★Loving The Bad Boy★

Goodbye, We Love You

"Darling dont be afraid, I have loved you for a thousand years" Song: A Thousand Years, Christina Perri

I stood in the hall not believing that it was real. This isn't happening and once I wake up from this dream, Baily isn't going to be dying in a hospital bed, and Nick won't be ignoring the world.

This isn't real. This isn't real. This isn't real. Wake up jess. Wake up.

This isn't exactly a surprise though. Baily called me this morning and told me that shes in the hospital. Her cancer wasn't just in her eye. It spread. And now she has a tumor. A tumor in her brain and shes dying. When I walked into the door all I could so was grab her hand and watch the rythem of her breaths. Up, down, up, down, in out, in out.

"You don't have to stare at me like that. My breathing isn't gonna be going for much longer." Baily said on a raspy voice. I don't know why she isn't taking this seriously. She doesn't seem scared, or angry, or worried.

"Baily-" I start. But the words get caught in my throat and I stare at the floor.

Suddenly the door swings open and Nick rushes inside. He stares in shock at the tubes connected to a large machine which are in baily. She has a breathing tube and an I.V. pole through her arm. He stares at me and I give him a mixed look.

"Hi Nicky." Smiles Baily.

"Hey Kitty Kat." Chokes Nick. He walks over to Baily and tries a smile but it fades instantly.

He's taking this really hard. Although I had never seen him so sensative. Or sensitive at all...

He glances over at me and I want to look away but I can't seem to peel my gaze away from him. His dark hair I ruffled and his eyes are misty green. I dont think he cares that I'm staring at him.

"My baby." Sniffles a soft voice from the hall.

I peek my head through the door and a lady maybe in her late 20s squeezes tightly to a man who seems just about the same age. I notice streaks of tears running down her cheek. Shes clutching onto two small baby booties. She must've had a miscarriage. My heart sinks and I slip back into the room.

"And I will never forget the time when-" Baily cheers to Nick. They must be talking about memories.

"Baily where is your family?" I ask interupting their conversation.
"There speaking to the doctor a few rooms down." She says quietly.

"Oh." Is all I could say. I walked over to the window and stared at the storm clouds forming in the gray Oregon sky. The weather is always rainy but today it seemed almost planned. Like god was preparing for Baily. Just like he did for my dad. And the child of the couple in the hallway. I'm not one to get so emotional, but if Nick can then so can I.

"Hey cutie." Baily's dad says walking into the room along with Hannah, and her mother.

"Hi daddy!" Smiled Baily. Tears welled up into my eyes and a tried to shuffle into the hall as quiet as possible. I shoved open the back door and grasped onto the small gate circling the hospital. I felt like the world was swirling me inside. I dont cry, but I get the urge to gasp for air like I'm being choked by my emotions. I have lost my dad, almost my sister, my trust, and now I'm gonna loose Baily.

I lift my head up as small raindrops fall onto my hands and cheeks. Suddenly Nicks walks up beside me. I look up at him.

"You ok?" He asks. He no longer seems sensitive, but like a stone rock. Like he's nothing but a brick.