Heartbreak Weather -N.H

just take the pain away

A/N: ouch is all I have to say.

Chapter 40

Harry's POV:

I exit the house and immediately begin to run. To where that might be, I don't know. But I need out of the house. The sound of the material of my windbreaker rubbing against each other fills my ears.

The house gets further and further behind me and I feel relieved. I can't escape my thoughts and I feel as though I'm going insane.

Stella why must you swarm my thoughts?

The hair that usually hangs in front of my face is tied up on top of my head.

The cool air fills my lungs as I breathe in through my nose. The sun is setting and the sky burst with color. What a beautiful day to feel absolutely miserable.

As I run past people I see her face everywhere.

Stella get out of my head.

I swear I hear her laugh and my throat gets tight.

Run.

My mind races faster than my feet. My breathing quickens trying to appease my need for oxygen. The wind blows past my face and my eyes dart everywhere around me.

My steps pound in time with my heartbeat. The more I think of her, the harder I push myself.

Breathe Harry.

I take a deep breath and feel my lungs expand. I pump my legs gaining momentum with each push. I quicken my pace and my steps turn into leaps. My heart races in my chest but I'm not slowing down. I don't need a break, I need my thoughts to be clear. It's as if my thoughts aren't my own. I can hear her voice and I close my eyes for a second as things blur when I run past them.

I dart past people and buildings. I run so fast I feel as if my legs are going to explode but I don't care. I can't even fully comprehend what is going on around me. I can't think straight. I want this to stop.

Adrenaline courses through my veins. A thin layer of sweat covers the nape of my neck. I can feel my whole body working as I run. My leg muscles run warm, fresh air enters my lungs and blood flows into all of my limbs.

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

It's like I have to keep reminding myself to breathe air in through my nose. Running is supposed to help. Why isn't it helping? I'm going to fucking scream.

Without thinking I go to cross the street with a head full of fog. A horn honks and it's like I'm moving in slow motion as I turn my head to see the car that almost hit me. I don't even apologize, I just keep running as I hear them yell.

Why did I even cross the street? Where am I going? Where am I at? I can't think. I can't focus on my breathing anymore. I run until I get to a dead street. I turn into an alleyway and slap my hands against the brick and let out a scream.

I scream from all the pain. Scream for Stella. Scream for Michelle. Scream for Skylar. Scream for myself. It's too much, it's agonizing. I can't handle the pain, it's going to swallow me hole. My fist bangs against the brick until I see blood. My can't suppress my yells. I let it out. I can't hold it in anymore.

"WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME?" I shout and watch as blood drips down my fingers from constantly punching a brick wall.

I'm angry and in agony. I scream and I scream. I'm thankful I turned down a dead street so no would bother asking if I'm okay because I'm not. I don't want to talk to people. I don't want to see anyone. I want Stella.