This was another request from @frak44
Now loading: Kids Next Door mission: Operation B.U.L.L.I.E.S.Big
Ugly
Lunks
Like
Intimidating
Entrapped
ScaredycatsA flying machine lands and it lowers Hoagie, Wally, and Alastor on a covered cage. They jump down.
Jerry: Thank you for answering my distress call, I don't know how the disgusting creature escaped. Very embarrassing. Very embarrassing indeed.
Wally: Your Noogieraptor here was stalking a group of kindergartners. We captured him just as he bared his knuckles.
Jerry: Noogieraptor. I see you're an amateur bullyologist.
Wally: Takes one to know one.
Wally and Hoagie laugh.
Alastor: I have a complaint about your Noogieraptor.
Jerry: Let me guess, you got a noogie, princess?!
Jerry laughs as Alastor growls, her nose drips blood and gets out a hockey stick from behind her, she twirls it around her fingers and holds it up to Jerry's face.
Alastor: Don't call me princess. I'm the writer of my own fairytale, got that, amateur?!
Jerry: Y-Y-Yes ma'am.
Alastor lowers the hockey stick.
Alastor: You're a fast learner.
Jerry: What was your compliant again?
Alastor: The most effective way to fully noogie a victim, is to headlock them first. Like this!
Alastor headlocks Hoagie and gives him a noogie.
Hoagie: Hey! Cut it out, Numbuh 6! The Noogieraptors might start mistaking you for one of their own.
Alastor: That would be helpful during an encounter.
Jerry: Bullies are filthy beasts. They're barely even human!
Jerry pulls back the tarp on the cage to reveal the Noogieraptor growling.
Jerry: Get back you animal! Back I say!
Jerry electrocutes the Noogieraptor with his cane.
Hoagie: So, uh, who are you? And what is this place?
Jerry: My name is Jerry Rassic. And this is Bully Island!
Everyone walks to and gets into a jeep as they start driving.
Jerry: I've created this facility as my science fair project, it's just me and my sister, Liza, here. Raising new strains of bullies. If we could only figure out what makes the bully tick, then weaker kids might have a chance in this world.
Hoagie: Scientist to scientist, I'd be interested to take a look at your data, and discuss methodology.
Wally: Ugh! This place is starting to sound more like Nerd Island to me!
Alastor: I'm gonna have to agree with Numbuh 4. I'm normally down for some science equations and data research, but, not counting what bullies hate the most, I don't see the point of researching them.
Wally: See! Numbuh 6 gets it!
Jerry: This island is a living breathing bully habitat. We even have a Wedgiesaurus Rex.
Wally: Whoa! I thought they were all in permanent detention?!
Alastor: Last time I checked they were! Este lugar está ficando cada vez melhor! (This place keeps getting better and better)!
Jerry: They are. Except this one. Maybe you'll get to meet him, but in the meantime, you'll all like this! It's testing time!
Two dummies swing on a swing set as two Spitballosaurus come out of the bushes.
Wally: Spitballosaurus!
The Spitballosaurus sniff around and rapidly spitball the dummies.
Hoagie: Eughhh! That's horrible! Jerry, you're completely surrounded by bullies here! Don't you ever worry about your own safety?
Jerry: No, no. Everything on Bully Island is perfectly safe. I'll show you.
They drive to an observation lab and go inside.
Jerry: Bully Island is built like a giant prison. Keeping the animals inside and us, outside. I assure you, everything is appositively absolutely-
He gets cut off by a red light blaring.
Jerry: Oh my! Office station 0. My sister's up there. You have to safe her, I beg of you.
Jerry hands Wally a ray gun.
Jerry: Here. Take this weapon. It'll ward off bullies by projecting a hologram of the school principal.
Hoagie: Are you sure it works?
Alastor: I can tinker around with it.
Hoagie: Not that! I'm kinda wedgiephobic!
Jerry: Absolutely! Take my jeep and stay on course with this map.
Wally: No problem. We'll have your sister back safely before you can say purple nurple.
Alastor: It's our job to protect kids from adults and even worse, teenagers.
They drive off without Jerry.
Wally: Just a little further, Numbuh 2. There!
They come up to the office station.
Wally: This must be the place.
Alastor types in her wrist communicator.
Alastor: Matches the picture, and my scanning says there's someone in there, must be Liza.
They hop out of the jeep.
Wally: Stay close.
Alastor walks close to Wally as Hoagie whimpers and hugs both of them, squishing them together. Wally elbows Hoagie away.
Wally: Not that close! What's the matter with you?!
Alastor: Gotta conquer that fear, Numbuh 2.
Wally and Alastor walk ahead as Hoagie whimpers and runs after them. They all run inside the building, not knowing that a Spitballosaurus followed them. Inside the building, the even Sector V operatives run up the stairs.
Wally: Liza! Liza, is that you? Hey, we're here to save you.
"Liza" falls over, revealing that she was a dummy, and Wally yelps. The digital map beeps as Jerry pops up on the screen.
Jerry: I do apologize for my sister's behavior, she's a bit of a dummy.
Jerry laughs and snorts, hurting his back in the process.
Hoagie: Jerry! What's going on here?
Jerry: Revenge! Revenge for the wedgie I got back in first grade from you, Wallabee Beetles!
Wally: Uhhh, and when did I give you a wedgie?
Jerry: FIRST GRADE!! But back then I looked different, I looked normal. Until you gave me the worse wedgie of my life! Doctors tried to remove the underwear for hours but to no avail. And so, I've been forced to live with the agony of a permanent wedgie for life. But now, Wallabee Beetles, the underwear is on other foot. And judging by her knowledge of how to give a proper noogie and the fact that she helped Wallabee Beetles give me that wedgie, I'm keeping you there too, uh, oh come on, I must've heard it sometime today. What's your name again, princess?
Alastor: Princess. Princess!
Alastor's nose starts to bleed.
Wally and Hoagie: Uh oh.
Alastor: Don't call me PRINCESS! I thought you learned your lesson back at the entrance! Looks like my knuckle sandwich will have to go farther than the underwear, so the underwear and sandwich will meet in the middle and play an accordion outta your body!
Jerry laughs.
Jerry: I'd like to see you try, princess. I'm sorry Hoagie, we could've been friends, but you should know better than to hang out with bullies. Buh bye.
Jerry ends the call as the Spitballosaurus' come closer.
Hoagie: Spitballosaurus', what'll we do?!
Alastor: I'll tell you what we're gonna do. We're gonna defend ourselves against them for as long as we can and I'm giving Jerry that knuckle sandwich I promised him.
Wally: I agree, with most of that. We stay and fight, bullies always respect ya if you don't run.
Alastor: You gotta show that you're the bigger person.
Wally: Exactly! Are ya with us, Numbuh 2?! Numbuh 2?
Hoagie runs out to the jeep and tries to start it. Wally grabs him by the shirt collar as he yelps.
Hoagie: Noooo!
Alastor holds her hockey stick up to Hoagie's face.
Wally: I told you to stay close!
Alastor: But not too close.
The ground rumbles as a bully appears in the objects in mirror are closer than they appear mirror, it gets closer as Hoagie screams.
Wally: It's a Wet Willy Mammoth! Alright Numbuh 2, although I don't like running, in this case-hey!
Hoagie starts to run away as Wally tugs on Alastor's scarf.
Wally: Come on, Numbuh 6, we don't want-Huh?
Alastor yells and runs at the Wet Willy Mammoth, blocking its sloppery finger with her hockey stick and hitting it on the head with it.
Wally: Uh, Numbuh 6?
Alastor: That's so it doesn't follow us and so Jerry knows what I can do to his dumb bullies.
Wally: Right. Come on now!
Wally and Alastor run after Hoagie.
Wally: Wait for us! Huh?
The Wet Willy Mammoth is now up and it stomps on the jeep and prepares its wet willy finger.
Wally: Alright you cruddy spit bug, try some of this!
Wally shoots the projector gun as a banner that says kick me pops out.
Wally: Ah crud!
Alastor holds her hockey stick out as the Wet Willy Mammoth whimpers and backs away.
Wally: Is it, scared of you, Numbuh 6?
Alastor: Guess no one's ever stuck up to it before.
Alastor lowers her stick as the Wet Willy Mammoth resumes its chase, making Wally drop the useless weapon and pulls Alastor along with him, screaming. They try to run to the gate, only to find Spitballosaurus' there with their spitting straws resting proud in their mouths. The male operatives scream while Alastor bares her hockey stick, the boys drag her down as the Spitballosaurus' spitball the Wet Willy Mammoth. The operatives run past the Spitballosaurus' as they are shocked they just spitballed a fellow bully.
Wally: I told you to wait up!
Hoagie yells and falls down into a ditch Wally dives down the ditch as Alastor scales down, using her hockey stick to scale down the side. Wally slides down, bumping into a rock and falling on Hoagie as Alastor jumps down next to them.
Hoagie: Why did we have to come to this dumb island anyway?! I wish bullies never existed.
Wally: Blame your own kind! If nerds weren't so, uh, nerdlyish, then there would be no need for bullies to be uh, bullyish.
Hoagie: Don't try to blame this whole thing on me! You're the one who gave Jerry a wedgie in the first place.
Wally: He deserved it! And when I get my hands on that twerp, I'm gonna remove that permanent wedgie and give it to him again!
Alastor: Along with my accordion knuckle sandwich! Teach him who to call princess.
Hoagie: I can't believe you're actually agreeing with Numbuh 4, Numbuh 6, you hardly bully anyone.
Wally and Alastor look at each other than at Hoagie then laugh.
Hoagie: What?!
Wally: Numbuh 6 bullies people all the time!
Alastor: I think Jerry's calling me princess since, I was Numbuh 4's henchman when we were in first grade. We befriended each other after he was impressed by me missing every spitball he threw, dodging every wedgie but give him one for even thinking about giving me one, blah blah blah, yadda yadda.
Hoagie: You two were bully duos?!
Wally: Yep, and no kid went unbullied by the bullying duo of Lenore and Wallabee.
Alastor and Wally laugh.
Wally: Good times. However, the duo broke up after second grade since, well, I never saw Numbuh 6 again until she joined the Kids Next Door.
Alastor: Yeah that, my Avó (Grandma) was worried about us getting injured so started homeschooling my siblings and I.
Wally: I could've really used your great bullying methods in the second and third grade but I get it, you had other stuff.
Alastor: So Wallabee, you feel like bullying another for old time sake?
Wally: Do I?!
Hoagie: Well, save seconds for me!
Hoagie's fist meets his palm.
Wally: You got it!
Alastor: Of course!
The boys hike their pants up as Alastor bonks them on the head with her hockey stick.
Alastor: Hurry up! Unless you want to be a bullies snack time.
Wally: Come on! We'll get out of this yet.
The boys pull back bushes to the observation lab.
Hoagie: Look at that! Jerry's control room. Quick! Over the fence!
Wally runs into the fence and gets electrocuted.
Alastor: This seems like a job for, vault jumping!
Hoagie: Numbuh 4!
Hoagie yelps as a Wedgiesaurus Rex steps in front of Wally's fried body.
Hoagie: It's a Wedgiesaurus Rex!
Wally: Don't make an sudden moves. They respond to motion.
The Wedgiesaurus Rex sniffs around and sniffs Wally's unmoving body then walks away.
Hoagie: Phew!
The Wedgiesaurus Rex roars at the children as Hoagie screams and runs away.
Wally: Get back here, you coward!
Alastor: Looks like it's all up to us, Numbuh 4.
Wally: Seems like it, Numbuh 6. I have a plan, we get-
Alastor yells and starts ambushing the Wedgiesaurus Rex with her hockey stick.
Wally: That works too, I guess. Wait a minute.
Wally thinks back to how the Wet Willy Mammoth acted after Alastor ambushed it.
Wally: I see what she's doing, she's being the bigger person. Way to go....Numbuh 6. Ah crud.
The Wedgiesaurus Rex picks up Wally and starts giving him various kinds of wedgies.
Wally: Oh please no, oh please no, noooo! Not the classic wedgie! No, not the reverse!
Alastor keeps hitting the Wedgiesaurus Rex with her hockey stick.
Alastor: Let him go, ugly!
Wally: Anything but the around the world wedgie! Please! Not the yo-yo wedgie! Have mercy!
Alastor: Hey! Wedgiesaurus!
The Wedgiesaurus Rex looks at Kimi as she moved the hair from her face, makes her eyes bigger and sad and pouts her lip.
Alastor: Please don't hurt my friend, who's being mean to you?
The Wedgiesaurus Rex picks up Alastor with one hand and keeps giving Wally different wedgies with the other.
Wally: You call that a plan!
Alastor: It's that Jerry guy, ain't it? He's so mean to you bullies and expects you to work for him, I say you retaliate and bully him. He deserves every kind of wedgie you offer!
Alastor moves her hair back over her green eye.
Wally: Yeah, what she said! You stop giving me wedgies and give them to Jerry! Not the wedgie on the beach! I thought you liked her!
The Wedgiesaurus Rex puts sand down Wally's pants.
Alastor: He's testing the wedgies for Jerry on you.
Wally: Are you sure that's all he's doing?! No, no, anything but the Texas wedgie! Not a Reggie Wedgie! I can't feel my butt cheeks!
Hoagie: Hey! Wedgiesaurus! Put those tighty whiteys down! I did your homework for you!
The Wedgiesaurus Rex drops Wally and stomps over to Hoagie.
Wally: Oh, my bottom!
Alastor: You ok, Numbuh 4? That Wedgiesaurus really stretched out your roupa íntima (underwear), huh?!
Wally: Yeah, but what kind of plan did you have back there?!
Alastor: A well thought out one.
The Wedgiesaurus Rex inspects the homework.
Wedgiesaurus: No like homework!
Jerry: Why did you stop? Who told you to stop, you big ugly drooling monster! Wedgimatize them!
Alastor: Who you going listen to; Jerry, who treats you all horrible or me, who treats you like the respected bullies you are.
Jerry: Don't listen to the princess. You would be nothing without me!
The Wedgiesaurus Rex gets closer to the operatives as the boys whimper.
Wally: No, not again!
The boys hug Alastor out of fear, squishing her between them. The Wedgiesaurus Rex roars as multiple bully-saur's come out. Hoagie gasps.
Wally: Numbuh 2, I think you're gonna have to do a lot more homework!
The Wet Willy Mammoth gasps and runs in front of the operatives, roaring at the other bullies.
Hoagie: What's it doing?
Wally: I think it respects Numbuh 6 from standing up from it.
The Wet Willy Mammoth picks up Alastor and puts her on its shoulder.
Hoagie and Wally: Numbuh 6!
The Wedgiesaurus Rex then picks up Alastor and holds her up as the other bullies cheer.
Wally: Woah! Numbuh 6, you're like a queen or something. (A/N: The queen idea was not mine, it was Frak44's, I liked it a lot so I decided to incorporate it into the story but still think they should get credited)
Alastor: Yeah, a queen.
The bullies roar agreements.
Hoagie: So Bully Queen, what do you suppose they do first?
Alastor: How about we get a little help on the permanent wedgie accordion knuckle sandwich scheme, Numbuh 4?
The Wedgiesaurus Rex picks up the boys as they ride on his shoulders.
Wally: I'm down for anything that doesn't give me another wedgie!
Hoagie: Oh come on, you didn't think I'd abandon ya, didn't ya?
Wally: Well I kinda did, you've been doing it all day.
Hoagie jumps off the Wedgiesaurus Rex's shoulder and runs away, screaming.
Wally: There you go again!
Hoagie climbs back up the Wedgiesaurus Rex's shoulder.
Hoagie: Just kidding. Come on.
They all jump down and run away. They come across Jerry stealing their ship.
Wally: Oh crud! He's taking our only ticket out of here!
The bullies jump up and attack the ship, bringing it down so the operatives can jump inside.
Jerry: Have a nice zap!
Jerry electrocuted the operatives, with Alastor laughing, as they land on a trapdoor.
Jerry: See you next fall!
Jerry pulls a lever, making the operatives fall through the trapdoor, screaming with Alastor's being out of joy. They almost fall out until Wally's underwear catches on the door.
Wally: Just my luck, a flying wedgie.
Alastor: Hey bullies! The boy you want is in there but you have to save them from falling to certain doom.
Hoagie pulls Wally up by the underwear and Alastor gets a lift from the Wedgiesaurus Rex.
Alastor: I only meant you guys, I'm completely fine with falling to certain doom.
Wally: Don't just stand there! Punch it!
They take off, leaving Jerry all alone on the island. The Wet Willy Mammoth waves while the Wedgiesaurus Rex cries.
Wedgiesaurus Rex: New friends and queen leave.
Wally: Uh Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 6? Can you guys, uh promise never to tell any of the others what happened today?
Hoagie: As far as I'm concerned, this mission is all behind you, I mean us.
Hoagie laughs as they fly off.End transmission
Trivia
- Wally and Alastor have known each other since first grade
- The bullying duo of Lenore and Wallabee is like the criminal couple Bonnie and Clyde
- It's revealed that Alastor went to first grade before being homeschooled
- Alastor was on both sides. Hoagie was on the nerds side while Wally was on the bullies side. However, Alastor leaned more toward the bully side in this case
- Alastor becomes Queen of the Bullies after she stood up to them
- Alastor's name is only said once in this episode as she was either referred to by her codename or Princess
- Alastor hates being called princess
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