The Dove And The Grenade.

Chapter 19: Save Me.

"What are we going to do?" Matt asked hoarsely, his voice barely made words. He stared wide eyed at her with his hands dug deep inside of his pockets. Eliese sat there with tears forming in her eyes, she felt the long visited but familiar feeling of fear and anxiety wash over her. She remembered it from when she was pregnant with Emily. She didn't know why she was so afraid of pregnancy in general, but she was. As many times as Eliese told herself that she doesn't want to have another baby, now that she's pregnant she was excited to be a mommy again. But she was also scared of who the father was. She still didn't know. If she is pregnant with Andrew's baby, then she's six months along. But if she's pregnant with Matt's baby, then she is early in her pregnancy.

"I don't know." She whispered softly. Matt watched the small woman mentally spin the wheels in her head so fast she didn't process any of this. Matt knew that she was scared, but he didn't know exactly how scared she was. He was jumping for joy in his mind because he's going to be a daddy, he didn't think that there was a possibility of not being this baby's father. But Eliese did, and that was killing her inside.

"I think we should make an appointment to make sure everything is alright with you and the baby." Matt thought of the most logical thing. Eliese absently nodded and stared into space. In her head everything was making sense, the last six months have been hell for her and it's because she's been pregnant this whole time.

'The mood swings, the sore back and hips, the swollen feet, the cravings and the sleeping patterns. They've all been out of whack because I've been pregnant the entire time!' Eliese was jumping to conclusions. She knew it was Andrew's baby. Her mood swings started before she and Matt had sex for the first time.

'It's Andrew's, there is no doubt in my mind, it's his.' She thought solemnly. She was sure that this baby belonged to Andrew. It terrified her to think that he could get back into her life using this baby. It terrified her to think that he could abuse this baby the way he did to her. She couldn't let that happen.

"I'm scared, Matty." Eliese managed to pipe up before Matt left the bathroom. He cocked his head to the side and scrunched his eyebrows together confusedly. He didn't understand why she was scared. He thought she'd be happy to be having a baby with him.

"Why?" Matt asked firmly. Eliese looked up to him with blurry vision and a fearful look on her face. Tears started to stream down her face as a manic smile twisted her mouth widely. She was hit with an irrational mood swing. She went from being sad and scared to being annoyed and frustrated but she couldn't get the smile off of her face. She shook her head and looked up to him.

"Because, Matty, I'm going to be judged." She hissed at him roughly. Eliese shot up to her feet and tried to size up Matt, but she was still an entire foot shorter than him. But she was fearless. Matt didn't understand how frightening and hurtful it is to remember the names Eliese was called or how people looked down at her. He didn't remember that.

"How are you going to be judged?!" Matt exclaimed.

"People are going to look down at me once again." Eliese replied wholeheartedly. She bit at her bottom lip to stop herself from muttering under her breath. Matt threw his hands up and shrugged his shoulders. Instead of standing in the bathroom arguing with him, Eliese pushed past Matt in the doorway and made her way to the bedroom.

"Once again? Jesus Christ, Eliese, this isn't Junior High School anymore. Nobody is going to judge you." Matt meant well with his words but they came out wrong. Eliese didn't care for his tone, she zoned in on the fact that he brought up Junior High School. Eliese stopped dead in her tracks, standing in the middle of the hallway. She clenched her fists and turned on her heel to face Matt. Eliese narrowed her eyes at Matt and shot him a sharp half grin.