Fear & Desire ❤️‍🔥

Pep talk

You spent the rest of the day pretty much asleep. You were extremely tired considering it had been a long week of being kidnapped, beaten up, intoxicated and upset. For the first time in a while, you had a dreamless sleep.

The next morning, you were woken up by a knock at the door. Getting up, you put a dressing gown on to answer it.

"Steve" you beamed gesturing him inside "please tell me you have news" you asked desperately once he was inside.

"Unfortunately I don't" he said lowering his head.

"Oh" you said deflated as you sat on the couch.

As much as you didn't want to, you knew you had to ask, you knew you had to go back. "When can I come back?"

"Once you're completely healed y/n, don't worry we've got the best team working on finding Bucky and his captor." He said reaching out to touch your slowly healing black eye causing you to wince. "Sorry."

You noticed that Steve wasn't his usual self today. Usually he'd have that reassuring glint in his eye, that smile that just told you everything would be ok. The body language that told you he was always available. Today, all of those were absent.

"Steve, are you ok, are you looking after yourself?" You asked lifting his chin to look at you.

"Last time I spoke to him, I said some things that I regret and I told him he was done, what if—"

"Steve no, you weren't to know. Bucky knows you love him and you said those things out of anger. We will find him and he will be ok" you assured smiling at Steve who soon returned the gesture.

"So, has Loki told you what's happened?" You asked evenly trying to hide the fact that you were eager to know if Loki had told everyone what he had done. You also wanted to know everything he had been up to since you hadn't seen him. You didn't miss him or anything, you were definitely just curious.

"No, all he's said is that you're not on speaking terms."

This reminded you of the time Loki had called Bucky when you were upset after your argument. He hadn't told Bucky what he had done then just like he hasn't told Steve what he's done now. Like before, you wouldn't either.

"Oh" you replied lowering your gaze.

"What did he do y/n?" Steve said turning your gaze back to his.

"He just really hurt me" you said quietly "why does everyone eventually hurt me? What is wrong with me?

"Well whatever's happened y/n, I do know this" he smiled before talking again "nothing that's happened is because of you."

"I'm not destined for love or happy things" you scoffed "might as well give up now."

"I'm not going to hurt you, I'm not going to give up on you and I am not going to leave you y/n. Whatever Loki did, or anyone that's hurt you in the past for that matter, didn't do it because of anything you did or anything you are. You can't spend the rest of your life afraid of rejection or of someone hurting you but, you've got to start by not rejecting yourself, not hurting yourself, you do not deserve it so from now on people can either except you as you are or they can fuck off" he said firmly.

"Language!" you scolded with tears in your eyes.

"Because you y/n y/l/n are an amazing person and you are destined for love and for greatness. I love you and I'm Captain America sooo" he joked as you both hugged.

"Steve, we will find Bucky"
"We have to" he whispered.

Steve stayed for a while as you both searched through surveillance footage from the surrounding area. Surely one of the cameras must have picked up something. A phone call is what broke the concentration as Steve answered.

"Yeah sure I'll be right there" Steve said before hanging up the phone and turning to you.

"What?" You asked hopefully.

"They've found something" Steve said excitedly "we've got 3 possible locations, they're devising a plan on how we're going to check them out."

"Steve?"

"Yes y/n, you can come"