Two Hearts In One Home

Worrying

"What's the deal with you and Harry? Are you dating?" Niall asked on their lunch break on Monday at work. It was three days before Christmas and they had an endless stream of customers looking for presents so they had to keep an eye on the store while they hurried to eat.

"There's no deal. We're friends." Louis replied.

Niall and Liam exchanged a look.
"Alright." Niall shrugged.

Honestly, he had no idea what they were. They cuddled a lot. They talked about everything. They laughed and just got along really well and then there were those damn butterflies in his stomach that refused to go away. He wasn't a complete idiot. He knew how he felt about Harry. He was just afraid to act on it. This felt different. More. He had been in love with Ethan but not like this. If something would happen to Harry he wouldn't be able to bounce back. It would break him completely.

He decided to finally address his worries with his therapist later that day.
"I understand your fears but you have to try and let that go. You can't walk around your whole life not connecting to people because you're afraid something will happen to
them." His therapist said.

Louis rolled his eyes.
"I know but I can't control my fears."

"But you can! You can work on it, every day. Ethan died but here you are. You have dealt with it, one step at a time of the grief progress. I know it's scary but you would miss out on something great if you're too scared to love again." The therapist empathized.

"Easier said than done." Louis snorted.

"Don't rush into something. Take it slow and don't back out. If you start dating someone seriously, talk to him about your fears. If he's a good guy he'll understand." His therapist said.

"He's a great guy." Louis smiled.

"Harry?" The therapist questioned.

"Uhm yeah." Louis said.

"Don't start something before you're ready." The therapist said.

"Well, my gaydar is fucking broke. I don't know if he's into guys, into me." Louis snorted.

"I don't believe that for a second, Louis. I think you can figure that out." The therapist smiled.

Maybe he could when he felt like he could deal with that possibility. It would be easier if Harry didn't like him like that. Then he didn't have to put himself out there.

They had Christmas Eve off. Louis was going home to Doncaster to celebrate. Niall was flying home to Ireland on the 24th and he was bummed to miss Louis's birthday. The rest of the boys had decided to take him out to celebrate. They were going clubbing.

They all hurried home as soon as their work shift was over. He had just showered and got dressed when there was a knock on his front door. He went to open it. Harry had a chocolate cake in his hands and he started to sing Happy birthday.
"Thanks. You bought me a cake?" Louis said.

"I baked you one." Harry smiled.

"You baked a fucking cake? You're just perfect, aren't you?" Louis said, staring at him in surprise.

Harry's cheeks got a rosy touch. He kicked his shoes off and carried the cake to the kitchen. Louis collected plates and when he turned around Harry had lit the candle on top of the cake. Louis rolled his eyes with a fond smile. He blew it out and made a wish. They sat down and Harry sliced them a piece of cake each. They dug in and Louis almost moaned.
"This is delicious. I can't believe you made this for me."

"I used to work in a bakery as a teen." Harry grinned.

"Of course you did." Louis chuckled.

They are in silence for a while. Louis glanced at Harry.
"You're not dating anyone, right?"

Harry let out a surprised laugh.
"Where did that come from? No, I'm not dating anyone."

"Why not?" Louis asked, heart beating erratically.

"Ehm, I don't have the best track record. I tend to fall for the wrong type of guys." Harry said.

Guys! Louis's heart was dancing a fucking salsa by now.
"Wrong how?"

"Assholes, or emotionally unavailable." Harry replied and looked at him.

"That sucks!" Louis answered.

"Yeah." Harry smiled.

Louis tried to think about what to say next but a knock on the door interrupted them. He went to open it and let Liam and Zayn inside. They helped themselves to the cake and they talked and laughed until it was time to head out. They went to dinner and the boys paid for his meal as a birthday present and after that, they hit the club. Louis ordered a birthday drink and then one more. His plans to stay sober so he could drive home to Doncaster the next morning flew out the window.

They had a fun night. They danced a lot. When the night ended Louis was drunk. Liam and Zayn weren't far behind him but Harry only had non-alcoholic drinks.
"I think it's time to get you home." Harry smiled.

Louis threw his arm around him, swaying a little. They headed outside and Harry managed to get a cab to pull over. They said good night to Liam and Zayn and Harry helped him to climb in the backseat.
"Harry, I'm drunk!"

"Yep." Harry smirked.

"Not good! I can't drive home tomorrow." Louis pouted.

"I was planning on taking the train but if you want to I can drive you, if I can borrow your car and drive myself to Holmes Chapel after that?" Harry suggested.

"Yes! You're the best!" Louis grinned and rested his head against Harry's shoulder.

Harry helped him out of the car.
"Can you make it inside by yourself?"

"Nope. I want you to stay at my place." Louis slurred.

Harry hesitated briefly but then he paid the cab driver and helped Louis to get inside his apartment.

Louis crawled into bed and patted the spot next to him. Harry came to lay down. Louis immediately put his head on his chest.
"I need to hear your heartbeat."

Harry sighed.
"Alright. Good night."

"Good night."
Louis fell asleep listening to the steady beat of Harry's heart. It soothed him.