Soulmates - Cai Bing

4. Heartbeat

You smile as you greet Cai Bing and bow. Then, you turn to the remaining staff and greet them too. You look back at Cai Bing, she looks confused and surprised that you are here. Before you can explain why you came, you noticed that her eyes were red and puffy, like she had just finished crying.

"Why why why, what's wrong? Are you okay?" you ask her in mandarin as you quickly walk over to her. This is the closest you've ever been. You guys are around the same height, but you're slightly taller than her.

"I'm okay...thank you...I'm just frustrated...I feel like I'm a burden to my team...I'm always making mistakes" she says as tears begin to form in her eyes.

"That's not true, you're not a burden at all...don't think like that because it's not true, you're doing a great job...it's not easy to prepare so much in such little time" you say as you pull her close to you and hug her tight. You hold her tight and rub her back until she stops sniffling.

That's when you both realize what just happened and you just hoped she couldn't hear how fast your heart was beating. You quickly walk to the counter at the side of the practice room to grab the tissue box for her. Meanwhile, Cai Bing is thinking about how safe she felt in your arms.

You spoke to her comfortably in mandarin since you didn't think it'd make sense to speak to her in korean.

"One of the staff told me that someone was staying behind to practice, so I wanted to stay and help" you explain to her. She thanks you repeatedly and you can tell how appreciative she is.

You teach her in detail, not missing a single point. She already dances well so you guys focus more on practising her rap pronunciation and timing. You guys go over her part again and again.

It's late into the night and after practicing non stop for a few hours, you guys take a break and sit down with your backs against the wall, in the only blindspot of the room.

At this point, the main camera and audio operators have already left. It was just you, Cai Bing, and one staff member since the trainees couldn't be left alone. The staff member fell asleep, so really it just felt like you and Cai Bing.

Luckily for you, Mnet doesn't provide any translators and the only cameras that were recording were the ones mounted on the wall and they couldn't record audio since they were mainly there to record b-roll and time-lapses. This meant that you guys could talk freely without worrying about who would hear.

You guys start chatting and you're surprised at how easy it is to talk to her. You find out that her personality type is ESFJ while yours is ISFJ. You often repress your feelings and don't open up to many people, but with her you're not afraid to share. You guys talked about anything and everything, from both of your childhoods until now. You took turns asking each other questions and answering them. 

Although, you were still confused as to why Cai Bing asked if you knew Jiwon personally outside of the show.

"When we are away from the cameras, you can just call me by my name or my Chinese name, Y/CN" you tell her. You guys agree to speak casually with one another off camera, like good friends who've known each other forever. That's how it felt anyways after the evening you guys just shared.

"You know, you really did blow me away at the first performance...you're gonna make it big I just know it" you say while turning to her. "I really couldn't take my eyes off of you...you're so talented so don't be so hard on yourself, I know you can do it" you say as you give her thigh a squeeze.

Before you can take your hand off, she grabs it with hers.

"Thank you for staying to help me" she says. You smile back at her and say, "it's my pleasure". She puts her head on your shoulder and you rest your head on hers. 

My heart's on fire for your love, I wish that you would love me, you thought.

What was supposed to be a five minute break ended up being much longer.

After a minute or two in that position, you guys got up and went to practice a little bit more before calling it a night. Once you guys finished, you gently went to wake up the staff member who fell asleep. You ask the staff member how she's getting home. She says she'll probably take a taxi, so you offer to share a taxi ride home.

You and the staff member walk Cai Bing to her dorm room and you give her one last hug goodnight. It feels so good to have her in your arms.

"I want to see you again" you whisper in her ear before letting go.