lover <3

four

***
we got home from the funeral and emily and i went up to her room to relax before dinner. i flopped down on her bed and stared at the ceiling.

she sat down next to me and opened my hand so she could trace random shapes on my palm,"hey so i wanted to tell you something."

i ran a hand through my hair before looking at her,"what's up?"

"well um, i was talking to george and he um he's going to publish my poem in The Indicator. i-it should be out next week."

i sat up and my sudden movements startled her,"emily! that's amazing, i'm so proud of you love."

"really?"

"yes are you kidding? this is incredible." i kissed her cheek then she grabbed my face to connect our lips.

we pulled away and her smile faded again,"i'm just nervous to tell my dad, you know since he's so against women following their dreams."

"well, whatever happens i'll be right here," we kissed again before emily worked on a poem while i scribbled in my notebook.

~~~

we all sat at the table eating the meal mrs. dickinson made,"this is wonderful mrs. dickinson," sue complimented with the rest of the table following with words of praise. of course mrs. dickinson swooned over our words.

a few minutes later austin tapped his glass,"um everyone, sue and i have an announcement. we have decided not to move to detroit but to stay here in amherst where i will join fathers firm."

we all cheered and i looked at sue relieved. i wasn't ready for her to be so far away from me. even though we have the dickinsons and i have emily, sue and i are the only family we have left.

after the excitement died down edward announced his campaign for congress which we all congratulated him on.

i grabbed emily's hand under the table and gave her a small nod. she took a deep breath before tapping her glass liked austin did,"um i also have an announcement." everyone turned their attention to emily.

"it's not as huge as getting married or running for congress but it's still something. a poem, a poem i wrote, will be published. next week."

i sent her a small smile while we waited for someone to speak. sue had also sent emily a small smile before edward spoke,"i'm sorry, i don't think i heard you correctly. would you say that again?"

i felt emily get tense so i gave her hand a light squeeze to let her know i was there,"i said my poem is to be published, in the college magazine." she said it with a quiet voice however she said it firmly.

and that's when all hell broke loose.

"how dare you. have i or have i not made myself quite clear that i do not approve of a woman seeking to build herself a literary reputation, emily? and now you've gone and done it!" i heard mrs. dickinson take a deep breath from the end of the table as edward continued,"is there anyway to stop this?"

emily slowly shook her head as her eyes flickered from the table to her father,"it's already gone to print."

sue and austin looked anywhere but edward or emily. lavinia directed her attention to her cat. mrs. dickinson tried to even put her breathing. i hadn't let go of emily's hand in attempt to comfort her the best i could.

"my god. you wicked girl. your mother was right. we've given you too much freedom and now you have taken advantage of our kindness. and this is a bad time emily. this is a very bad time indeed for you to exhibit such scandalous behavior! my god! you will ruin the good name of dickinson!"

and with that he slammed the table causing everything on it to shake and the plates to rattle. emily flinched and gripped my hand tighter.

everyone started to get up and take their plates to the kitchen. i was hesitant to get up but knew i would have to eventually. i squeezed her hand one last time before getting up and following everyone else out. before exiting i looked over my shoulder once more too see emily trying to control her breathing and hold back tears.

i hating seeing her like this. i wish her father would realize how much of a genius his daughter is.

~~~

we had gone up to our rooms and i could still hear edward scolding emily. i wanted to do nothing more than go down there and defend her but i knew it would only make things worse.

eventually i heard the door to edwards office slam. moments later i heard plates being smashed then the front door open and close.

~~~

about an hour later the door to me and emily's room opened and she walked in. i could tell she had been crying.

i walked up to her and hugged her tightly,"i'm sorry i couldn't do anything. i feel terrible." i have her a kiss on the head.

"i'll be alright." she spoke into my neck.

"where'd you go? it's been almost an hour." i asked as i wiped a tear from her face.

"i spoke with death."

she had told me about death before. most people call her weird or insane but i've learned to go with it. it seems to be her form of an escape from the real world.

"yeah? what'd he say?"

"just gave me some friendly advice," i kissed her forehead and went to go connect our lips when there was a knock at the door. we pulled away and emily collected herself,"um who is it?"

"it's me emily," edwards voice was heard- through the door,"may i come in?"

"sure dad."

edward walked in and remembered i was staying with emily,"oh y/n, do you mind if i speak to emily for a moment?"

"of course," i turned to emily,"i'll be in the hallway."

~~~

i had been sitting in the hallway for a few minutes. my eyes started to close when i heard the door open. edward came out and i stood up. he gave me a small nod,"goodnight y/n."

"goodnight mr. dickinson," he gave me a look to remember what he had told me the other day,"i mean, goodnight edward."

i walked back into our room and saw emily sitting on the bed. she stood up and came towards me,"how'd it go?"

"good. i'm tired let's go to bed yeah?"

i gave her a soft kiss,"yeah."

***

(sorry it took a little longer to get this out i was watching the adele concert lmao. also the ending to this was kinda weird but it's whatever)