Déjà Vu

--waterfalls coming out your mouth

there are some slurs in this chapter, just be warned. also, mentions of neglect.

 And there was Veronica, a foreign figure cooking in Matthias' kitchen, black hair cascading to her shoulders in spirals, bouncing as she talked animatedly with Maike. It was odd to come downstairs and see someone who wasn't a Kohler, Bondevik, or Oxenstjärna in the house to say the least, but Lukas could already tell that Veronica was someone that made Maike very happy.

"Whoa! This is her?" Matthias asked, shoving past Lukas and practically tripping down the remainder of the stairs. Lukas winced and followed behind him, rubbing his side where Matthias had elbowed him. "She's so pretty, Maike!"

Veronica snickered and wiggled her fingers at the strawberry blonde boy, then at Lukas. "Nice to meet you too. I'm assuming you're Matthias and you're Lukas?"

"Ja," Lukas came to a standstill next to Matthias, who was rocking back and forth on his heels. "Maike's been talking about me?"

"Mostly good things, don't worry," Veronica replied, offering Lukas a grin. "No, but seriously, it's good to meet you both. I've heard a lot about you and your relationship."

"It's sure been a ride," Maike shrugged, "a lot to tell. But remember- it's still new, so don't give them too much grief."

Matthias chose that moment to sling an arm around Lukas' shoulders and press a kiss to his cheek, putting Lukas on the spot in front of this random lady he'd only just met. Even if she was Maike's girlfriend, it still made Lukas uncomfortable--he pulled away from Matthias with a flushed face and sat down at the kitchen table.

"Aw," Maike, Matthias, and Veronica gushed out collectively, but Lukas just looked down at the empty plate in front of him.

"What's for dinner?" he muttered, wanting to take the subject off of his and Matthias' relationship as soon as possible. Matthias finally caught on to his genuine discomfort and sat down in the chair next to him, nudging Lukas' knee with his own under the table: an unspoken question of whether he was okay. Lukas gave him a barely noticeable nod, not looking up from the plate.

"I was going to make you guys dinner tonight," Veronica piped up, glancing over her shoulder from where she was standing at the stove. "I know Maike has trouble cooking, so...I'm making pastitsio."

"Sounds good!" Matthias said, pushing a few stray strands of hair out of his face. "What is it, exactly?"

"Well, it's a special recipe from my mom's side of the family," Veronica explained, "but pastitsio is basically a type of Greek lasagna." She went back to cooking, and Matthias tapped his fingers on the table. Lukas just gazed off into the distance, tugging the sleeves of Matthias' jean jacket down over his wrists.

"Hey, what's goin' on up there?"

"Up where?" Lukas caught Matthias' gaze idly, quirking an eyebrow at him.

"In your head. You seem to be drifting is all."

Lukas shrugged and went back to drifting into an endless sea of thoughts. It was a little weird now, being around Matthias--and not that it was necessarily a bad sort of weird, but it was definitely weird. Everything felt the same, and yet different at the same time. He didn't even have the words to explain it, which was why he couldn't say anything to Matthias about it. He just wondered why everything felt so new and strange even though this wasn't even uncharted territory. It wasn't like their dynamic had changed at all. Matthias was still the same old Matthias, and he was the same old Lukas--albeit a more honest one.

Maybe it was that when Matthias said those things he always said or did the things he always did, Lukas knew it was because he was in love with him. And he kind of hated himself for not realizing sooner how obvious Matthias was being.