All or Nothing

18

I made a bee-line for the training field, knowing no one would be there. Once outside, I found the old silver bleachers coated in a thin layer of dust and sat down. My hands smacked my head, yanking my mask down, as I tried to get rid of her.

"You know why I had to do it!" I cried softly, trying to be quiet, "I was young and scared that I was just in love because he was nice to me! You were there!"

I smacked at my head roughly, "I had to go to school, get older, make sure my heart was in the right place! He's too important to just throw myself at him! I could've seriously hurt him back then."

At that point I was sobbing, my chest heaving from me trying to keep quiet, "I love him," I wept softly, "I love him."

"Ms. Akahanna?" A rough but concerned voice called to me.

I jumped, immediately hiding my face, "I'm ok," I sputtered in embarrassment.

I heard footsteps grow closer, "You don't have to lie, I could hear you crying," he huffed, "aren't hero's supposed to always tell the truth or some shit?" I focused on him, seeing that it was Bakugo.

I wiped the tears from my face, sniffling, "What are you doing here?"

"Aizawa wanted to, but he wouldn't leave the rest of them alone by themselves, and I wouldn't either. The extras are fucking stupid."

I snorted softly, "And he sent you?"

"I volunteered," he stated awkwardly, scratching the back of his neck.

I raised my eyebrows in surprise and turned my head to face him, "Huh," I pondered that as I read his face, "Well thank you, but I'm ok. It's just a thing I deal with a lot. My mind isn't all that great."

He walked around and sat on the bleachers beside me, "You can like, talk to me or whatever. I don't like people so who am I gonna tell?"

I followed him with my head and smiled softly at him, "Really?"

He shrugged and crossed his arms over his chest as he rested his back against the step behind him, acting like it was so obvious, "Duh."

I snorted again but louder then nodded, "Alright," I leaned back with him, "First how much did you hear? It's ok, you can be honest."

"As if I'd be anything else," he huffed, "I ran after you almost immediately, so I think I heard everything. Was it those dunces that made you upset? Did they make you feel embarrassed? I'll kill them—"

"Bakugo," I laughed softly, "slow down."

He coughed a little and shifted around, "M'Sorry."

I shook my head, "To answer your question: no. It wasn't them," I took a deep breath, "I have a disorder called D.I.D., Dissociative Identity Disorder. Do you know what that is?"

He looked a little confused and shook his head, I nodded and pushed some hair behind my ear, "It's a disorder characterized by the presence of two or more distinct personality states. It's usually a reaction to trauma as a way to block out certain terrible events that happen in the early stages of your life."

He made an O face and nodded, he seemed to be listening intently and I continued, "I've known I've had it since high school. I don't know how long I'd had it before then, but I figured it out once I started sparring people. I've done a lot of damage because of it," I trailed off a little, rubbing my arms sadly, "I have an alter that's aggressive, harsh, and very judgmental of my life choices. She started whispering in my ear while in the classroom and I knew I had to leave before it got bad."

"What was she saying?" He had sat a little more forward now, "Who was she talking about?"

I looked over at him again and I paused, pondering if I could tell this little angsty boy about my love life, I decided on a short version, "Mr. Aizawa."

He nodded and sat back a little, "I knew it."

I laughed a little and rolled my eyes, "You did huh?"

"You two gawk at each other all the time, like earlier in class," he shrugged, "You're really obvious. Raccoon eyes and pink cheeks are trying to bet on who's gonna accidentally slip up on given names first."

I cackled a little and shook my head in fake disbelief, "Wow, dad was right, I really am blind."

"Huh?" He looked confused.

"Nothing," I giggled, "Anyway, yeah. She was talking about Aizawa."

He moved to stand, turning fully to me, "If you were trying to not hurt him, I'd say it's a good enough reason to whatever you had to do," He glared off to the side, "Of course, I don't really care much about love, but everyone would have to be brain dead to not see how in love you two are. It makes me wanna vomit sometimes."

I grinned, rolling my eyes as I stood, looking up at him, "You really are a teenage boy," I patted his arm as I lifted my mask back up, "Thank you, for coming to talk to me. It helped a lot."

He huffed and stuck up his nose, "Of course it did."

I rolled my eyes and took him back to class; I really did appreciated him coming after me. I originally thought he didn't even like me, so it was a pleasant surprise to find that he actually did. Why else would King Explosion Murder come to aid little old me in distress?

Once back, Bakugo proceeded to shove the door open, "Ok extras she's fine, leave her alone will ya?" He yelled as he stomped over to his desk. I smirked at him endearingly as I watched him sit at his desk. It hit me then that he was sitting in my old desk, and I knew it was mine because there was a small dent in the side of it.

"H-," Aizawa paused then continued, "Akahanna, are you alright?"

I looked over and nodded softly, "Yeah, I'm alright."