Mischief Managed

11: Ashes and Expires

I know I can't go back, I can't live my life over, but if I could...I would have started living sooner.

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I scaled one of Hogwarts's massive staircases, humming under my breath as the scent of the warm spring air began to fade from my nostrils. The last of our OWLs were over, and the Marauders and I had just successfully shot several boxfuls of Dr. Filibuster's fireworks above the lake. James had tried to persuade me to stay outside a little longer, but I'd be overcome by a sudden onslaught of fatigue.

At least, I reassured myself. Your mind's no longer troubled.

And that was true- after my shaky break-up with Dylan, I'd been completely unsure and anxious about our relationship would turn into, but Dylan and I were finally on speaking terms again.

I tried- as much as I could- not to dwell much on what he'd told me about Sirius. Nothing had happened between Padfoot and I, and I had nearly convinced myself that our relationship was only ever meant to be platonic.

I turned the corridor, then paused as I heard something odd. There were ugly, loud, unrestrained sobs coming from a balcony down the hall. Someone was crying.

Curious, I began walking quietly towards them. As I got closer, I began to make out two people, one with long, reddish hair- a girl- and the a taller one with shoulder-length black hair- a boy.

The boy sounded desperate, like he was pleading with the girl, and I recognized his slimy voice despite that the fact that it sounded quite different without its usual loathing.

"I never meant to call you a Mudblood, it just- "

"Slipped out?" the redhead, Lily, said coldly. "It's too late. I've made excuses for you for years.... You call everyone of my birth Mudblood, Severus. Why should I be any different?"

I stood a short distance away from them, half-concealed by a column, but I could clearly see the despair written all over Snivelly's face. Lily's expression was a horribly unfamiliar contrast of sadness and anger, and, for once in my life, I felt bad for her.

I'd never understood why she had always been such close friends with a Slytherin like Snivellus, but I figured since they'd been friends so long, ending their friendship would be more difficult than maintaining it.

I couldn't imagine the betrayal she must be suffering, because, despite all their faults, at least the Marauders were completely loyal.

Lily turned away from Snivellus. Her shoulders sagged and she said, "I can't pretend anymore. You've chosen your way, I've chosen mine."

"Lily- please- " Snivelly begged, his dark eyes widening as if he could hardly believe she was doing this.

In response, Lily refused to look back at him and hissed, "Leave."

"No," Snivellus protested. "No, we-we'll work this out, you know I didn't m-mean to-"

"Leave!" Lily repeated, her voice cracking slightly. "I can't stand the sound of your pathetic voice any longer."

"B-But," he attempted feebly.

Against my better judgement, I decided to step into the hallway.

"Leave her alone, Severus," I said, silently praying that Lily wouldn't reject me as well.

"You have no right to talk to her, and she's already told you to leave. Are you deaf?" I figured I'd already dipped one toe in the water, so I might as well go all in.

Severus scowled. I could have sworn I'd seen water collecting in his eyes, but he quickly wiped a hand across his face, and walked quickly away, saying, "Lily- please forgive me, you know-"