In The Darkest Hour

Part One - Chapter Eight: Getting Better

“Shall we go to the park?” Isla asked cooing over Milan, it was a nice day and she was sure the little boy would enjoy a little trip out; she didn’t fancy being stuck inside the house on a day like that.

Milan babbled happily at the idea making Isla smile, she picked him up and balanced him on her hip; she doubted that they would be seeing Gerard until later anyway.

It had been a couple of days since he had gone back to training with the club and Gerard was doing his best to get back in shape for the friendly matches that were coming up.

“Do you want to feed the duckies?” Isla cooed making sure that she had everything for Milan, she kissed the top of the little boy’s head; she was still hoping that Gerard would soon bond with his son.

It was only a matter of months now until Milan would start talking and Isla wanted to make sure that Gerard was the one that the little boy shared that moment with.

Milan babbled and cooed as they headed downstairs, it was the one of the few times that Isla had taken the little boy out by herself; she was a little nervous when it came to paparazzi.

Isla didn’t like the fact that grown men could follow them around, she hated being followed especially when she was out with Milan; it scared the little boy and there was little that she could do about it.

Making sure that she had everything, Isla stepped out of the house and walked over to the car; she peeked at the gates that surrounded the house sure that there would be a couple of paparazzi waiting to snap pictures.

Putting Milan in his car seat, Isla wondered how people could be so intrusive and get away with it; she was fed up at having questions shouted at her when she was just the nanny.

***

“You look good,” Lionel mused sipping on his water as he watched Gerard, he had no idea what to say to his best friend but he was glad that everything was getting better; he wanted his friend to recover after what had happened.

Gerard looked up at Lionel and nodded his head, it might have been five months since he had lost Isabel but that didn’t mean that it didn’t still hurt; he was only just now getting back on his feet.

“How are things at home?” Lionel asked setting his bottle down, he had no idea how Montserrat had done it but he knew that hiring Milan’s nanny had been a good idea.

Lionel hadn’t only seen her a couple of times but Isla was doing a wonderful job and he hoped that she would be sticking around for a while; he had no idea what Gerard would have ever done if she hadn’t come into his life.

“Things are good… Isla keeps Milan busy,” Gerard replied awkwardly, he still hadn’t spent much time with the little boy and he doubted that he ever would.

Milan was a constant reminder of what Gerard had lost and he wasn’t ready to face that, the little boy was always going to make him think of Isabel and he didn’t want that when he was trying to live on.

Lionel frowned, he could see how much his friend was struggling and he feared just how much Gerard would push Milan away to a point where he would lose the little boy for good.

“Do you spend time with him?” Lionel asked carefully, he was worried about what Gerard was doing at home and having Isla living in the house meant there was a chance that he would never bond with his son unless he had to.

Gerard shook his head, he messed with his own water bottle and looked away knowing that he didn’t need Lionel’s telling him that he should.

Lionel sighed and shook his head, he had no idea what Gerard was going through and he hoped that he never had to go through that; he doubted he would cope much better if he ever lost Antonella.

“Gerard… you can’t avoid him forever,” Lionel whispered not wanting to snap at his friend, he wasn’t going to push Gerard into doing anything that he didn’t want to do.

Lionel wanted Gerard to move on with his life and see what a wonderful gift that Isabel had left him with; she wouldn’t want him to spending the rest of his life miserable.

“I know… it’s just hard to be around him,” Gerard murmured not looking at Lionel instead focusing on the others that were at the training session; he knew they were all worried about him but he was going to get better and return to doing what he loved.

“Isabel didn’t want to have a baby Leo… she’d still be here if I hadn’t gotten her pregnant,” Gerard whispered feeling guilty bubble in his stomach, he loved the idea of having children with Isabel but now she was gone because of what he had wanted.

Lionel stared at his friend, he didn’t want any of this eating away at his friend making him feel responsible for a mistake a doctor had made; the doctor had been the one to mess up and cause Isabel’s death.

“It’s not your fault Geri… it’s the doctor’s fault for messing up her care,” Lionel argued softly, he wasn’t about to tell Gerard anything about Isla or what Montserrat had planned; he could only imagine what his friend would do if he knew what was going on.

Gerard nodded his head, he would always blame himself for Isabel’s death but there was someone he blamed more for what had happened and he wasn’t going to let all of this go.

“No it’s the nurse’s…” Gerard spat making Lionel look at him worried, he hoped to whoever was listening that Gerard never discovered that Isla was that nurse.

***

“You’re home early,” Isla said surprised to see Gerard as she stepped into the living room with Milan, it had been a wonderful trip to the park and she was pleased with the fact they hadn’t really been bothered.

Gerard nodded his head not looking up from the newspaper that he was reading, he had been saving them for months until he was ready to start reading the articles about what had happened to Isabel.

“Anything interesting in the paper?” Isla asked moving to set Milan into his play pen, she cooed softly to the little boy before she turned to face his father; she felt a knot form in her stomach when she saw the front of the newspaper that Gerard was reading.

“Nope… I’m just starting my investigation,” Gerard replied not looking to Isla, he had no idea what he would ever do if he didn’t do this; he had questions that had never been answered and he still wanted someone to suffer for what they had done.

“Your investigation…” Isla whispered breathlessly, she felt sick staring at Gerard knowing that if he dug far enough then he would find out who she was; she was innocent but she doubted that he would listen to that.

Gerard nodded his head and looked at Isla, he didn’t notice that she looked a little ill and he closed the newspaper that he was reading to move on to the next one; he was angry that the name of the nurse that had killed Isabel wasn’t printed.

“I want to find the nurse that took Isabel from me,” Gerard explained flashing a smile to Isla, he opened the next newspaper wondering why the woman had been given such anonymity when her mistakes had led to Isabel’s death.

Isla stared at Gerard, she had no idea what he planned to do but she truly hoped that Gerard never found out that she was the woman that he was now searching for. 

###

Author's Note:

Can't believe it's been two years since Milan Piqué Mebarak was born.