Begin Again

Chapter One

*TW: Physical Abuse, Emotional Abuse*

"The pain has outweighed the pleasure. Don't think I can fake another night".

That was last year. I finally left him, but it was no easy task, believe me.

***

"Salomé, I'll be going on a pilgrimage to Rome tomorrow, and I need to organise everything at the church, so I'll be home late." He was not asking her.

She could only nod her head. He had just used her own car keys to cut her arm, and the blood was still flowing out.

"Okay, honey." She replied, from their en suite. She was rummaging for a plaster big enough for the wound. The water from the tap mixed with the blood and flowed into the drain quickly, leaving no trace of blood on the porcelain. If only my problems in life would vanish like that...

***

"You're staying put!" he barked, as his cheeks reddened in anger.

He was clasping my keys with such a tight grip, so I had no other option but gamble and make a reach for them.

"Give...them to me...Richard!"

Both my hands grabbed his clasped hand and I pulled with all the energy I had in me, in attempt to bring them closer to me. I guess I had underestimated his strength. It was like I was lifting heavy weights except it was only the resistance of my husband. We stumbled around in the room, with my hands still holding his. I could hear myself struggling, whilst he was silent. I don't even remember how long this was going on for. It reminded me of our honeymoon night, when we danced for hours on end.

"Give me my fucking keys!" I screamed, back in the present. When I managed to bring his hand close to my face, I did the only thing that would probably disarm his tight grip. I bit him. That's when he snapped.

"You bitch!"

With great strength, he pulled and removed my hold on him. The force pushed me back a few strides and I had to hold on to the edge of the bed to compose myself.

"Now look what you made me do!"

I looked at him like he was mad. Then I felt a stinging sensation along my arm. Along my forearm was an open wound with my blood flowing along my brown skin. I stared at what he inflicted upon me again. The pain was unbearable. Tears welled in my eyes as I bit my tongue to try and stop myself from crying out. He hated seeing me cry.

I looked up at him to see him looking at me with regret in his eyes. He dropped my keys on the bed and began to walk towards me, with the same hand that wounded me outstretched as a sort of comforting gesture.

"Stop. Please. I'm fine." I whispered, giving him a watery smile. He ran his hand over his face in distraught as I slowly walked towards the bathroom to tend my wound. The keys were still on the bed when I left the room.

After I had done all I could to stop the excess bleeding, I came back to see him, smiling on his phone. I solved his problem, so he was okay again.

***

Whenever he had to leave with whatever excuse he gave her, he would hide her house and key cars. What was he so afraid of? If he loved me properly, he wouldn't have to fear me leaving him. She had had enough...

"Darling, this is ridiculous. Where would I go without you, anyway?" She pleaded, with her hand outstretched, reaching for her keys. She was still determined to have control over her own life.