Heartbreak Weather -N.H

song writing & golf

Chapter 10

January 7, 2019

NIALL'S POV:

I took yesterday to just rest after the party. I had a terrible hangover but now all I want to do is write. I've been writing for hours and I feel like the lyrics are just pouring out of me. I finished a song titled nice to meet ya but I feel like it's missing something. Skylar is running through my mind and all I have wanted to do is write about her. I start to strum the guitar to go through the song again.

"I like the way you talk, I like the things you wear I want your number tattooed on my arm in ink, I swear 'Cause when the morning comes, I know you won't be there. Every time I turn around, you disappear."

"I wanna blow your mind, just come with me, I swear I'm gonna take you somewhere warm, you know j'adore la mer 'Cause when the morning comes, I know you won't be there. Every time I turn around, you disappear."

"Nice to meet ya."

"Nice to meet ya, what's your name? Let me treat ya to a drink."

"I like the way you talk, I like the things you wear I want your number tattooed on my arm in ink, I swear 'Cause when the morning comes, I know you won't be there. Every time I turn around, you disappear."

"Nice to meet ya."

"One minute, you're there, the next one, you're gone. Been waiting for you all night, so come on You know what I need, you know what I want. You know what I need now. You know what I need now."

"Nice to meet ya, what's your name? Let me treat ya, to a drink."

"Nice to meet ya. Where ya been?  Let me treat ya, to a drink. Nice to meet ya."

This song is missing something but I'm not sure what it is. I decide to move on from nice to meet ya feeling stuck on it. I start writing a new song. I start humming while strumming the guitar and let the lyrics start to flow out as I think of them.

"I need a new angel. A touch of someone else to save me from myself. I need a new angel. A touch I've never felt, baby, can you tell that."

I stop strumming to write down the lyrics before I forget them. The tune is now stuck in my head. I'm thinking of Lexi but I'm also thinking of how when I'm around Skylar the thoughts of Lexi fade away, my minds at ease. It's almost as if Skylar slows down all the thoughts running in my mind and I can relax. I don't know how she does it when I don't know much about her. I think it's just how she carries herself. She's not hard to talk to unless you piss her off which is understandable. I know I can't like her but I think I'm starting to. I pick the guitar up again to play the same tune. I pull more lyrics out of myself trying to get a chorus out of it. After strumming for a while I start to sing out again.

"Each time I close my eyes, she's in there running wild. I'm hoping you get her out of my mind. I need a new angel. I need a new angel."

Once I write the lyrics down into my journal I write at the top of the page "New Angel". I smile to myself feeling happy to be writing and not stuck. Sometimes I have days where nothing really comes to me. But I also have days like today where it comes easily. I guess I can thank Skylar for that. I think for a second about calling her after I'm done writing but I second guess myself once again and decide against it.

Ever since Skylar and I's fight she's pushed a lot of thoughts of Lexi out of my head. Skylar seems to just push her way into my brain somehow. Maybe eventually I won't worry about Lexi as much and it feels like a relief. I still miss being friends with her but she ignores me every time I try to reach out and it fucking sucks. I know I look like a dumb ass trying to be friends with my cheating ex but she used to be a great friend. I shake my head wanting Lexi to leave my thoughts. I start strumming the guitar again trying to think of anything else. How do both of them roam my mind at the same time. It's like when I'm with Skylar she can distract my thoughts and when I'm not with her all the thoughts come back.

"Too many hours in the night. Every second is about her, every thought is wrapped around her. Too many feelings in the light. I just need a new distraction and I like the way you're dancing."

I smile to myself thinking of all the times I've seen Skylar dance around when she's drunk. She just lets go when she's drunk and doesn't have a care in the world.  I find myself trying to figure out ways I can spend more time with her. I just want to listen to her talk, learn more about her. I have lyrics in my head and I'm almost scared to sing them. It won't happen but I can still think about it right?

"I'll give you what's left of me, cause you feel so heavenly. I don't know what's best for me but maybe it's time."

I start arrange the lyrics how I want them placed in my journal and continue singing more as it comes.

"I think I saw you in my dreams. Didn't know what I've been missing, til you walked in like a vision. You give me something out of reach. Just keep doing what you're doing, cause you move me when you're moving."

I finish writing everything out in my journal laying out the song how I want it and once I'm satisfied I close my journal and put it away. I move over to my couch carrying my guitar with me looking out the windows as the sunlight beams into the house. I turn the tv to watch some gulf. As I'm sat on the couch watching gulf I strum my guitar quietly. This is how the rest of my night is gonna go, pure relaxation.