SALVATION [Vanitas x Noe x Reader]

Chapter 17 " Emotions "

    This chapter song:

' Joji - Like you do ' 

     "You are the one that I can not lose"

Late Night 

Hotel Room

A moon was lighting the room from the outside. Vanitas was crawling in his bed from nightmares that he was having. Suddenly, he woke up, sitting on the bed and hardly exhaling. His face was covered with beads of sweat. Vanitas looked around seeing Noe sleeping in the bed, but she was not next to him. He noticed an opened window. The wind was getting inside of the room, playing with curtains. Vanitas got up, not even taking his coat. He jumped into the window, getting up the roof. She was sitting on the other side in the nightdress, looking at the bright moon. The wind was playing with her hair. Vanitas froze looking at her from the back. 

- Are you going to come or you will stay standing here? - her voice made him flinch, getting out of his head. She turned around looking at his astonished face. Her eyes became wider seeing his face filled with broken emotions and pain. She stood up, getting closer to him. She stand in front of him, seeing how tears started appearing in the corner of his eyes. 

- I am sorry, I am so sorry, [y/n], - said Vanitas. His voice cracked. He fell on his knees, looking down, feeling how everything was breaking him from the inside. Seeing him like this made her feel the pain that he was going through in her eyes. She sat down, taking his cheeks in her hands, wiping his tears away, - If I haven't met if you could just live a normal life. It is all my fault. Please forgive me. I didn't want to push you. I would never do anything like that. I always only tried to protect you. Even when he died.

- Even when he died? What do you mean? - she was quiet, trying to understand his hysterical mumbling. She made him put his head on her lap. 

- I was here when your friend died, I tried to call for Ruthven when it happened, but I couldn't save him. After it, I tried to do everything to learn how to protect you. I am sorry, I couldn't even save you that day, - when he said it, Vanitas crying became hysterical. After what she heard, she couldn't hear any sound around her. Hearing this made her chest feel a painful feeling from the past that she covered inside for a long time. She looked at Vanitas closed eyes filled with tears. 

- That's not possible to save everyone, don't blame yourself. No one could do anything that day. So everything you are doing right now, is it because of me? - she slowly started realizing his urge to save vampires. His real hidden motives. Vanitas opened his eyes, sitting in front of her. He smiled through tears and pain.

- I just want to save you, save people around you. I don't want you to feel pain. Loving is about giving yourself to the person you love, is it not? - Vanitas smiled wider, placing his hand on her cheek and softly stroking it. She was looking at him, stunned to speak, hearing those words. She could see how a line of blood got out of his nose. He used too much of his powers when he knew that he shouldn't.

- Vanitas, you are, - Vanitas took her hand when she tried to wipe his blood, not letting her touch it. He put his head on her shoulders, closing his eyes.

- That's alright, it is nothing, - his voice slowly became normal, comforting her, but she couldn't get rid of his words in her head. She put her hand on top of his head.

- Why didn't you think about yourself? Why don't you care about yourself? - she started raising her voice feeling how anger took over her mind, - I don't want you to die, don't you understand? Are you thinking of saving me, but killing yourself? Do you think that will make me feel better?