,
Thoughts racing through your mind,
Lost in time you become,
Bright lights flash before you,
Bringing you back from your sub-conscious,
Horns honking, people rushing toward you,
In a race with life and you’re in last
place,
Fighting to get the next breath, you lift
your head off the ground,
You’re in the middle of the road and it’s
the rush hour,
Even the onlookers don’t give you a
shoulder,
You drag yourself off to the side of the
road,
They murmur as they walk away,
You’re so weak and yet you’re watching
your only help walk away,
Phone in your pocket but it’s of little use,
There’s noone you can call,
Reality sets in, you have no friends,
You hold on to it hoping to get some heat
from it,
It’s no help still,
The cold is too much, you’re quivering,
Not even the mouth can stay shut,
Every part of you goes against you,
The only thing left for you, in and out, is
your gray matter,
But what use is that when you’re out in
the cold,
When you’re in pain,
When there’s noone there with you,
When all it does is remember sadness and
fill you with pain?
You finally make the choice,
The hardest one ever,
You take one big, last swallow,
Put the gun to your head,
And pull the trigger,
It’s all over now in both aspects,
Your brains all over the road,
And your pain all over!