Sleepless dreams

Sleepless dreams II

I still dream of you.
But I guess my dreams don't come true,
Because your just the nightmare I woke up to.
I looked into your eyes and I could see that you knew.
And I knew that you didn't want to,
But you could see that I turned cold.
Is it my job to grow old and die of homophobe?
But it was you who I told before it all happened.
I never anticipated that this could happen.
I never really thought about it I guess.

But now your gone.
I have to be strong.
But this isn't where I belong belong.
But is it so wrong to think this way?
Is there nothing I could say
That would sway you to stay?
No? Didn't think so, just stay away.
I don't want to play anymore.
You cut me to the core
You've become such a bore,
I can't stand to look at you any more.

I don't mean to sound grim,
But it was you who tore me limb from limb.
I don't mean to sound dim,
But you filled my frustration to the brim.

And I'm sorry, I snapped. I broke.
But I think that was what finally woke me.
This isn't a joke, see?

It may appear that I like to disappear
But I just want you to know that I'll always be here.
I just need it to be clear,
So there isn't another tear.
I don't want you to fear
As you see me walking off the pier.
I know I don't belong here.
But this is the start of my career.
But trust me when I say that my words are sincere.

I need to let go,
But I can still see your lingering shadow, your echo.
I can't open the door.
There's nowhere I can call home anymore.
I could go out and explore,
But I can't seem to pull myself up from the floor.
There's nothing to hold onto, I think I'm slipping. I can't hold on
Maybe I should just let go?
I've got nothing to show,
I just can't bring myself to go that low.

I know I crossed the line.
But for one last time, can you look me in the eye and say my name?
If this is a game, I don't wanna play.
But there are a few things that I need to say and I need you to listen.
I never claimed to be a saint.
But that doesn't mean that you have to go out and taint my name.
You couldn't play the game and you lost.
You paid the price, the cost.
But that got me thinking, "wait a minute, so did I"

I had one singular mission.
All I had to do was trust my intuition and stay on the expedition.
But you gave me a decision and I screwed it up like always.

"Everyone has a story to tell.
But it's up to you if you tell it,
Or if you just scream and yell it."
I'd always knew that id be the one who fell.
But that's a story that I have to retell another time.
So for know I have to wrap up this rhyme in a pretty little bow.
And just so you know,
I never called you a whore or a hoe.
Once again, that just goes to show,
Just how low you'll go. Any way that's all for now. So G'night!