I don’t know where to start or where to
proceed, my thoughts are in a rapid motion
and I can not keep up anymore. So weak
I have become, sad and guilty too. Each
day seems so long and yet life is so short.
If I could I’d give you mine; you were of
more importance to this world than I ever
will be. Not even a picture with you do I
have left, always saying we’ll take it one
day. Well, now we’ll never get to take it,
and that one day will just remain to be one
day. I keep having flashbacks of our time
together, some good times those were. How
I wish I had just one more of those, one is
all I ask for; so I can take you for a
swim, a jog, a gym session, a night out at
your favourite spot. So I can give you that
one girl’s number, introduce you to her, help
you get her, help you overcome your
shyness, put the words where you put the
smile. Truth now is, I can’t get even a
second more, and we’ll never get to do all
that, not in this world. This confusion has
really got me. My eyes filled with tears, no
reason to get excited anymore. Life is such
a joker! Man, I miss you too much
already, there’s an emptyness that can’t be
filled in me. I should’ve been there for you
and with you like you were for me, but it’s
over now. I never was that good friend to
the end, I let money come between us. The
most worthless of things drove me further
apart and I wasn’t there when you needed
me. Now I need you more, but I can’t
have you. I don’t have a voice anymore,
I’m sorry. If only I made the time for
you, to come be with you, maybe I would
feel better than I am now. Maybe I I would’ve
gotten to say goodbye, and a proper one for
that matter. I hope your last thought of me
was of the good person I was. You’ll never
forgive me, never hit me with your gigantor
hands. You’ll not hear her voice again. I
talked to her today, relayed the news, and
she was deeply saddened. Turns out, she
liked you too, she just was waiting for you
to make your move. Oh how I laughed at
you when you couldn’t walk up to her, you
never took offense, those were good times.
Now everytime I walk past my gym I
think of you, I hear you telling me you
want to come with me. I wish you were
able to. You will always be there in my
heart, I love you so. When I was feeling
weak you made me strong, you were
always the one for me at the time, I love
you so. I’ll miss carrying your stuff around
for you, hitting you when I felt like it,
sitting next to you, listening to you talk and
say the weirdest of things. You were one
interesting chap. The fight in me has gone
with you, now I might be beyond repair,
my next step is unclear. You’re needed
here, at least for closure. The tears I cry
won’t bring you back, but every time I
close my eyes I see that face and shed a
tear. I’ll be there on that day to say my
goodbye. I’ll make it count for my sake,
you don’t know what’s going on anyway.
See you then brother. I’ll take care of
myself for you till then and past. There
must be some kind of way out.
YOU ARE READING
Freedom Of Thought.
PoezjaIf my thoughts were a pen and my hands were the canvas, even I would not fully get the sense of it.