A Million Pieces - Hunger Games (Catching Fire & Mockingjay)

Chapter 31

One day Malila visits alone, and she brings a cat.

"Hi, Sapphy," she says, dumping the animal on my lap.

"Hey Lila," I reply. She grins, as if she's still surprised I can manage a smile. The thought pains me. "What's this?"

"It's my friend's cat," she says and pretends to gag. "I think he's ugly and smelly, but I thought you might like to meet him."

I smile and touch the cat's head. He looks at me suspiciously for a few seconds, but then he settles down on my lap and lets me pet him. Around his neck, someone has tied a blue ribbon. I touch it with my fingers, frowning.

"This... it reminds me of something," I say, mostly to myself.

"Caspian sent you a blue ribbon when you were in the Games," Malila says quietly. "For your birthday."

The initial reaction of fear at hearing about my connection with Caspian is still there, but it has dulled down to a constant anxiety. Now, I feel guilty every time he is mentioned. I drop the ribbon and go back to stroking the cat.

"Are you going to catch me up?" I say to Malila and she launches into her daily speech.

"It's mostly Capitol people having tantrums about the conditions here or refugees getting lost in all the tunnels. I can't believe there's so many people in Panem, and we're all so different!" she confides. "Prim's friend Gale told me that he's seen a bear before."

"Wow," I breathe, not bothering to hide my awe, but it must be nothing compared to how she feels. She has been confined to District 4 her entire life, the idea of other places and people has been as foreign as flying. "Did you tell him about our dolphins?" She nods enthusiastically. "Well, this is good, right? We're all going to get along." It's what's been drilled into my head by the doctors. I believe it. I want to. But the overpowering feeling is that I need to make sure Malila feels safe. "Tell me about the people you've met."

"The kids at school are nice," she says, "but their lives have been so different. Rory's from District 12 and he's my friend. He introduced me to Prim. I think she's really pretty." At this, her cheeks go pink and she hastens to add, "This is her cat."

"Katniss's sister."

"Yes, she says that you're very brave," Malila adds, as if it's a secret.

"Prim is sweet," I smile.

"She is. She's going to be a doctor and she's letting me help her at the hospital. I'm really terrible with fixing people, but I can sort out medication really well. Cas says it helps me concentrate. District 13 isn't really adapted to the energy I have."

I smile, albeit a little sadly. Malila has always been fidgety, never able to keep still or focus for very long. I'm glad she's finding a way to take care of herself now that she can't run outside into the sea. "That's really great, Lila."

She smiles proudly, but it slips off her face just as quickly. "Sapphire, everything is going to change, isn't it?"

"Yes. But it'll be for the better, won't it?"

"Probably," she agrees, frowning. "But what if it's not good enough?"

I blink. I've been here for weeks now - maybe longer - and nobody has asked me what I think about the situation. They just want to get better, they shelter me and tell me we'll be okay. Maybe it's for the best, because now I'm too scared to think about it.

"Where is all this coming from?" I poke her in the side. "What happened to my little dolphin?"

She smiles so genuinely that my chest feels warm. I've been using the nickname ever since she started walking and couldn't stop bouncing off the walls. Then she started swimming and keeping her out of the water became virtually impossible. It's a little reminder of home.