Summer of '93 [PERCIVER]

11 - LIVE GIGS AND SHARED CHIPS

As the time ticked nearer and the minutes apart from the beginning of the event and to the current moment lessened, Percy panicked. Never in his life had he held a crisis this major over material things like clothes. They all seemed to be identical to him now, blending with one another seamlessly. The stress was peaking at this point, he had focused too much energy onto those minor details and too little on any excitement he could have potentially possessed.

"I need to take a shower, then I will decide." He murmured to himself, breathing deeply.

With a nod to himself, he forced his eyes away from the closet, not even bothering to close the cupboard doors. The twins wouldn't return the room until after dinner anyway, so it didn't matter. He wandered to the bathroom and closed the door behind him with a soft click. His eyes darted to the mirror as he locked the door. One by one, his various pieces of clothing fell to the floor with a practiced ease. His jumper, jeans, long-sleeved turtleneck shirt, shoes, socks and underwear.

Percy stood naked in front of his mirror, cautiously stepping forward until hiss hands were gripping the counter. Here, he was at his most vulnerable. Anyone could walk in at that moment and see everything. Both physically and mentally. Bathrooms were perhaps one of the only places that Percy dared to be completely himself in. He exhaled shakily, frustrated.

He was incredibly tall, that was the first thing he noticed. Almost absurdly so. He hated the way people needed to tilt their heads up just to bother making eye contact because it felt like an inconvenience. He didn't need another reason as to why he was unapproachable. His torso and upper body were wiry, his ribs verging on the edge of visible. Percy supposed it was worse during exam season, in which he barely ate and had the unhealthy habit of fainting due to hunger or dehydration. His facial structure was very much the same, sharp and thin. Too cold, too hostile. Then there were those ridiculously juvenile freckles of his that planted themselves on every inch of his body. He despised his freckles almost more than anything else on his entire body.

Percy reached out to the mirror with his hand and leaned against it, forcing it to hold the little weight he did have. How could anyone ever lust after him? He wasn't classically handsome, nor was he the unconventional handsome that any other human being found appealing, and he never would be. Love wasn't in his destiny, he had long since acknowledged that, even if he hadn't quite moved on from it just yet. People would never feel for him the way he did for them. Never would he be the person their hearts raced for, the person their smiles resided from. His unlikeable tendencies haunted him and scarred him socially. And that was the way it was. Lust, however, was a more recent development, something he didn't quite understand just yet.

He sighed, running a hand through his hair and wincing at the sight of himself. This wasn't what composed and calm was meant to be, not at all. He knew he would be excited soon enough, after all, it was Oliver he was going to see. However, he wanted to impress. How was he meant to even attempt that with a body like his?

The water started, searing droplets falling onto the shower floor. Percy entered, adjusting it to the temperature he preferred accordingly. Under the steaming heat of the shower, he finally allowed himself to relax. His shoulders were no longer tense and back wasn't forced tightly into place by his own stubbornness to the ideas of prim and proper. Any previous thoughts of clothes no longer were.

A languid yet sincere smile overtook his entire expression.

"I'm going to be seeing him again."

Was Oliver overthinking this just as much as he was? Was Oliver grinning in anticipation just as he was? The dread had somehow just disappeared from his mind and for the first time that day, he finally permitted himself to express his excitement. The same questions he had been contemplating over the past week resurfaced, most to tease how easily his cheeks burned.