In The Darkest Hour

Part Two - Chapter Four: Catching Up

Isla took a deep breath as she stepped into the quiet café, it wasn’t hard to spot the man that she had come to talk to and she was a little nervous; she had no idea what to expect from her talk with Gerard.

It had been a large surprise when they had bumped into one another the night before and Gerard had insisted that they meet up; Isla could only imagine what he wanted to talk about.

“Hola,” Isla greeted walking over to Gerard, he was sat at the table waiting for her and looked so nervous; she didn’t blame him especially with their history.

Gerard got to his feet and moved to hug Isla, he had missed her and he knew that so much had changed since he had last seen her; he wanted to know everything that had happened since they had last seen each other.

Isla had introduced him last night to her boyfriend and while Gerard had been devastated at the news; he wanted her to be happy, that was all that he wanted after everything that had happened to her in Barcelona.

“Hola,” Gerard murmured looking down at Isla, she looked better than the last time that he had seen her; she had put weight back on and no longer looked sickly pale.

Isla moved to sit down, her eyes watching Gerard curiously not knowing what to expect from him; she knew that he had once loved her but she was still hoping he had moved on like she had.

“How have you been?” Isla asked curiously, she was so worried about him and hated to think how badly Gerard had taken her leaving; he had been a mess at the airport and she wanted to know that he hadn’t turned back to drinking.

“I’ve been good,” Gerard replied simply, he knew why she was asking and he didn’t blame her but he had stayed sober while she had been gone and he had no intentions of slipping back into bad habits.

“What about you?” Gerard asked softly, he wanted to know that it had all been worth letting her go when he had; he had wanted her to get better and for her to recover from what had happened to her.

Isla deserved so much better and Gerard could only imagine how bad things had truly been; he didn’t know much but he knew that Isla had been a mess when she had left.

“Better, a lot better,” Isla confirmed with a smile, she was in a lot better place in her life now and the move had done so much good for her; she might have demons still but they would all go away in time.

Gerard nodded pleased with that news, his heart tightened at the idea that he hadn’t been the one to help her instead it had been Dev; he had no idea how to feel about her new boyfriend.

“You and Dev?” Gerard murmured looking down at his drink, he hated to ask about the new man in her life but he wanted to make sure that she was happy.

Isla stared at him for a moment, she could see that the idea was hurting Gerard and she wished that it wouldn’t; she could only imagine what he was thinking right now.

“Over a year now,” Isla replied feeling bad that she had moved on, she had asked him not to wait for her for this reason; she wanted him to be happy and that couldn’t happen with her.

Isla had accepted that fact a long time ago, she and Gerard were never meant to be; there was no way a happy ending could be found for them since she couldn’t bear to be in Barcelona and Gerard’s entire life was there.

“Good… I’m happy for you,” Gerard whispered not wanting to let Isla know how much that idea hurt him, she’d been gone eighteen months and he knew that he should have seen this coming.

Isla deserved to be happy and he would have to let her go soon so that she could return to her life.

“What about you?” Isla asked hopefully, she didn’t want Gerard to waste his time on her when he could do so much better; she wanted to see him happy and settling down even if the idea did hurt her.

Gerard stared at Isla, he knew why she was asking but he hadn’t been able to bare the idea of going on a date when his heart belonged to her and it always would; no one could ever replace Isla in his mind.

“I’m focusing on Milan… he needs his padre,” Gerard replied with a shrug of his shoulders, he watched Isla knowing that she would understand why he wasn’t dating; he didn’t want her to feel bad about his decision to never date again.

There was only one woman that Gerard wanted to spend the rest of his life with and she was sat across from him right now; he doubted that he would ever love anyone like he loved Isla.

“Gerard,” Isla whimpered not liking this at all, she felt her heart breaking at the thought that he would wait forever for her; she hated this when she had asked him not to wait for her.

Gerard gently reached across the table and took Isla’s hands, he held them knowing that he didn’t want to upset her; that wasn’t why he had wanted to meet with her.

“Are you happy Isla?” Gerard asked staring right into her blue eyes, he was sure that she was and he had a feeling that Dev had been good for her while she had rebuilt her life.

Gerard would forever blame himself for what had happened to Isla, his therapist had tried to tell him otherwise but he didn’t believe her; he had ruined Isla’s life without knowing the truth and this was his punishment for his actions.

“Yes,” Isla whispered feeling tears fill her eyes, she was happy with Dev and he was good to her but sometimes she could only see him as her best friend; they hadn’t even been intimate yet and she wasn’t sure if she would take that step with him.

“Then that’s all that matters to me,” Gerard replied simply with a smile, he would stand back and let Isla be happy because that was what she deserved and he would always make sure that she was happy.

The two were silent for a moment as Gerard words hung in the air, it was unbelievable that all this had happened between them that there was so much left unsaid; they both were willing to sacrifice so much for each other.

“You can’t do that Gerard,” Isla said shaking her head, she wanted this to be better and she hated to see him hurting when he deserved so much more.

Isla knew that Gerard had been sort of happy with Kathleen and she wondered why he had never gone back to the blonde; she had a feeling that she knew the answer to that but didn’t want to make things worse.

“I can Isla… there is only one woman that I want and I can’t have her,” Gerard replied staring at Isla, she was all that he had ever wanted since Isabel had passed and he wasn’t going to let his heartbreak again.

Isla sniffled looking at Gerard, she hated all of this and she wished that there was some way to make everything right; they were such a mess and she didn’t want to leave for Australia again without trying to fix things.

Gerard slowly pulled away from Isla, he knew that if he continued to look at her like that then he would do something stupid and kiss her; he wasn’t going to ruin things for her again not after last time.

“How’s Australia?” Gerard asked trying to change the subject, he was curious about her life there and he hoped it was a better one than the one that she had left behind.

Isla stared at Gerard for a moment before she nodded her head and slowly started to tell him about her life in Sydney, her heart aching at the fact that soon she would be leaving him again.

Isla knew that she could only lie to herself and everyone else for so long, she stilled had feelings for Gerard and it was only a matter of time before she did something that would hurt everyone that was involved.